Just, ugh.

[Indigo]

I had an old hag give a lecture on how immoral I was and I was going to hell for buying lube - I handed her the bottle and told her that obviously she needed it more than me. She looked shocked/horrified and asked me what on earth I thought she would need it for. I told her it was for the stick shoved up her ass.

[Eisa]

^I'm sorry, but...

Good Lord, who cares WHAT someone else is buying? Pregnancy tests, lube...I don't care if they're buying pink fuzzy handcuffs, whipped cream, and a cat o' nine-tails, it's none of my business.

[jedimaster91]

I don't care if they're buying pink fuzzy handcuffs, whipped cream, and a cat o' nine-tails, it's none of my business.

ARG! Why does Mr Jedi have to be such a prude? That sounds like fun.



I do have a good friend who's been trying to have a baby for years. She's the type who would collapse in a puddle of hystarical sobbing if someone pulled that on her. I'm the kind that will verbally disembowl the idiot stupid enough to mess with her.

[greek_jester]

I don't care if they're buying pink fuzzy handcuffs, whipped cream, and a cat o' nine-tails, it's none of my business.

That reminds me of a prank someone I used to know pulled once. At one point he was working at a rather large firm who took on school leavers as apprentices. They had a very wet behind-the-ears lad start. He got sent out for various things, including being sent to the supermarket for Vaseline, a cucumber & marigolds (rubber gloves), & being sent to the local DIY shop for striped paint. The sad thing is, he fell for it every time...

[chainedbarista]

mm, light bdsm...what?

i'm thinking she'd need a pallet load of lube; it wasn't a stick, it was a redwood lodged in there.

[Talon]

The discovery that she was married and 22 led to cat but faces.

Again, just no winning. You're not the irresponsible teen they think you are, but wait: you proved them wrong. How dare you interfere with their holier-than-thou-narrative?

A couple of people who were staring really bad, she made a fist with her left hand and said "I'm married, ok?!" and then she got nasty looks from that as well.

Times like that, the wedding band should be on the middle finger if you know what I mean.

[zombiequeen]

I had an old lady try that this past weekend when I picked up a pregnancy test, I just broke down into tears (helped that I was terribly cramped up) and hubby went all "My wife and I are trying to have a child, but she keeps miscarrying." on her. She still took my test and waddled off muttering about us being sinners, so I had to go all the way across the store to get another one.
Saw her talking to a random stocker person about how we were evil and going to hell, and he looked at us and was like "Is that the people you were harrassing? Would you guys like to fill out an incident report for store security?" I have never seen an old person waddle away so fast! I still am upset that she would say something, so what if I'm buying a pregnancy test? The doctor let me know that it was a great idea to test every couple months, even if you use birth control or whatever (I use 2 forms of contraceptive, but women in my family are quite fertile). I guess I was more upset at hubby having to lie to her to make her stop screeching at me about being a sinner though, people should just keep out of your business when it comes to that sort of thing.

[PepperElf]

ooo isn't it nice to have a cop there when you need one?



and yay that zombie game sounds fun

[mikoyan29]

what the hell is wrong with a pregnancy test anyway?

[shankyknitter]

immoral teens and college students are having sex before marriage and are being irresponsible and thus are getting pregnant! By SC logic that means that if they take the test away we won't know if we're pregnant and thus will be more scared and never want to have sex again. Thus by not engaging in sex before marriage they'll have saved our souls and shown us the error of our ways!

Completely made up to make no sense. Just the way SCs would want it. e

[blas]

What happens when that old hag sees a guy buy a test?

[teh_blumchenkinder]

re: Excuse Me!
*takes a deep breath*
Ahhhhhhh... immediate pwnage. Eet eez a fine wine...

[Mytical]

Light BSDM is fun . As for the old woman..yeah I don't understand the logic. Not even gonna try, my poor brain cells would justifiably revolt, got few enough as is, don't need to lose more.

[Becks]

Actually me and my HUSBAND have been trying to have a child for years.

It would totally be worth it to see the look on her face.

Stole my answer.

[wolfie]

What happens when that old hag sees a guy buy a test?

Sounds like something out of an "eight is enough" episode - parent found a pregnancy test stashed in a hall closet, and wanted to know which teenage daughter it belonged to. Turned out to be the pre-teen son, who was wondering about his pet hamster.