couples and crazies and creepers, oh my! (Lupo's Shopping Shenanigans pt 11 million)

[EvilEmpryss]

Lupo's bodyguard should be some 6 foot 3, flaming, leather bear who can dissuade creeps by rubbing up on them and looking sexy.

Protection and eye-candy. ^w^

Like this guy? http://www.hotboots.com/images/greggc3.jpg
NSFW!!!

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

I bet if Lupo found a purple bra, the creepy guy's head would've exploded. Actually, both of them.

Which would be ideal as long as Lupo doesn't get any shrapnel on her.

[BlaqueKatt]

160 pounds of corn-fed farm girl muscle here....I volunteer to be bodyguard

[HorrorFrogPrincess]

Like this guy? http://www.hotboots.com/images/greggc3.jpg
NSFW!!!

PERFECT! Wonder what he charges by the hour.

[XCashier]

...

Ok. That's it. I'm starting a Lupo's Shopping Trip Bodyguard fund. Who wants to chip in, and does anyone have recommendations for who we should hire?

I think we should hire the security people from Target. Sounds like they were pretty savvy there and (hopefully) kicked the creep to the curb, or called the cops and had him arrested.

Damn, that was awful. I'm so glad you weren't hurt, Lupo. You did the right thing by calling attention to the problem. So many women are raised to "not make a scene" and that's exactly what the creeps are counting on, so the polite, demure women become their next victims.

See, the hilarious thing is, when I'm shopping with OTHER people, the crazy magnet shuts off!!

Naturally. Bullies and pervs go after lone targets, they won't mess with groups. Perhaps organize a shopping party once a week with three or five of your friends?

[Mytical]

Ok, yes I would relocate to be the Bodyguard..but seeing as I have a bad history with shopping also..that might be tempting fate. Might create a vortex of suck that would rend the fabric of space and time, or something. Of course maybe the two forces would cancel each other out, and I would be about as useless as a lamp post.

[Food Lady]

Mytical comes to mind, if Lupo approves.

I thought of him right away, too.

[Mytical]

I do make a pretty good Guard Gargoyle. For some reason I don't have to say or DO anything besides LOOK at somebody. Then they back away..slowly.

[dalesys]

I do make a pretty good Guard Gargoyle. For some reason I don't have to say or DO anything besides LOOK at somebody. Then they back away..slowly.

Thats 'cause you Guard the Goyles. ... Everybody takes you for granite.

[mharbourgirl]

I'll tell my brother to look you up next time he heads for a sales convention in Texas, Lupo. Baby brother is 6'5", 250lbs, and has a VERY disturbing grin. He also has very little tolerance for creepers and won't hesitate to start LOOMING. BB looms very impressively.

He's also extremely fun to go shopping with. Boy has a clothes fetish and could happily shop all day.

[Kristev]

That man in the picture was beautiful.

The man following you around the store was a complete sicko.

[Squeaksmyalias]

I do make a pretty good Guard Gargoyle. For some reason I don't have to say or DO anything besides LOOK at somebody. Then they back away..slowly.

Is it wrong I wish to see this? The problem would be me giggling and bouncing after I saw you do that.

[fireheart]

Thats 'cause you Guard the Goyles. ... Everybody takes you for granite.

Oh dear god the PUNS.....the PUNS....

*grabs the radishes*

[Canarr]

...

Ok. That's it. I'm starting a Lupo's Shopping Trip Bodyguard fund. Who wants to chip in, and does anyone have recommendations for who we should hire?

Please, don't. I gain great entertainment from Lupo's suffering.

[bainsidhe]

Wow, security took him away? Your shopping skillz are improving!