Hick Wedding

[smileyeagle1021]

Ben, you just made me feel so much better about my upcoming wedding... our theme is fuck themes.
The programs (which we made ourselves) have a picture of us in front of a replica old west building (with a sign that says "odd couple rest home"... seriously, couldn't resist getting a phone in front of that). We are wearing traditional Scottish outfits. The wedding party will be wearing suits/skirts (as is appropriate) with a scarf and or tie in the tartan for their respective clans. The venue is a mountain cabin theme (it was a steal, it's really a meeting hall for the state park service, but they let people rent it out when it's not in use for state park business). The food is going to be deli style (because, well damnit, I want sandwiches.) The cake is a plane two tier (white with purple accents and decorated with fake roses), which will be surrounded by a rainbow of cupcakes... oh, and the cake toppers are rubber duckies (seriously, I found rubber ducky cake toppers, that is one of those things you just HAVE to use once you've found them ). Oh and the afterparty is going to be at a buffet back down in the city, because no one could agree on what they wanted to eat (all 25 of us who are going). Is it classy, hell no, but it's going to be a lot of fun.

... also, I'm reminded that I have to harass our friend who agreed to DJ about making sure she knows what songs we want.

[iradney]

Just a note here guys:

OP's husband obviously did not tell the guests and happy couple what he's saying here. He did his job, then came home and told his wife about this wedding.

I'm sure at least 99% of us have done this. Done our job, then come and told our SO/Friend/Neighbour "ZOMG you will NOT believe the redneck/valley girl/prostitot/half naked Victoria's secret model I saw today!"

Carry on.

[Ben_Who]

I understand that some people do the hick wedding thing as a "theme." It's kind of cute in an ironic way. And, let's face it, it's a way to stay under budget. If the marriage is true, bless 'em.

...Then there's my sister's wedding.

I knew my mother was thrifty, but I had no idea that she was one of the most spectacularly cheap people on the face of the Earth until I showed up in my rented tuxedo. They didn't even have it in their own church, she was that cheap. She found a cheaper church. This was one of those whitewashed clapboard Baptist things in the toolies rather than the soaring 300-year-old stone Protestant structure she frequents. The reception was in the basement, which...hell, it looked like a basement. Concrete walls, little windows...you get the gist. At least it was painted yellow.

Folding chairs. Folding tables. Not unusual. No tablecloths? Not even cheap plastic disposable ones. Music? My cousin plays the bagpipes. BADLY. Mother made the cake. ... It was a sheet cake. It looked like a glacier. It looked as if it had been frosted with a fire extinguisher. She also made the dress. She sews as well as she bakes. My poor sister looked like a parade float. There were no flowers.

I stood there in a six hundred dollar suit looking like James Bond in "Deliverance." Photographer? Yeah, that would be me, which I found out when Dad shoved a disposable Kodak in my hands and told me to start taking pictures.

Don't get me wrong: I disagree with the philosophy that a wedding should cost more than a mortgage. And maybe she had a point; the marriage only lasted three and a half years. But it was as if she wanted ALL the elements of a "traditional" $50,000 wedding without having to pay for ANY of them. It was a cargo-cult wedding.

I don't think she was hurting for money at the time, either...

Love, Who?

[AccountingDrone]

Well that used to be traditional on Barrayar for the Emperor and Empress. Gotta prove you're not muties, after all...

I prefer Gregor's style, mutual inspection with a doctor, perfect for getting the shot of valium at the same time =)

But hopefully not for the guests.

One of my favorite authors, BTW.

And mine <i'm on the email list =) ]

[Mr Hero]

I feel like breaking into song after reading the topic title. It's a great day for a hick wedding.

[Indigo]

Some crowds are dancing crowds, and some aren't, I guess.
I imagine it's really frustrating for a DJ to deal with.

I would agree with this. If you know ahead of time that your crowd is not going to be the dancing type, then don't hire a DJ that likes to hype the crowd up. None of my relatives really dance so if we have music it'll probably be a mp3 player with some speakers for background noise.

Other than that, it was their wedding and if that's what made them happy, then I'm glad for them.

[mikoyan29]

Sounds like a theme to me.

[FenigDurak]

Sounds like quite a few people spent a bit of money on that wedding. I mean, how common is it to have black Carharts? it's certainly a new twist on the popular black and white motif.

[Ree]

Just a reminder that Ghel was sharing a vent from her husband, and the "fail to see the suck" rule still holds, even if we may not agree with everything in the post.

[Ghel]

You know what, screw it. I'm guessing a blood test was not part of the run-up to this wedding.

No, blood tests are not required in Minnesota. And from Hubby's description, it didn't look like the bride's family tree forked.

Also this just as easily could've come from my state, even though the OP is one state away from mine. The state motto really needs to be changed to "Like Alabama, but cold."

I totally agree.

I guess I'm a bit surprised the DJ didn't have some warning on what to expect. The ones around here usually meet with the bride & groom-to-be and discuss the plan, songs, etc.

For DJing, Hubby works for a local sound company that does the contracts and is the primary contact with the customer. Hubby got a list of songs they wanted played and what their colors were, and that was about it. The bride's sister was the one who signed the contract. Hubby described her as nice, but with an annoying laugh.

A friend of mine showed me pics from the wedding of one of her high schools friends. The theme?

John Deere.

Hubby DJed a wedding once that was Packers/Vikings. The groom's family was all dressed in Packers jerseys, and the bride's family was all dressed in Vikings jerseys. I don't remember if the bride and groom dressed traditionally or not.

[spark]

I can imagine it'd be frustrating for a DJ to put up with some of that crap, but I gotta agree that putting them down for the style of their wedding (or lack thereof!) rubs me the wrong way. Hats, hicks, funny cakes, why should that matter? I had some weird stuff at mine. I didn't hire anybody who could look at me funny for it though, most of it was done by friends and family. Although then again my mother in law looked at me funny, and then ignored me and did her bits how she wanted them anyhow. :P Thankfully all she could screw with was the decorations and the table setup.

[Android Kaeli]

If I ever get married, it will not cost more then $200-300 and be done in front of a Justice of the Peace with a couple of witnesses. The money that would've gone to the wedding would be spent on the honeymoon and a party after getting married.

I just can't fathom putting that much money, time, effort, and stress into one single day.

[MoonCat]

Well that used to be traditional on Barrayar for the Emperor and Empress. Gotta prove you're not muties, after all...

But hopefully not for the guests.

One of my favorite authors, BTW.

[South Texan]

Awww...now that was harsh.

I agree with you 100%, Ree.

[Shalom]

LOL...I got an email today about a bride and groom who stripped naked for their wedding.
It seems that pretty much everything and anything goes for weddings anymore.

Well that used to be traditional on Barrayar for the Emperor and Empress. Gotta prove you're not muties, after all...