Fun With Firecrackers

[Bob The Random Boy Wonder]

Oh, boy...my neighbors. This is one from today. Honestly, I don't know. I just...don't know.

BACKSTORY: My neighbors have the most redneck friends in the entire world. They are so redneck, I hear "Dueling Banjos" play in my head whenever I look at them. Honestly, this is not the first story in the sage of Ol' Boy, but he outdid himself today. Today, he decided to bring some leftover firecrackers to the neighbor's house from the 4th of July and set them off at whim. Apparently, my neighbors didn't have a problem with it. This is what followed. Redneck-to-English translation is included.

NGRF = Neighbor Guy w/Redneck Friend. We'll call him "John".
RG = Redneck Guy
FC = Firecrackers
ON = Other Neighbor
Me =

RG: Hurr! Hurr hurr! I's a-gonna settem off 'n put some'n this heer bleew sturf onnit! Whatchu thank dere, Jonny? *lights firecrackers with match and drops them in bucket filled with God-knows-what*
(English translation: I am amused! I am going to put some of this dangerous blue chemical on the firecrackers. What do you think, John?)
NGRF: Uh...you didn't put any of that stuff on those, did you?
RG: WHUT?! Yew meens-ta tell me "flaimmble" and "inflaimmble" meens da same thang! Gits me da water bukkit rite quick!
(English translation: Crap! You're telling me that "flammable" still means "flammable" in another language?! Get the water--fast!")

Yes, "flammable" and "inflammable" mean the same thing. It's not multiple choice. What did you think it meant--some of said chemical is flammable, and some is not flammable? Needless to say, neighbor guy didn't get the water fast enough...

FC: *pop, pop-pop, BAM, BAM-BA-BAM-BAM, BOOSH! BA-BOOM BOOM!*

Upon hearing the noise, Other Neighbor runs out of the house and sees me staring in awe at what had just happened.

ON: (to me) What the HELL was that?!
Me: *shakes head and points at RG, staring at the scene like he didn't have a clue what just happened* You don't want to know. You don't even want to know.

They're seriously lucky they didn't kill themselves--or start a huge fire, considering it's been 100 degrees (heat index 120+) and dry here for several weeks. This is not to mention their kids were also outside at the time. What a shining example of stupidity these people are setting for their kids.

[Ironclad Alibi]

That sounds like a remake of the opening scenes of Idiocracy.

[Kristev]

What is wrong with the human race?

[Racket_Man]

What is wrong with the human race?

you remember where you are, don't you?????

[Little Retail Rabbit]

*Deliverance tune plays*

[PepperElf]

i'm just astonished still that there are states that have open sales of fireworks.

i was raised in NY state where the only place you can - legally - get fireworks is the reservation. unless you're talking the "harmless" ones like sparklers etc.


but here down in the mid south... they sell them in tents set up in fields and parking lots. and they're all legal. you can even shoot them off inside the city limits too i think.

[Kittish]

Yes, "flammable" and "inflammable" mean the same thing. It's not multiple choice. What did you think it meant--some of said chemical is flammable, and some is not flammable? Needless to say, neighbor guy didn't get the water fast enough...

Now, see, this is one that doesn't make any damn sense at all in English. Just almost every other word I can think of that has the 'in-' prefix means NOT. Incapable, incompetent, insincere.... you get the idea. But this ONE word means IS... *shakes head*

[Sparky]

Now, see, this is one that doesn't make any damn sense at all in English. Just almost every other word I can think of that has the 'in-' prefix means NOT. Incapable, incompetent, insincere.... you get the idea. But this ONE word means IS... *shakes head*

Flammable (flame + able) means it will burn.
Inflammable (inflame + able) means it will catch on fire.

So in effect, they mean the same thing. But of course you're right; it's confusing.

[Midnight_Angel]

Huh? What? So this 'in' before 'flammable' is not a negation prefix?

*runs for cover*

[Captain Trips]

This is exactly why OSHA is trying to get the words "inflammable" and "imflammable" removed from any workplaces. They ARE misleading, as they all mean "this can burn." "Flammable" sounds enough like "flame able" that they want to use that word only.

Of course, that won't stop "hold my beer, watch this" stupidity.

[Kristev]

I'm at Wal-Mart - on the first of the month, as a janitor.

But this week I get to host a panel at "Fandemonium."

[Dreamstalker]

Now I'm curious what the blue stuff was...only thing I can think of is some type of toilet cleaner.

Just almost every other word I can think of that has the 'in-' prefix means NOT. Incapable, incompetent, insincere.... you get the idea. But this ONE word means IS... *shakes head*

That's what I always thought...luckily my self-preservation instinct is good enough that I never decided to test that theory.

Outside of Santa Fe, there's a fireworks store next to a self-storage place...that always gets a "WTF" from us (but maybe that's where they store extra inventory? could explain why we never see anyone there). I don't see why they don't ban fireworks in the state outright during dry seasons, 'please don't do this' doesn't seem to work well.

There's talk about allowing them here; not sure what benefit that would have. Extra revenue, sure; which would promptly be eaten up by fire departments responding to the idiots.