You better NOT give me what I order!

[MoonCat]

Dave Allen used to do a bit about a drunk ordering breakfast at a diner:
(Paraphrasing here) "I want one egg all runny...the other one so hard you can't cut it. I want the toast burned black, the bacon raw, and big, greasy fingerprints all over the plate!"

Waiter: "Sir, we can't serve a meal like that!"
Drunk: "Why not? You did yesterday."