Gazebo goes to the theater

[Antisocial_Worker]

Last night my boyfriend and I attended a performance of In the Next Room, or, The Vibrator Play. Very enjoyable, except for the woman sitting next to us.

Here's what she did.

1 -- The playgoers were milling around in the lobby of the theater before the performance. She, a black woman, caught sight of my boyfriend and remarked to her white companion in a snotty -- and loud -- tone of voice, "Well, at least there's one other black person here."

2 -- After the play started, we found ourselves sitting right next to her. She proceeded to laugh -- loudly -- at inopportune times throughout the play, as well as at the funny parts...

3 -- ...And cough. Loudly. Throughout the entire play.

4 -- ...And snort. Loudly. Throughout the entire play.

5 -- ...And clear her throat. Loudly. Throughout the entire play.

6 -- ...And make a weird mucus-snorting sound deep in her throat that was not quite a snort or a cough. Instead, it sounded quite a bit like a honk. Loudly. Throughout the entire play.

7 -- ...And -- and this was the worst part. Fart. Silently. Throughout the entire play. Every few minutes a peculiar and peculiarly... intestinal... smell would waft our way. We know it was her because when she got up during the intermission, the wafting stopped. When she returned, it started right up again.

Gawd. On the bright side, at least the play itself was enjoyable enough to overcome even the worst behavior its audience members could throw at it.

[LillFilly]

I...think I would have to move after the farting.

[fireheart]

The Vibrator Play?

Is that a NSFW play?

[Antisocial_Worker]

The Vibrator Play?

Is that a NSFW play?

Very much so, but it's a scream, plus it has some genuinely touching (no pun intended) moments. It's basically a two hour comedy about the themes of Victorian sexual repression, women's rights, racial tension, tension and misunderstanding between the sexes, and other fun things.

Edit: I forgot to mention that one of the big corporate sponsors of this play here in my city is a large local sex toys store. They've having a promotion called Hump Day Wednesdays where, if you attend the play on a Wednesday, you get a free vibrator from that store.

[Dilorenzo]

Okay, wait, what? Seriously, what?

This sounds more like a Key & Peele sketch than something that should actually happen.

[PepperElf]

Times like this... Doctor Who quotes are excellent material....

Excuse me, do you mind not farting while I'm saving the world?

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Yesterday, as I was filling laundry detergent off the truck, I got flagged down for help by an older lady wanting help with the freezer bags.

And then, after I tell her what we have and she tells me that isn't what she wants, I hear a sharp BLAT! from her butt.



I was like "sorrywedon'thavewhatyou'relookingforanythingelset odaynothankyoubye."

ETA: farty conference-call goodness from my second-favorite site on the internet.

[Draper Mel]

The Special Hell

Shepherd Book doesn't specifically mention people who fart, but I'm sure it's included.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NVxLz6O6MaI

[Draper Mel]

1 -- The playgoers were milling around in the lobby of the theater before the performance. She, a black woman, caught sight of my boyfriend and remarked to her white companion in a snotty -- and loud -- tone of voice, "Well, at least there's one other black person here."

I figured as well as being a smart ass, I could answer this as a theater professional. We'd love to see more African American patrons in the audience, so if you're black, why not encourage your black friends to come to the theater with you? Get a group from your church together. (Okay, maybe The Vibrator Play wouldn't be the best choice, but still.) Bring your family, especially your kids. There's plenty of theater that's fine for kids, especially once they're over 10 and can handle sitting still for 2 hours. And then they'll grow up knowing that theater isn't all snooty and hard to understand, and there's more out there than Tyler Perry movies.

[Opalin]

Yep. Strange as it may sound, one of the best ways to make sure you're not the only person of a race at 'blank' bring a friend. If you don't want to bring a friend, just because of their race, then... WHY THE HELL DOES IT MATTER? You shouldn't care about the audience, you should care about enjoying the play!

I'd have given her a cough drop after the first few coughs, and tried to see if I could get re-seated during intermission.

[celticgrl]

Last night my boyfriend and I attended a performance of In the Next Room, or, The Vibrator Play.

3 -- ...And cough. Loudly. Throughout the entire play.

4 -- ...And snort. Loudly. Throughout the entire play.

5 -- ...And clear her throat. Loudly. Throughout the entire play.

6 -- ...And make a weird mucus-snorting sound deep in her throat that was not quite a snort or a cough. Instead, it sounded quite a bit like a honk. Loudly. Throughout the entire play.

You're not in NC are you cause I swear this woman was sitting next to me at Casey's BBQ a few weeks ago when I took my mom and dad out for their anniversary dinner.

[fireheart]

Very much so, but it's a scream, plus it has some genuinely touching (no pun intended) moments. It's basically a two hour comedy about the themes of Victorian sexual repression, women's rights, racial tension, tension and misunderstanding between the sexes, and other fun things.

Edit: I forgot to mention that one of the big corporate sponsors of this play here in my city is a large local sex toys store. They've having a promotion called Hump Day Wednesdays where, if you attend the play on a Wednesday, you get a free vibrator from that store.

At least it wasn't Puppetry Of The Penis! (VERRRY NSFW)

[Antisocial_Worker]

You're not in NC are you cause I swear this woman was sitting next to me at Casey's BBQ a few weeks ago when I took my mom and dad out for their anniversary dinner.

I am, in fact, in North Carolina. Where is this "Casey's BBQ" of which you speak?

At least it wasn't Puppetry Of The Penis! (VERRRY NSFW)

True, but we can't have everything we want in life... Sigh...

[pageantmama]

I have seen snippets of that play on youtube and I want to go see it. I live in GA though and I don't think any of the local companies here would do it, not very moral you know, lol. I love the part where they are talking about what is going on in the room and the servant lady comes out and they ask her if she has ever felt any of those sensations and she is like, you mean like when I am with my husband? and they look at each other like WTH is she talking about. Shows how repressed women were in that area. I still could not imagine going to the doctor for depression and then using a vibrator to "cure" me, lol. Might have been why so many women were depressed back then though

[ThanosIsKing]

Last night my boyfriend and I attended a performance of In the Next Room, or, The Vibrator Play. Very enjoyable, except for the woman sitting next to us.

I've heard great things about the script. I'm gonna catch it in a couple weeks. Good friend of mine is directing a local run of it here in Denver. All I can tell you is that if anybody acted in my theatre like that woman acted I wouldn't hesitate to kick her out. I can't stand people who go to plays only to ruin the experience for everyone. It's worse than at movies since it can take even the actors out of the moment.