Traffic jam near dairy section - Get off the phone!

[vikingchyk]

Yes, same old story, but I need to vent a little. Yesterday, I was almost squished by not one, but TWO people wandering thru the grocery store, yammering on their phones. At the same time!

It was a fairly wide triangular aisle/area, and one was on the right side of the aisle, and one was on the left. No problem, plenty of room, I can drive up the middle. Except Lefty zigged right, and Righty zagged left, at the exact moment I was going between. Thankfully, no collision, and both were oblivious of what almost happened, and I'm swearing under my breath.
to you both! Get off the phone!

I probably would have won, since I had a cart, and they both only had hand-baskets - ramming speed!! Then Righty has a moment of non-obliviousness, and tries to speed up to stay ahead of me! I won.

I got what I needed and looped back thru the area, and almost got slammed by Righty *again*. So then I'm forced to follow her thru a narrower section (naturally she's walking up the middle, so no way to pass her on either side) and listen to her *fascinating* conversation. Ugh. "I got bread, just passed the milk, I think I'll go over to..."

SRLY?? Who is the poor person on the other end, listening to this riveting play-by-play?? I hope it's a shut-in who appreciates living vicariously through you, otherwise they are probably bored to tears, and trying to figure out how to block your calls.

I wonder if some of these dolts are doing it on purpose? Maybe I should invest in a bicycle bell, or air horn, to let them know they are about to hit me. Or a cow catcher. Or chariot spikes. The possibilities are endless. And I always wonder if some of them are those cellphone faker nuts. Righty's conversation might have been fake. Or she really is that boring.

[wolfie]

Do they make moose bumpers to fit shopping carts? As for "righty" dawdling up the middle of the aisle so there's no room to pass, it's a "3 strikes" issue - "excuse me", "EXCUSE ME", "Coming through!"

[MoonCat]

I've wanted an air horn for years! Idiots have been around a lot longer than cell phones. Just imagine, the next some some brainless twit leaves their cart blocking the aisle, or a group of 14 people decide to stop and have a family reunion in the middle of an aisle.....BLAATTTTTT!! It would be lovely.

[ralerin]

I'd personally prefer one of these lovely whistles, if only blowing it indoors would not blow my eardrums with it..l

[Moosenogger]

My mother pisses me off with how oblivious she is when she's on her cell phone. I remember one time where she almost caused an accident (as a passenger in my car - she wasn't even driving!) and didn't even realize it.

She's yapping away on her phone as I pull to a stop-light. There's a right-turn lane next to me, and just as a car is approaching on the right in order to turn, my mother throws open the passenger-side door so she can reach behind the seat and grab the seat belt. I was so shocked at how stupid that was that I had the same look on my face as the other driver (who looked absolutely PISSED). My mother, of course, still chattered away on her cell phone, none the wiser as to how she'd almost thrown my car door into another vehicle.

[dalesys]

My mother, of course, still chattered away on her cell phone, none the wiser as to how she'd almost thrown my car door into another vehicle.

More proof, as if it were needed, that 90% of the time the human race has not evolved far enough to successfully talk and chew gum at the same time...

Of course *WE* are exempt... aren't we, Gomer?

[vikingchyk]

She's yapping away on her phone as I pull to a stop-light. There's a right-turn lane next to me, and just as a car is approaching on the right in order to turn, my mother throws open the passenger-side door so she can reach behind the seat and grab the seat belt.

ugh, my mother would do this all the time, deciding the door wasn't quite closed all the way, so she would open and close it.

While the car was still moving.

Oh yeah, and she didn't wear a seat belt.

Oh yeah, and she was driving.

It's a major miracle I never ended up in a driverless car, careening down the road

[Caractacus_Potts]

I've wanted an air horn for years! Idiots have been around a lot longer than cell phones. Just imagine, the next some some brainless twit leaves their cart blocking the aisle, or a group of 14 people decide to stop and have a family reunion in the middle of an aisle.....BLAATTTTTT!! It would be lovely.

My wife has a horrible time in grocery stores and constantly complains about people getting in her way. I've rarely ever had a problem but I never really thought about it until she started complaining.

That's when I realized that when I am being polite (and I mean on my very best behavior) if your cart is blocking the isle for no reason I might say excuse me before I move it or push it out of the way with my cart and if a group of people are standing around chatting and blocking an isle I might say sorry when I brush up against a couple of them as I push my cart through the group without really slowing down.

I guess I'm just an a$$hole in these situations but on the bright side I rarely get frustrated.

[vikingchyk]

That's when I realized that when I am being polite (and I mean on my very best behavior) if your cart is blocking the isle for no reason I might say excuse me before I move it or push it out of the way with my cart #snip#

Years ago, my roommate and I were grocery shopping, and someone had left a cart smack dab in the middle of an aisle that was 2 carts wide. Since we had a cart, and I didn't see anyone around to ask if it was OK to move it, I just moved it, and remarked to my roomie that it was rude of whoever had left it like that.

We continue on around a corner, and the next thing I know, I am hit in the back of the legs with a cart! I turn around, and this woman starts berating me about daring to touch her cart and making smart remarks, how dare I say she's rude blargga! I basically tell her to chill out, I just moved it because it was blocking the way, and turn to continue on, and she rammed me again! I turned around, grab the cart, rammed it back into her, and told her "you hit me with this again, and we're going to find out how far I can ram it up your ass!!"

Not my finest moment, but OMG, really??? You're going to get that bent out of shape over something so trivial?? She took off after that, spouting "I'm going to kick your ass!" and the lady from the floral section (where all this happened) came over and said she was just about to call the cops, and she saw the whole thing if I still wanted her to and press charges against the kook.

Morale of the story: you never know when you're going to encounter a nut job. And sometimes you end up stooping to their level

Grocery rage? Really? Oy.

[telecom_goddess]

OOoooohhh if there is ONE thing I hate it's being rammed in the legs/ankles with a shopping cart. If someone ever does that to me I will reach my foot up and shove it backwards without looking first.

And I always have to deal with people who block the fucking way to everything in the grocery store. I've gone shopping at all different times and it never makes a difference it's still too crowded.