Stereotypical asshat is stereotypical

[Ophbalance]

Two to three times a day I walk around our office park. It's actually one of the nicer parts of my job as it's more or less condoned by management. In fact, most often times our leads and manager walk with us. Corporate really pushes the preventative health aspects available to us, and every one of us have pedometers to track steps that directly pay off in hundreds of dollars of health funds. We typically discuss issues and so it's like a walking status meeting between members of the team.

In getting around the park, we have to cross the main roads twice in order to follow the various sidewalks available. The very bottom part of the walk is the worst in terms of line of sight. But hey, it's a 30 MPH zone, it shouldn't be a problem right? Riiiiiight. I've got a picture of the view of the traffic we need to watch for as we cross the road to the right (off to the right of the picture). You need to listen intently, but you know, there's giant white crosswalk stripes that you cannot miss or not notice as you drive in every single day, right? Riiiiiight.



So I'm walking with my team lead and we're back behind the others. He's been diagnosed with Parkinson's and tends to walk slower now than when I first came on board a few years ago. It was a good day to chat though as he and I haven't really walked together for a few weeks. I'm probably about 20 years his junior, and as such, have an easier time picking up sounds of approaching vehicles. As we start across the crosswalk I hear that unmistakable sound of rubber on road and call out to wait. He was a bit deeper into the crossing than I, and so he started to back up.

And then we see a BMW come careening around that corner. Though he doesn't lock up the brakes, you can see the front end drop and he comes to a stop in the entrance of the intersection. At this point he waves us across. Honestly, I hate this. There's another lane and someone not paying attention is going to mow down a pedestrian by doing this. Regardless, we wave to the driver and resume our conversation and cross the road.

And that's where it just get's fucking weird. Now, you would think that if you truly had somewhere important to be, this next exchange would not happen. But it did.

So let's set this picture a little more clearly. The driver of the BMW looks to have a certain type vibe going for his appearance. A bit like Mystery Guitar Man from youtube (check him out if you've never heard of him. Very cool bloke). Now also imagine the voice this guy has. Like Hank Azaria's voice acting from the Hop movie. Everyone clear on that? With the voice, driving a stereotypical asshole car (those that cannot afford a Benz buy a BMW to keep up the image). Right, scene set then.

We're halfway across the intersection when we hear "HEY! Djou guys nau hear me?!!?!?!". It look me a step to register that someone is yelling at us, and I look around and just cannot believe this dude took the time out of his Very Important Schedule (TM) to bitch at us lowly peons. And this after he waved us on? Really? Well alrighty then!

My team lead, bless his heart, yells back "Yeah we hear you asshole!" and turns back around and starts walking. This sends dude into uber bitch fest tirade mode. He begins to inform us that next time he'll just run us down (with much interspersed cursing). I just give the guy a shit eating grin and a double thumbs up for "keep it classy asshole BMW guy... keep perpetuating that stereotype!" and also turn around and keep walking. My team lead and I look at each other and I ask "What the hell just happened there??". BMW asshat speeds off into the distance, passing some poor driver on the right that has passed on the left as asshat sat at the intersection. And the only means to do so would be doing WAY more than the posted 30 MPH calls for (lot's of turn offs and blind hills and curves). Oh, and let's not forget the crosswalk, which has not up and moved since I've been working there. That silly little traffic control device which is supposed to be for pedestrians crossing without fear of being hit and you should be cognizant that it's there if even 1/1000 of your brain registers such things as you blast through the park daily? Yeah. Stacy classy stereotypical dude, you sure showed us who's the one with the problem here.

My only regret is I didn't come up with a zinger on the spot. So far, my personal favorite is "Didn't we hear you? When did BMW install an 'ASSHOLE COMING THROUGH! I'M TOO IMPORTANT FOR YOUR RULES!' soundmaker? Oh wait, they did! And it's sitting in the driver's seat bitching at me RIGHT NOW!". So very sad that I couldn't use that at the time.

[wolfie]

I'm sure your office park gets deliveries from time to time, or has someone bring in new furniture and cube walls for a renovation. If the truck carrying this stuff is coming from right to left, asshole BMW driver would have the width of the left-to-right road less stopping distance - which probably wouldn't be enough. Thanks to his own engine noise, the trucker wouldn't be able to hear the entitlementmobile. If butthead manages to save up enough (or go deep enough in debt) to upgrade to the other car you mentioned, his encounter with the truck would just be the way the Mercedes bends.

[XCashier]

If he's a frequent flyer through the park, a notification to the local police might not be a bad idea. Station a motorcycle cop with a radar gun at that intersection and nail Mr. Big Shot next time he zooms through. That would deflate his ego PDQ.

[Ophbalance]

Wolfie> Tons of deliveries. And they've just added a sprawlingly huge block of "you've got to be kidding me!!" expensive apartments (like, the lowest is $800/mo). And there's still even more construction and all kinds of stone hauling trucks in and out of there. Plus tons of folks walk the paths (off to image right is a Double Tree Hotel). This dude will eventually find that karma catches up.

XCashier> I've never seen this dude before. But, it's probably a few dozen buildings and several more companies in the park. And now the added bonus of apartment dwellers to add to the fun. I regret not whipping out my phone and snagging his plate, but I was more concerned with being back on pavement that wasn't a road .

[wolfie]

but I was more concerned with being back on pavement that wasn't a road .

Of course the pavement isn't a road. As any of our British users would be able to tell you, pedestrians belong on the pavement - and anyone who drives there needs to get their license revoked.

[sms001]

just be the way the Mercedes bends.

grooooannnn.

[HawaiianShirts]

That silly little traffic control device which is supposed to be for pedestrians crossing without fear of being hit...

I've had encounters somewhat similar to this (though without the pompous yelling and swearing from the driver). In my home town, I didn't call them crosswalks. I called them cross-run-for-your-lifes. A car might stop for you if you're already crossing, but it will never stop to allow you to begin crossing, and I've seen some drivers just dodge to the next lane and whip on by to avoid a pedestrian. To this day, I can't use a crosswalk without feeling like a tortoise on a freeway.

[Deserted]

I've had encounters somewhat similar to this (though without the pompous yelling and swearing from the driver). In my home town, I didn't call them crosswalks. I called them cross-run-for-your-lifes. A car might stop for you if you're already crossing, but it will never stop to allow you to begin crossing, and I've seen some drivers just dodge to the next lane and whip on by to avoid a pedestrian. To this day, I can't use a crosswalk without feeling like a tortoise on a freeway.

I will jaywalk rather than trust drivers to stop for a crosswalk here.

It's so bad here that many places in Desert Hell are putting up special stoplights that are specifically for crosswalks.

[Chromatix]

It's so bad here that many places in Desert Hell are putting up special stoplights that are specifically for crosswalks.

Such things are very common on this side of the pond. In Britain the different types even have codenames:

A "zebra" crossing is an uncontrolled pedestrian crossing, marked with black-and-white stripes on the road and yellow flashing globes either side. These seem to be going out of fashion somewhat, but can still be found.

A "pelican" crossing is a controlled crossing separate from junction lights, with the red and green men mounted beside the traffic lights, facing across the crossing. There is a call-button, since the crossing is pedestrian-activated, and a "wait" lamp above it that indicates when the call button has been pressed. The light sequence is modified compared to normal traffic lights; instead of the red-and-yellow phase, there is a longer phase where the green man and the yellow light flash together; this tells pedestrians not to *start* crossing, and traffic to give way to pedestrians already crossing.

A "toucan" crossing is exactly like a "pelican", except that there is a cycle crossing in parallel with the pedestrian one. A "pegasus" crossing has a bridleway instead.

A "puffin" crossing is a controlled crossing with the red and green men mounted above the call-button instead of on the opposite side of the road. For reasons not adequately explained to me, this type uses the normal traffic-light sequence. The "do not start to cross" signal is given by simply reverting to the red man, some time before the traffic lights clear.

http://youtu.be/M9JQ0o5pwOY?t=5m18s

[SongsOfDragons]

Pegasus crossings can also have an extra button up at five-six feet or so - for the person on horseback, of course And many of those buttons have the sight-impaired revolving cone doobrie on the underneath too.

[Kit-Ginevra]

Or you have a funky little female on your lights

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedi..._-_Dresden.jpg

[Rock Lobster]

I came out of the post office one day and was standing at the end of the crosswalk waiting because no one ever stops for me. Mr. Idiot Driver flew past me standing there. Guess who was stopped at the red light? You guessed it right..........Mr. Policeman for the win!

[ADeMartino]

If he's a frequent flyer through the park, a notification to the local police might not be a bad idea. Station a motorcycle cop with a radar gun at that intersection and nail Mr. Big Shot next time he zooms through. That would deflate his ego PDQ.

Not so much, I fear. I hate to stereotype, but it seems to me that certain luxury/sports marques tend to attract some fairly arrogant individuals - and being owners of luxury/sports models, these individuals tend to come equipped with enough money that a typical traffic ticket is just pocket change to them, not even worth fighting in court unless it's a major violation like DUI or an actual accident.

[Ophbalance]

Eh, it's unlikely I'll ever see this toerag again. There's only one person in the park that I tend to notice, and he/she works for very popular graphics card maker and appears to belong the Sports Car of the Month (TM) club. Seriously, I don't know if this person owns them or rents them. Various Porsche models, a Tesla, Jags, Lamborghini, Ferrari have sat in that lot in the same spot as we walk by. Maybe he/she just owns one for each day of the week? Dunno, but they're nice to look at .

[bainsidhe]

The attitude of blaming the pedestrian really bugs me in this type of situation. I mean, our city is full of people jay-walking, crossing without looking (usually illegally) and doing other dangerous things without paying attention to oncoming traffic. It warms my bitter heart when I see pedestrians paying attention to traffic and trying not to become roadkill.

A few years back, a friend of mine and her coworker were crossing the street when they had the "go" light. An SUV was turning, didn't see them, and ran into the coworker. Afterwards the driver claimed coworker intentionally ran in front of the car trying to get hit. So then coworker had to fight a-hole's insurance company to pay medical bills. Not only was this during rush hour and there were numbers witnesses, but this coworker has medical problems and walked with a cane. She couldn't even walk fast, yet she supposedly sprinted and launched herself in front of an SUV to be ran over, worsen her already-existing issues, and possibly die.