Figure it out BEFORE you come in!!

[downforit2008]

I ordered a rum runner on the rocks from my favorite little hole in the wall bar a couple weeks ago. The bartender that night was new and screwed it up completely, but she managed to screw it up in a way that it wound up being a fantastic drink. The next time I went into that bar, I asked her to recreate the screwed up drink. She's new, so she struggled a bit, but she got close. This is pretty much the only time I've ever asked a bartender to make "that drink that you did last week" in my life.

I went to a Subway once and ordered a tuna fish footlong sub. The manager who was making it must have been frazzled and exhausted with a lot on his mind because he ended up putting MUSTARD on my tuna footlong! I saw the mistake, said nothing, and figured, "Ehhh, I'll try it just this once!" I ate the sandwich and it tasted AWESOME! The next morning, the manager saw me pass by his store and he somehow remembered what he did because he apologized for his mustard mistake.

I said, "What do you got to say sorry for? It tasted EXCELLENT! Be sure to put some more mustard on my next order of tuna fish again!"
He laughed, and he did put mustard on my next order. It must have made him feel good that he could make a mistake and not get yelled at by a customer for it, but is complimented for it instead.

[wolfie]

Couple of "mystery drinks" (one fictional, one real - and from what I've read in bartender's guides, the real one is AWFUL):

- Horse's Ass
- World Peace

[dalesys]

- Horse's Ass

Tom Hauptman's drink. Garnished with a fly by Mike.

(If I managed to resurrect the right bits from the bucket, that is)

[wolfie]

Tom Hauptman's drink. Garnished with a fly by Mike.

Yep, Tom Hauptman did order the Horse's Ass, but what are the ingredients?

[Pixilated]

I did something like this today -- somebody wanted a particular drink and without thinking, I made the 'iced' version, not the hot version. I apologized and went to re-make it, but she said, "Wait, let me try the iced version." Turned out she really, really loved it. *phew* LOL

[Jester]

Basically you take the mat off the floor and drain all the liquid on it into a glass.

I've seen (and done) mat shots, but not from the floor. You know the bar mats that are in the bar, where the bartender mixes up the drinks? Yeah, a mat shot is when the bartender picks up said mat and drains the liquid from that, a combination of Who Knows What and Oh Hell No, straight into a shot glass.

Yes, I said I've drank those. I didn't say I LIKED them, mind you...but I have drank them.

[Ironclad Alibi]

I have a copy of the book So Red The Nose, or Breath in the Afternoon. This 1935 edition has 35 drink recipes by famous authors such as Ernest Hemingway, Erskine Caldwell and Edgar Rice Burroughs. The first 34 are drinkable. The 35th, by Theodore Dreiser, is below.

American Tragedy Cocktail

1 teaspoonful nitroglycerin
1 tablespoonful heavy ground gunpowder
2 jiggers ethyl gasoline
1 lighted match

Please accompany the above by horrific series of eccentricities, aversions and drinking habits, all based upon my notorious and incurable alcoholism.

"In case I deny, any American Publisher or Movie Picture Corporation will verify.

Truthfully,
Theodore Dreiser"

(Editor's note: After several of these, Benito Mussolini is said to have offered a toast which sounded strangely like "Hail, Haile Selassi!" Benito, however, usually adds a touch of mustard gas which greatly improves the flavor.)

After reading through the book, I do have wonder about their strange sense of humor back then.

[ShinyGreenApple]

"I need my refill but I don't know what the medication is called. It's a little white round pill."

Because that narrows it down SO MUCH.

My Mom is the queen of doing this at fast food restaurants though. Instead of letting the person behind her go, she'll go right up to the counter and then stand there and "Um" and "Hmm, uhhh" for about three minutes, while asking the cashier questions that wouldn't be necessary if only she'd read the menu.

And speaking of drinks, a friend of mine used to make something he called a Painkiller when he tended for the local gay bar. It was delicious and two of them were enough to get me sufficiently tipsy and loud. He never would tell anyone what he put in them, so you could only get them when he was working he also did something called a Dirty Springwater, too, but it wasn't quite as good.

[Jester]

Can't comment on your friend's drink, but a Painkiller is made with dark rum (usually Gosling's Black Seal), and ginger beer, which is a nonalcoholic soda....sort of a ginger ale steroids.

[Dentarthurdent]

Can't comment on your friend's drink, but a Painkiller is made with dark rum (usually Gosling's Black Seal), and ginger beer, which is a nonalcoholic soda....sort of a ginger ale steroids.

So the difference between that and Dark 'n Stormy? Is it that the Painkiller has no ice, or are there different proportions?

[fireheart]

I've seen (and done) mat shots, but not from the floor. You know the bar mats that are in the bar, where the bartender mixes up the drinks? Yeah, a mat shot is when the bartender picks up said mat and drains the liquid from that, a combination of Who Knows What and Oh Hell No, straight into a shot glass.

Yes, I said I've drank those. I didn't say I LIKED them, mind you...but I have drank them.

OK, that's gross.

[Jester]

So the difference between that and Dark 'n Stormy? Is it that the Painkiller has no ice, or are there different proportions?

No, the difference is that I'm a freakin' IDIOT.

The drink I described is, in fact, the Dark & Stormy, not the Painkiller. Both are served over ice, and both use rum, but that is where the similarities end.

The Painkiller, as I know it, is rum (preferably Pusser's British Navy Rum), cream of coconut, orange juice, and pineapple juice, and garnished with ground nutmeg on top.

You would think after making both drinks for this many years, I would know the difference between the two. Which is why, of course, I'm a freakin' idiot.

[sms001]

I've seen (and done) mat shots,

BT,DT. It was a punishment/hazing at a bar I worked.

On the lighter side, and usually VERY tasty, i had the bright idea one night to put an Igloo cooler (like at a construction site for water) next to the blender station. We'd toss all the remainders of the shaken foo-foos (whatever was left in the shaker cup after pouring off) into it through the course of the night. Couple of big scoops of ice, pop on the lid, and voila; instant after-party punch. We called it 'Red Drink' and it was cheap and effective.

[Bardmaiden]

My fiancé tells a tale of his 21st birthday (I met him when he was 25) of a drink that was made for him mostly as a dare which was as I recall a shot of everything behind that bar, which ended up a muddy brown colour. Him and his best friend J had one, J got very drunk very quickly....

My fiancé went on to have three more and went to work the next day. This may have been the same time as him realising that he had sprained his ankle about six hours into his shift.

The thing is these days he would be on the floor himself, as due to his job he barely drinks alcohol (tested regularly and would be on probation/dismissed if found with alcohol in the system).

[Jester]

...due to his job he barely drinks alcohol (tested regularly and would be on probation/dismissed if found with alcohol in the system).

What does he do? I ask so that I can make sure I never, ever, EVER, apply for such a position.