The Psychology of a Sucky Customer (longish)

[HawaiianShirts]

This one comes second-hand from my wife (K) who works in our university's testing center. It involves more of a Sucky Student (SS) than a Sucky Customer.

SS: I need a test.
K: Which test?
SS: It's Psychology from Dr. Hill.
K: Dr. Hill has six tests going on now. Which class are you in?
SS: (Big Sigh!) Psychological Measurements.

So K goes through the process of obtaining ID number and photo ID and entering SS's information into the computer, then goes to the files to find the test. The psych drawer had been recently reorganized, so it took her just a little longer than usual. All through this, SS is sighing and tapping her foot impatiently. K finally gets the test, signs SS in for it, and hands it to her. SS snatches the test away and walks into the testing room in a huff.

About half an hour later, SS returns with her completed test and hands it to my wife's co-worker at the check-out desk. Then she comes back up to the check-in desk.

SS: Now I need the MMPI-2 (a personality test left by Dr. Hill for his students to take and score).
K: Can do. Can I have your ID number again?
SS: Why? Did you lose it?
K: *blink* No, the computer clears it as soon as I finish checking a student in.
SS: (Big Sigh) Fine. It's 00112233.
K: (Retrieves the test, which is in a large folder, and hands it to SS) There you go. The test is on the green pages, and the scoring sheets are in the smaller red folder.
SS: I don't need the whole thing! I've already taken the test. I just need the scoring sheets!
K: Oh. Okay. You can just take this red folder, then.
SS: Gah. Why are you being so bitchy? It's not that HARD!

SS grabs her red folder and goes to score her test. K went outside to blow off a little steam.

After hearing that story, I got to thinking about some of my customers. I have had some who accuse me of acting a certain way or having a certain disposition, when I would say that they are describing themselves far more accurately than they are describing me. I don't think I'm the only one to notice this either... am I?

And I know there is a term in the study of psychology used to describe this phenomenon, but I can't remember what it is. Something in my brain wants to call it "displacement," which sort of works for a description, but I know that's not it. Can anybody else remember it?

[habitofbeingright]

it could be projection . She is projecting upon you her faults that haunt her?

[MystyGlyttyr]

It's projection. Example taken from Wikipedia:

To understand the process, imagine an individual (Alice, for example) who feels dislike for another person (let's say Bob), but whose unconscious mind will not allow her to become aware of this negative emotion. Instead of admitting to herself that she feels dislike for Bob, she projects her dislike onto Bob, so that her conscious thought is not "I don't like Bob," but "Bob doesn't like me." In this way one can see that projection is related to denial, the only defense mechanism, some argue, that is more primitive than projection. Alice has denied a part of herself that is desperate to come to the surface. She can't flatly admit that she doesn't like Bob, so instead she will project the dislike, thinking Bob doesn't like her. Another, rather humorous, example is if Alice were to say, "Bob seems to project his feelings onto me."

Or, when I break down and analyze my own feelings of aggression and paranoia towards other people...

"An individual who possesses malicious characteristics, but who is unwilling to perceive himself as an antagonist, convinces himself that his opponent feels and would act the same way."

Although I've come to terms with my own inherent maliciousness so I no longer think EVERYONE in the world is evil. Now I know it's all on me.

[Bonnie Bitch]

After hearing that story, I got to thinking about some of my customers. I have had some who accuse me of acting a certain way or having a certain disposition, when I would say that they are describing themselves far more accurately than they are describing me. I don't think I'm the only one to notice this either... am I?

And I know there is a term in the study of psychology used to describe this phenomenon, but I can't remember what it is. Something in my brain wants to call it "displacement," which sort of works for a description, but I know that's not it. Can anybody else remember it?

It's called projection -- attributing one's own attitudes, beliefs, and/or behaviors to another person as a source of blame for one's troubles.
I have a great analogy involving the "Great Gay Marriage Debate," but I can't talk about it without engaging my potty mouth.

At any rate, the bitch in your story was the SS, not your wife. The SS was projecting her bitchiness on K and then blaming K as the source of SS's troubles at that moment. That's a textbook example of projection.
If I had been in K's spot, I would have snatched that red folder back and booted the little bitch for use of vulgarity directed at me eprsonally. Then I would have e-mailed my supervisor AND the SS's prof AND the SS's student advisor, to let them all know what a <loud car horn> the SS was.

[Buglady]

Apparently before one becomes a certified psychologist in some jurisdictions, one has to take a series of personality tests to make sure one is stable enough to work as a psychologist and not damage other people. Sounds like that needs to be bumped back to the undergrad level...

(I'm in undergrad psych - but I'm a returning student and I'm about 12 years older than most of my classmates)

[SnapAddict218]

Projection indeed.