It never ceases to amaze me how often customers will ask for help in finding something when they can't name the item, and they can't describe it! Seriously!! I can't do anything for you if you can't communicate the most basic information!! Yet, they still expect my help in finding it. It blows my mind.
So, I'm working on the sales floor, and this agitated man walks up to me rather quickly.
Man: Thee pens! Thee pens! Where are thee pens!
I wasn't sure at first what he was asking for. He kept saying he wanted 'pens,' but the 'thee' thru me off and made me think I was misunderstanding him. I was thinking maybe he had an accent, or speech problem.
Me: You mean pens? Like, to write with? They're in the stationary aisle, number ##.
Man: No! No! No! You know, thee pens, thee pens!
Me: I'm really sorry. I'm not sure what you are looking for.
Man: Thee pens. Thee pens. You know, they're for....like....you put....it's for.....well they're for.....I'm picking them up for someone, and they're.....thee pens!
At this point, I don't hear any obvious accent or speech problem. Every word he said was clear and understandable. His English was perfect, except for 'thee pens.'
Me: I don't know what you mean by 'thee pens'. Can you describe it for me? That would help.
At this point, a passing CW stops and joins us.
Man: Thee pens. Thee pens.
CW: Pens?. They're on aisle ## with the stationary.
Man: No! No!!! Thee pens!! They're for like...... well you put them.....you wear them for.....
As he is saying this, he's motioning a lot with his hands trying to describe the item. He tucks on his waistband, like he's pulling his pants up.
Man: Like this! You know!
CW: Sorry. I don't know what you mean. Say it again?
Man: THEE PENS!! (He's starting to sound upset now.)
Me: You mean, 'Depends'? Like diapers?
Man: Yeah!! Yeah!! That's it!! Thee pens!! Thee pens! Where are they? I can't find them.
(For those that might not know, Depends are a brand of adult diapers.)
Me: Depends are on the diaper aisle, number ##.
CW and I both agreed that he never said 'Depends.' We both heard 'thee pens' each time. Even after we said 'Depends', he kept saying 'thee pens'. Holy crap. All he had to do was say 'diapers'.
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Still Waw Beer
Apparently, it was the night for idiot mispronunciation. Later, I got a guy asking for 'Still waw' beer. I've never heard of 'Still waw' beer, and I'm fairly familiar with all the beers we carry, including the seemingly endless number of specialty micro-brews that we keep adding and dropping.
I must have asked the guy to repeat it six or seven times.
"Still Waw....Still Waw....Still Waw."
Now, if he was just mispronouncing it, I wouldn't be too annoyed. But he was deliberately trying to pronounce the name as though he was fluent in some foreign language. Each time he said the name, he would stop and then quickly roll thru the beer's name in an exaggerated accent. He insisted he bought it here before. I spent about ten minutes searching the back room, the sales floor, and calling other clerks asking them if they knew of a beer called "Still Waw." Of course, no one had ever heard of this beer. I finally gave up. I found the guy standing by a liquor display. I started to tell him I couldn't find his beer.
Beer Guy: Oh, that's all right! I found some right here! Thanks anyway!
I look, and in his cart is a case of Stella Artois Beer. Stella Artois!!! I don't know how the hell he got 'Still Waw' from Stella Artois.
So, I'm working on the sales floor, and this agitated man walks up to me rather quickly.
Man: Thee pens! Thee pens! Where are thee pens!
I wasn't sure at first what he was asking for. He kept saying he wanted 'pens,' but the 'thee' thru me off and made me think I was misunderstanding him. I was thinking maybe he had an accent, or speech problem.
Me: You mean pens? Like, to write with? They're in the stationary aisle, number ##.
Man: No! No! No! You know, thee pens, thee pens!
Me: I'm really sorry. I'm not sure what you are looking for.
Man: Thee pens. Thee pens. You know, they're for....like....you put....it's for.....well they're for.....I'm picking them up for someone, and they're.....thee pens!
At this point, I don't hear any obvious accent or speech problem. Every word he said was clear and understandable. His English was perfect, except for 'thee pens.'
Me: I don't know what you mean by 'thee pens'. Can you describe it for me? That would help.
At this point, a passing CW stops and joins us.
Man: Thee pens. Thee pens.
CW: Pens?. They're on aisle ## with the stationary.
Man: No! No!!! Thee pens!! They're for like...... well you put them.....you wear them for.....
As he is saying this, he's motioning a lot with his hands trying to describe the item. He tucks on his waistband, like he's pulling his pants up.
Man: Like this! You know!
CW: Sorry. I don't know what you mean. Say it again?
Man: THEE PENS!! (He's starting to sound upset now.)
Me: You mean, 'Depends'? Like diapers?
Man: Yeah!! Yeah!! That's it!! Thee pens!! Thee pens! Where are they? I can't find them.
(For those that might not know, Depends are a brand of adult diapers.)
Me: Depends are on the diaper aisle, number ##.
CW and I both agreed that he never said 'Depends.' We both heard 'thee pens' each time. Even after we said 'Depends', he kept saying 'thee pens'. Holy crap. All he had to do was say 'diapers'.
-----------------
Still Waw Beer
Apparently, it was the night for idiot mispronunciation. Later, I got a guy asking for 'Still waw' beer. I've never heard of 'Still waw' beer, and I'm fairly familiar with all the beers we carry, including the seemingly endless number of specialty micro-brews that we keep adding and dropping.
I must have asked the guy to repeat it six or seven times.
"Still Waw....Still Waw....Still Waw."
Now, if he was just mispronouncing it, I wouldn't be too annoyed. But he was deliberately trying to pronounce the name as though he was fluent in some foreign language. Each time he said the name, he would stop and then quickly roll thru the beer's name in an exaggerated accent. He insisted he bought it here before. I spent about ten minutes searching the back room, the sales floor, and calling other clerks asking them if they knew of a beer called "Still Waw." Of course, no one had ever heard of this beer. I finally gave up. I found the guy standing by a liquor display. I started to tell him I couldn't find his beer.
Beer Guy: Oh, that's all right! I found some right here! Thanks anyway!
I look, and in his cart is a case of Stella Artois Beer. Stella Artois!!! I don't know how the hell he got 'Still Waw' from Stella Artois.
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