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I've decided that old people are awkward.
Elderly women in particular.
By awkward, I mean...
Story1) Projectiles
I work at a hardware store. It's pretty spiffy, because we sell flowers and gifts too. Sometimes we do giftwrapping, sometimes we don't. It depends on the time of year, really. Currently, we're not.
Enter Eldery Lady, buying a stuffed animal for her granddaughter.
A(noki): Me!
EL: Elderly Lady
A: Hello! How are you today (etc, usualy shpiel)
EL: Will you wrap this for me? (She shoves the toy in my face)
A: I'm sorry ma'am, we don't have any wrapping paper in the back room.
EL: That's a lie! You kids always wrap things!
A: I'm really sorry, I don't know what else to tell you. We're just not doing giftwrapping this week.
Now at this point, I should mention that by each cash register is a dish of tootsie rolls and candies, as well as a bowl of cookies. EL promptly take a handful of candies and THROWS them at me, complaining about how she's going to have to show up to a family dinner without the present wrapped. I just sort of stood there, becuase never in my life did i think that I would ever have an 80 year old lady throw things at me. She left a minute later, when the dish was empty.
Story 2, for which I have no title
For reasons yet unknown to me, customers tend to wander the store and then rush the register all at once. Today, I was the only person on reg. We're a little understaffed.
During one of the rushes, a line of 5 people forms. 5 ansty people. In the front is another elderly lady. She's buying a bunch of cups and towels and gardening shovels and whatnot. Her total was around fifty dollars.
EL2: Are you up for a challenge, dear?
A: (Why not, I'll play along.) Yes ma'am. What can I do for you today?
EL2: (Pulls out a HUGE stack of bills. Mostly 1's, with some 20's and 10's and 5's) I'm going to pay you in singles
A: (Notices the other 4 people shifting anxiously in line). Errr, ok?
The lady starts counting out bills slowly. As she comes across any larger bills, she replaces them into her purse. We're at 26 when she knocks something off the counters. She loses count. I think I'm going to snap. She asks for change for a 5. Sure?
I hand her the singles, which she ADDS to the pile of (now) 43 one-dollar bills on the counter and I can't believe I fell for that. By now, people in line start laughing or yelling for us to get a move on. Really, aside from counting for her, there's nothing more I can do.
After over 10 minutes of this nonsense, I get her through. It was annoying. It was tedious. It made me cranky.
Story Three: Not pertaining to elderly women.
I am trilingual (almost). I know English, Spanish, and a fair amount of Hebrew. I generally dislike speaking anything other than english, because I have the embarrassing habit of mixing the other two languages together. It sounds silly, really.
At one point today, I was behind the regsiter on my knees, sorting 141 eyeglasses into bins by their strength. Two landscapers (hispanic) come up to the register to pay for some dirt and flowers they've picked up. No prob! I like landscapers. They're very down to earth, mostly. So I'm printing out the house charge for them, and I hear one say to the other, in Spanish: "That's where she belongs, on her knees." The other laughs and winks at me when I come back to ask them to sign the charge.
I want to scream. I'm a feminist. Probably radically so. I'd also like to keep my job, as I need money for my meals in college in the fall. End result, I bite my lip and wish them a good day, and safe driving IN SPANISH.
They laugh more and leave.
Elderly women in particular.
By awkward, I mean...
Story1) Projectiles
I work at a hardware store. It's pretty spiffy, because we sell flowers and gifts too. Sometimes we do giftwrapping, sometimes we don't. It depends on the time of year, really. Currently, we're not.
Enter Eldery Lady, buying a stuffed animal for her granddaughter.
A(noki): Me!
EL: Elderly Lady
A: Hello! How are you today (etc, usualy shpiel)
EL: Will you wrap this for me? (She shoves the toy in my face)
A: I'm sorry ma'am, we don't have any wrapping paper in the back room.
EL: That's a lie! You kids always wrap things!
A: I'm really sorry, I don't know what else to tell you. We're just not doing giftwrapping this week.
Now at this point, I should mention that by each cash register is a dish of tootsie rolls and candies, as well as a bowl of cookies. EL promptly take a handful of candies and THROWS them at me, complaining about how she's going to have to show up to a family dinner without the present wrapped. I just sort of stood there, becuase never in my life did i think that I would ever have an 80 year old lady throw things at me. She left a minute later, when the dish was empty.
Story 2, for which I have no title
For reasons yet unknown to me, customers tend to wander the store and then rush the register all at once. Today, I was the only person on reg. We're a little understaffed.
During one of the rushes, a line of 5 people forms. 5 ansty people. In the front is another elderly lady. She's buying a bunch of cups and towels and gardening shovels and whatnot. Her total was around fifty dollars.
EL2: Are you up for a challenge, dear?
A: (Why not, I'll play along.) Yes ma'am. What can I do for you today?
EL2: (Pulls out a HUGE stack of bills. Mostly 1's, with some 20's and 10's and 5's) I'm going to pay you in singles
A: (Notices the other 4 people shifting anxiously in line). Errr, ok?
The lady starts counting out bills slowly. As she comes across any larger bills, she replaces them into her purse. We're at 26 when she knocks something off the counters. She loses count. I think I'm going to snap. She asks for change for a 5. Sure?
I hand her the singles, which she ADDS to the pile of (now) 43 one-dollar bills on the counter and I can't believe I fell for that. By now, people in line start laughing or yelling for us to get a move on. Really, aside from counting for her, there's nothing more I can do.
After over 10 minutes of this nonsense, I get her through. It was annoying. It was tedious. It made me cranky.
Story Three: Not pertaining to elderly women.
I am trilingual (almost). I know English, Spanish, and a fair amount of Hebrew. I generally dislike speaking anything other than english, because I have the embarrassing habit of mixing the other two languages together. It sounds silly, really.
At one point today, I was behind the regsiter on my knees, sorting 141 eyeglasses into bins by their strength. Two landscapers (hispanic) come up to the register to pay for some dirt and flowers they've picked up. No prob! I like landscapers. They're very down to earth, mostly. So I'm printing out the house charge for them, and I hear one say to the other, in Spanish: "That's where she belongs, on her knees." The other laughs and winks at me when I come back to ask them to sign the charge.
I want to scream. I'm a feminist. Probably radically so. I'd also like to keep my job, as I need money for my meals in college in the fall. End result, I bite my lip and wish them a good day, and safe driving IN SPANISH.
They laugh more and leave.
You handled it well, but I think something along the lines of "...and I don't appreciate being spoken about like that" would've been appropriate.
). But to ask for change for a larger bill just so she can give you all singles...?!?! That's just ridiculous! Most people with a lot of change were little kids emptying out their piggy banks. Then the parent stands there and lets Junior count it all out on the counter they can barely see over. I'm all for teaching kids how to handle money and all that but count it out on your own time or take them to the bank to get bills instead of holding up my line!
I had passengers say things like that to me and I could never hold my tongue.
deserve a nice slooooooow trip through the 
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