Fire Alarm Fun! (bit long)

[Lace Neil Singer]

I think we should be able to have a couple of collies delivered to the store in the event of a fire, to herd the idiots to the door. -__-

Remember a fire alarm in *supermarket*; we're linked to a department store, and the fire was in that shop. It was in the end just an electrical fault, but we still had to evacuate. Took us bloody forever to herd all the cretins bleating, "But I haven't finished shopping yet!" We. Don't. Care. Just shift your fat arse out of the building NOW!!!

[tamezin]

Let 'em Burn

They continued to shop even though you couldn't even hear Pavarotti sing with the alarm being so loud. It was sheer madness! And all the frowns and "tuts" and foot stomping was enough to make you puke!

These are the people who are too stupid to be allowed to procreate. Let 'em Burn leaving the gene pool that much cleaner for future generations.

[JustaCashier]

In the event of fire cinema employees have to go into the auditorium, point to the fire door, and shout, 'This way please!'

Just don't actually yell "FIRE!!" That's against the law.

*Ducks*

Mike

[digilight]

The way I see it theres a couple of ways to get the IQ Deficiant members of society out of your store during a fire or fire drill (remember these may work better during actuall fire/crisis situation )

1. whisper that their may be discount coupons being handed out in the parking lot for the next 42 seconds. Asshats here discount and go running like the wind.

You can either just refuse to give them discounts now that they are out....or give them a 1cent discount or something stupid like that.

2. Walk in...scream at the top of your lungs....GET THE FUCK OUT YOU FUCKING FUCKS....THERES A FUCKING FIRE AND YOU"RE ALL GOING TO FUCKING DIE....

3. Or you can take bets with your coworkers as to which fools will make it out...and which ones will lose the race with uncle flamey. Yup its kinda racing cockroaches (only the roaches are smarter)...

2.

[JustAGirl]

I like the idea of sprinklers, or better yet, hail.

[Rapscallion]

ATLAS MAN:
He was just standing, reading an atlas from the shelf,

I have this mental image of him musing idly, "Hey, in this latest edition, Poland's moved down next to Spain. How about that?"

Rapscallion

[cinema guy]

Just don't actually yell "FIRE!!" That's against the law.

*Ducks*

Mike

Yeah, we wouldn't want to cause panic. We can't use 'fire' on the radio, instead we use 'Mr Alert'.

[WHShit]

Ugh, I get the same sort of thing with our property management clients. Whenever a fire alarm goes off people call in to A) Ask what the alarm is for, B) Ask if should do anything or my fav C) Call me to bitch that its going off and tell me to shut it off.

News flash: GET. OUT. OF. BUILDING. Fire BAD.

You know I have a friend in England with diplomatic immunity and he can get it extended to me if I travel with him. If I ever visit London I'm going to come to your store and just kick someone in the ass as hard as possible. A good running punt if there's enough space in an aisle.

He'll lose the immunity pretty fast when his superior's hear of it, but it'll be worth it.

If you ever visit, you, Raps and I can paint the town red (with the blood of the customers, of course)!

[BookstoreEscapee]

The store my ex works at had a fire not too long after he started there. A light in the newsstand shorted out and set the (wooden) shelf on fire. Of course the magazines started to catch. So one of the employees calls him and another goes for the fire extinguisher while he and a couple other people are tossing magazines out of the fixture by the armful in hopes of keeping it from going up like kindling. They put the fire out with the extinguisher before the fire dept got there but they had to evacuate and close for a few hours. They decided to just toss all the magazines that were covered in fire extinguisher powder and take the loss on them rather than go through the cartful to see what was salvageable. They had to have the whole fixture replaced. Oddly enough, I don't think they had too much trouble with customers...

The building I work in is only a couple years old and they are just now getting their fire evacuation plan sorted out. We had a drill a month or so ago, which no one knew what was going on and in the warehouse you can barely hear it. Then a couple weeks ago they accidentally set off the alarm while doing testing or something because they forgot to disable all the bells (so only some of them went off). Tomorrow we are having a scheduled drill...our exit is at one end of the warehouse just below our office, but there is a fence out there with a locked gate...so we will have to walk aaallll the way around the back of the building, past the guard house on the opposite end, across the front to the far side of the parking lot to our department's meeting spot...which is probably a few hundred yards from the door through which we will be exiting...gotta love corporate efficiency...it extends to everything!

*to give you an idea of how long a walk this is, one of their favorite stats to tell visitors is that you can lay the Empire State Building down in the warehouse...

[Kiwi]

Your all much better employees than I am... I would usher people out until I saw smoke...

then its every kiwi for herself

[zelper]

I'll see your fire stories and raise em.

I work on the London Underground. It has electrical rails which run the trains. Sometimes either the rails or the trains will overheat. Not usually resulting in visible flames but certainly it can get smoky if the motors are on fire. It's rare and usually it's quickly dealt with but obviously it's not a desireable situation.

Time and again I hear other drivers saying that there was a problem with the train but NOBODY thought to tell him. I mean, you are sitting in a train 70feet below the earth's surface, with no obvious safe means of escape wouldn't you try to alert the driver? ....but they'd rather sit there and cough than alert the driver to the fact that the car is filled with smoke. And that's not hyperbole - staff have walked into trains where they can barely see for smoke and passengers are just sitting there waiting for somebody else to pull the emergency handle. Sheesh.

[RebeccaOTool]

If people are to dumb to leave a buring building, maybe they should just stay there. Darwinism and all that.

[Starlord]

The people who resist leaving a building where the fire alarm is blaring is called the Darwin Principle. It demonstrates a flaw in the survival instinct mechanism that causes the person to attempt to improve the human gene pool by eliminating themselves from it in the most bizarre methods they can find. This condition is most prevalent in people who engage in activities such as the ones seen on the television series 'Jackass.' There is an annual award ceremony called the Darwin Awards where said awards are given for the most spectacular means of improving the human gene pool. The awards, of course, are posthumous.

[Andara Bledin]

The awards, of course, are posthumous.

Not always. Very very rarely you will get someone of such delightful stupidity that they successfully remove themselves from the gene pool, and then get to live in infamy ever after.

^-.-^

[dalejrfan71]

skimmin' the gene pool

If these morons are too stupid to get out in the event of a fire, screw 'em, save yourself. Is it worth killing yourself because some dipshit can't realize that the fire alarm means FIRE!!!!!