The bookstore: a breeding ground for idiots!

[Marxfan]

People always assume that bookstores are breeding ground for intellectuals. Boy they couldn't be more wrong...

SC: What's Ernest Hemingway's latest book?
Me: (Ready to gnaw my arm off in feral disgust, as Hemingway has been dead since 1961)

SC: Do you have the latest James Bond book in the series?
Me: You mean the last?
SC: The latest.
Me: (Again disgusted, as Ian Fleming is also long since deceased!!)

Stupid teenager: Ummm, I'm looking for, um, Moby Dick, by... Dickens?

(Moby Dick was written by Herman Melville, you moron!!)

Ghetto junior idiot: I'm looking for this book!
Me: Okay, what's it called?
GJI: I don't know!
Me: Who's the author?
GJI: It's about the mama beating up on her kid!
(I was beating myself up over this potentially nonexistent book and the kid eventually left).

[ShootMePlease]

GJI: It's about the mama beating up on her kid!

It was probably "A Child Called It" by Dave Pelzer. It apparently has become required reading in school, and rightfully so. Makes you think twice about bitching about your own life....

[draggar]

People are breeding in the book stores? I should go there more often!

[cinema guy]

SC: Do you have the latest James Bond book in the series?
Me: You mean the last?
SC: The latest.
Me: (Again disgusted, as Ian Fleming is also long since deceased!!)

Well I hate to tell you this, but there have been several authours who have continued to write Bond.

In 1968, Colonel Sun was written by Robert Markham (a pen name for Kingsley Amis IIRC).

Then in 1981 thriller writter John Gardner began a stint, starting with Licence Renewed. They started well but went downhill.

The next author was Raymond Benson, but his latest offering was about 4 years ago. He should have stuck to writing Bond fact books.

Now Charlie Higson is writing the Young Bond series. I have not read any of these but the idea makes me

[mariamousie1]

GJI: It's about the mama beating up on her kid!

It was probably "A Child Called It" by Dave Pelzer. It apparently has become required reading in school, and rightfully so. Makes you think twice about bitching about your own life....

That was the first thing I thought of too. Very interesting but sad book.

Look at it this way, at least these people are trying to improve their nonexistent IQ's!

[Marxfan]

Look at it this way, at least these people are trying to improve their nonexistent IQ's!

Curses! Darn you and your perspective! I kid, I kid. I guess that's a good way of looking at it, but I'm such a cynical bitch these days. I dunno, maybe I'll get over it once I find a non-retail job.

Quoth Deanna Darkstone
SC: Do you have the latest James Bond book in the series?
Me: You mean the last?
SC: The latest.
Me: (Again disgusted, as Ian Fleming is also long since deceased!!)


Well I hate to tell you this, but there have been several authours who have continued to write Bond.

In 1968, Colonel Sun was written by Robert Markham (a pen name for Kingsley Amis IIRC).

Then in 1981 thriller writter John Gardner began a stint, starting with Licence Renewed. They started well but went downhill.

The next author was Raymond Benson, but his latest offering was about 4 years ago. He should have stuck to writing Bond fact books.

Now Charlie Higson is writing the Young Bond series. I have not read any of these but the idea makes me

Aw, man, I'm such a dummy. I'll go stand in the corner now...

People are breeding in the book stores? I should go there more often!

Don't be surprised, it's probably happening at some bookstore somewhere!

My brain isn't working today. Best to just pay me no mind.
__________________

[DGoddessChardonnay]

GJI: It's about the mama beating up on her kid!

It was probably "A Child Called It" by Dave Pelzer. It apparently has become required reading in school, and rightfully so. Makes you think twice about bitching about your own life....

I actually have a copy of that . . . I'm just disturbed by the thought of reading it though, which may be why I haven't read it yet.

There again, he could have been asking for "Mommie Dearest." Which is another harrowing tale of abuse.

[BookstoreEscapee]

A lot of schools here have A Child Called It on their summer reading lists. Most of them come in asking for A Boy Called It, and when it first began showing up on all the lists I would always forget that it was "Child" and could never find it in the computer.

[Dark Psion]

Look at it this way, at least these people are trying to improve their nonexistent IQ's!

Zero times anything is still Zero.

All you will end up with is an educated idiot and I get far too many of those at the hardware store.

[Imogene]

Zero times anything is still Zero.

Ah yes, but you don't multiply your IQ, you add to it. Zero plus anything is anything.

[EclipseDragon986]

Now you know. And knowing is half the battle!

The other half is doing. Doing sucks.

[ArenaBoy]

I have a friend who works in a Borders and she had one gripe when The War of The Worlds was a movie (Spielberg). They were doing a promotion on the book when two teenage girls look at the display and ask "That movie is based off a book?" "There's no way it can be!"

And yes A Child Called It is one of the most disturbing books I've ever read.

[Hon'ya-chan]

Reminded of this doozie.

SC: Do you have Monster?
Me: Um, Author?
SC: Dunno.
Me: Subject?
SC: Dunno.
Me: Unless you can provide either the author or the subject, I cannot help you further.
SC: What? But I want Monster!!
Me: Manga?
SC: What?
Me: Is what your looking for a Comic Book?
SC: I don't want a fucking comic book!!
At this point, the manager warned the lady to keep her explatives to nil.
Me: Peretti? Young Adult?
SC: Do I look like a fucking.....
Manager warned the lady again to keep her explatives to nil.
SC: Okay, does it look like I want a teenagers book?
Me: Kellerman? Mystery?
SC at this point is frustrated, gives up, and leaves. But not before saying a few choice words.

[Kogarashi]

[QUOTE=ArenaBoy;158597]I have a friend who works in a Borders and she had one gripe when The War of The Worlds was a movie (Spielberg). They were doing a promotion on the book when two teenage girls look at the display and ask "That movie is based off a book?" "There's no way it can be!"[QUOTE]

My last semester at undergrad, I took a Literature and Film class, where we read about a dozen books and watched the movie adaptations of them. Included in this lineup were the novel of War of the Worlds, with us watching the Spielberg movie, as well as clips from the first movie and Independence Day for comparison. The day we watched the Spielberg movie in class, we got up to about five minutes or so from the ending, and I hadn't seen the remake (though I'd read the book and knew the ending already). I was telling a couple of friends in my other class that day what we were watching.

Friends: Oh, I hated the ending of that movie! It was so stupid!
Me: ::confused look:: Um, why? Does it end differently from the book? (I thought the book's ending was fine.)
Friends: Dunno, how's the book end?
Me: ::tells the end of the book::
Friends: Yeah, it ends like that.

And you didn't know that's how Wells wrote it? Oi. The ending's fine, people.

[JustADude]

SC: Do you have Monster?

My first thought was of the movie with Christina Ricci, about the female serial killer. It was based off live interviews, not a book, though.