"I'm a server and understand but you get a buck tip"

[slick]

Maybe we can have a thread started on when we should tip. What I mean is, I know I should tip a waiter/waitress at a restaurant, but where else?
Sometimes I like to take my car to this car wash, they run it through the car wash, and when it comes out, a guy will hand dry it. He will also apply tire shine to the tires, clean the windows from the INSIDE, dry and clean the door jam areas, etc. When he is done and calls me over, I hand him $5 for the trouble. I have never seen anyone else tip, so I don't know if its necessary or not, but I still do it.
Also, I notice that my housekeepers never get tips. I always tip housekeeping when I stay at hotels. I don't feel that everyone should tip, most shouldn't. But there are those people that leave the room in a mess, I feel they should acknowledge this by leaving a few bucks and note. Its just a nice gesture, letting the housekeeper know "I made a mess, I am sorry, please don't let this discourage you". Rooms get dirty, but our housekeepers shouldn't have to move furniture because you re-arranged it. And they should have to clean crap off of the walls. Things like this bother me a little.
And this is why I would like to start a list or something, so I know when I should tip (or when its really appreciated, I don't know how much people make at there jobs).

[theredbaron47]

I disagree. I think tips should be given for service that meets or exceeds expectations. If you get bad service? Don't tip. I agree. But if you get good, adquate service, and don't tip? That just ain't right.

(This is all from the viewpoint of a customer.)

If I go to a restaurant, I expect service. Hell, if I had the option, I'd wait on myself; I'd have absolutely no problem with that (i.e. I wouldn't require a waiter or server), but this is not possible, so I expect (require) service. If I go to a store, I expect service there; I expect to be waited on, in the form of clerks helping me find what I need, cashiers ringing me up for my purchase(s) and taking my payment for it(them), and if necessary, someone helping me load it all into my truck. Nobody ever tipped me when I was a cashier for delivering service that met expectations (and usually exceeded them, as I was a good cashier). The stock people very rarely received tips, and were elated when they did, even if just a dollar. My point behind this rambling is that if I go somewhere and expect to receive service, and receive the service I expect, I don't think I should pay you extra for that.

Society has engraved in our minds that certain places and establishments "require" tips, while others do not. Waitstaff are tipped, while cashiers are not. Society has also decided that waitstaff are paid below minimum wage, for whatever unGodly reason. I've been told before that this is because they will "make up for it in tips", meaning that it has been established that tips are the norm. WHY? If I'm paying money for a meal at a restaurant, why is adequate service from the waitstaff worth more money on top of my bill than adequate service from the cashier at Wal-Mart? Prices at Wal-Mart are marked accordingly to account for services received from the staff there; why is this not the case with restaurants?

I'm fairly certain I've put my foot in my mouth by this point to several people out there, but I hope you see where I'm coming from. I stand by my opinions (even though I do tip as is the norm). Thank you for reading!

[wagegoth]

Being waited on at a restaurant is one of the reasons for going. If you don't want it, get fast food or cook for yourself. A good waiter makes for a much better meal. They'll let you know what's good, help you pick a wine, and make sure you get to enjoy the evening with good food, good drinks, and not a worry beyond paying the bill.

Starting back in the 19th century, waitstaff often was not paid, and depended entirely on tips for income. Much of our outmoded law is based on these relics of history. If you go to a store where you sit, requested items are selected for you, then brought to you for approval, packaged, wrapped and/or shipped for you, you are usually paying these salespeople commission, which they earn by giving you extra service. Personal shoppers are often properly treated to gifts by regular, happy customers.

Someone directing you to an aisle to find something, or even walking you there, is not providing the same level of service. Cashiers don't do your shopping for you, they are there to collect the money owed for the goods you wish to purchase, and bagging the items so you can take them home easily (some stores are bag yourself). You've probably noticed that many stores are using self-checks, so there's even less service being provided.

There seems to be some confusion between goods and services. You purchase goods at a store; a restaurant is a combination of goods and services, especially services.

[RecoveringKinkoid]

Anyway, I hope telling her to be more considerate and at least respect that I want to tip the girl will get through. Any tips on how best to tell off friends who don't tip? [sorry for off-topicness of question]

Well, do what I have done with my more tip-clueless friends: simply eductate them on what it's like to wait tables, how they depend on tips, what they make per hour, and how they are taxed. If your friend is truly a nice, generous person, she would be mortified to learn that she's been not tipping someone making two bucks and hour and paying taxes out of pocket on food sold, not tips earned.

If she's a jerk, she won't care. Nice people care about contributing to the unfair treatment of others.

Now, in your case, she's also stealing tips. This sort of puts you on a weak stance to argue for her virtue. I wouldn't dine with such a person. Hell, I wouldn't have such a person in my home. She's a thief. But if you feel she's redeemable, maybe let her see you quietly replace the tip with an embarassed look on your face. Then, if the bill's not already paid, insist on paying her part of it. Then, in order to really rub it in, press cash on her in the parking lot in a quiet, secretive way, whispering, "No, really, you can pay me back when you get a little more on your feet, okay?"

I think she'll get the message. Or at least be embarassed enough to make sure next time she's out with you, she behaves with a little more class.

[theredbaron47]

**Ends opinions here to prevent future arguments**

[Boozy]

Then, in order to really rub it in, press cash on her in the parking lot in a quiet, secretive way, whispering, "No, really, you can pay me back when you get a little more on your feet, okay?"

Burn! This is why I think you're so awesome, RK. You always come up with the best ways of calling people out on their inappropriate behaviour without being rude or escalating the situation.

This approach won't lead to a nasty confrontation. Its classier to imply that someone is poor than to flat out call someone a thief. But you get your point across all the same. Clever idea.

[RecoveringKinkoid]

Thank you.

See, if you call them a thief, they just get defensive. Argument ensues. Nothing accomplished.

If you suggest that you believe they are desperate and in need of coddling, and then go to try and help them, then I would HOPE they'd be embarassed enough to knock it off.

[Jester]

I was on vacation when I first read this, and meant to reply, but just didn't have the time. So, here goes....

I'll either make it up next time

Number of people who have not tipped me: countless.
Number of people who have not tipped me, but promised to "make it up next time": a large fraction of the above countless nontippers.
Number of people who have not tipped me, promised to "make it up next time" and actually DID make it up next time: Precisely ZERO.

Which is why I and my service brethren tend to not take this phrase at all seriously.

Now, if you DO go back and make it up next time, more power to you, you are without question a better person than the rest of the people who use this line. But do not be surprised by the look of utter shock and bewilderment in your server's eyes. They are not used to such things, after all.

I hate tipping a lot though when basically the waiter/waitress just came by, took my order, disappeared, someone else brought the food out, and they only later reappear briefly to ask if everything is okay and disappear again until I'm flagging down another waiter/waitress to get them so I can pay my bill.

If that is all they did, that is not high quality service, and when you tip, you should do so with that in mind.

then it makes those people who don't do it complete f***trumpets. (I love that phrase!)

. So, if you don't like tipping, don't eat at restaurants.

I too love the phrase, and agree wholeheartedly with the philosophy of "if you don't like tipping, don't eat at restaurants." Or at the very least, not at MY restaurant!

Now one time, while vacationing, I had horrible service. The food was good but the waitress was very rude, slammed my food down when serving it. I tried to be very polite to no aval. She was just a nasty person. My grandma said when you get service like that leave a penny, I didn't have it in me, so I gave 10% and she chased me out of the restaurant and threw the tip at me she yelled"keep your f***ing money!" I went in and complained to the manager and got my money back. Since then I have been really afraid of tipping bad let me tell you. I also swear to you I was not a dreaded SC to her!

He followed us outside and down several streets screaming and demanding to know what the deal was. He left right before I gave up and gave him the fight he was clearly looking for. My friend called the restaurant immediately and got an apology and an offer for a free meal...not that we'll ever go back!

Horrible service should be tipped horribly. The above are both examples of horrible service. Servers who chase their customers out of the establishment bitching about the tip should be fired. Period. (Yes, a server just said this!) A table just the other day gave me 53 cents on a $24.12 tab. It sucked, but I did not chase them down. I thought many evil thoughts about them, mentally cursed them and their progeny for ten generations, and went about doing my job of providing the rest of the non-fucktrumpets with exemplary service. And made my money DESPITE those cheap bastards.

The above story reminds me of my uncle and a situation like it that I have told before. Uncle Harry was a great tough old guy, one of those old men that will go out in the winter when it just snowed wearing only an undershirt and pants. Uncle Harry tipped 10% or 20%--there was no 15% for him. (Or less....for crappy service, he would appropriately stiff the server.) You gave him good service, you got a good tip. You didn't, you didn't. Very simple. Well, one day, after he had gotten what he considered less than adequate service, he left a 10% tip and left the restaurant. The server came running out, clutching the tip in his hand, waving it in Uncle Harry's face. "THIS is all you left me?" he shouted in Uncle Harry's face. Nonplussed, Uncle Harry took the tip from the server's hand, examined it thoughtfully, and calmly asked, "You don't think this is a good tip for the service you provided?" "No! I do NOT!" the server screamed at him. Uncle Harry looked him dead in the eye, and calmly said, "Then you get nothing," put the tip in his pocket, and strolled away.

Needless to say, I think Uncle Harry ROCKED! And he is an example I think more people should follow if/when confronted with such unprofessional behavior. Again, folks, this is a SERVER saying this.

[icmedia]

However, as a waitress, I only claimed the tips that I got. That always added up to less than the figure that the CCRA would have used. Both I and your daughter are lucky to have never been audited. It was a safe bet though...the government isn't going to audit someone making what I made.

Around here (Ohio, USA), the IRS has taken to auditing the restaurant as a whole if they feel not enough tips are being claimed. This is legal due to the fact that employers' kick-in taxes, unemployment payments and workman's comp payments are based on a server's total pay-including tips. Thusly, if the server isn't paying enough taxes, neither is the restaurant.

Then they fine any individual servers and collect back taxes as well as getting a bigger chunk of money out of the restaurant.

As a result, restaurants know they are responsible for making their servers claim the proper amount and many have taken to having servers claim all of their tips, not just the 8% of a server's net sales as required by law. Heck-even at restaurants that don't force their waitstaff to claim 100% tips, it's impossible to claim less than your credit card tips, as those are automatically submitted to the IRS by the credit card company. With around 60-70% of a restaurant's daily take coming in on credit/debit/check cards, that same percentage of tips has to be claimed.

As a result, some servers end up owing the restaurant money if they made a lot of tips on just a few shifts. That hourly rate doesn't cover taxes if a server pulls in $500 in tips in a 30 hour week, considering that the average taxes on approx. $600 in Ohio would come out to $125 or so.

Of course, a lot of this has already been said, so I'll stop

[LadyAndreca]

When I was a kid, my parents taught me that 10% was the baseline, more for good service. I was quite embarassed when I came to NJ and found out that 15% was what most people considered absolute minimum and 10% was very rude for good service.

The only time I've ever refused to tip a server, she EARNED it. It was a good sitdown Japanese restaraunt, and I was there with four friends. She didn't give three of us our salads (her comment was "yes, you get salad" when we called her over to ask for them), SPILLED MY SOUP ON ME, and didn't seperate the two sushi orders out when she took the order, so the two guys (who weren't sitting next to each other) had to ask for an extra plate because the kitchen thought it was one order. We were the only table she had, but we had to get up and go talk to her when we needed anything. One of my friends left a normal tip because 'she might just be having a bad day', and my fiance left the lowest tip I've ever seen him leave. I still would have left SOME tip if she hadn't spilled on me...or, if she'd accidentally spilled but was otherwise okay. I was glad to finish and get out of there, and never would have gone back if the food hadn't been excellent.

Uh... <_< Sorry for ranting...

[Jester]

Former server trainer chiming in here....

As a result, restaurants know they are responsible for making their servers claim the proper amount and many have taken to having servers claim all of their tips, not just the 8% of a server's net sales as required by law.

Actually, no. The law states, in virtually every place I've worked, that servers must claim 100% of the tips they earn. And as a trainer, that is what I told all new servers. You MUST by law declare every penny you earn. Period.

Of course, no server I have ever met actually DID that. The FACT is a bit different from the LAW, you see. As long as you claim a certain reasonable amount, there really is no way that anyone can prove you are full of it. The smart servers know what to claim without getting a guy with a clipboard and a calculator knocking on his door.

Not, mind you, that *I* ever claimed less than 100% of the tips that I earned....

As a result, some servers end up owing the restaurant money if they made a lot of tips on just a few shifts. That hourly rate doesn't cover taxes if a server pulls in $500 in tips in a 30 hour week, considering that the average taxes on approx. $600 in Ohio would come out to $125 or so.

I have never had to pay a restaurant back, or owed them money. I know of many times for myself and everyone else where the math ended up being against the server, yes, but in that case the server merely received a paycheck for $0.00, or a void check.

The only exception I have seen to the above is when the server had benefits through the employer, and the amount of the paycheck after everything was figured out was less than enough to make the benefits payment. In that case, yes, the server had to pay, but it was to the benefits company usually, not the establishment itself.

/server trainer mode...

[Boozy]

Actually, no. The law states, in virtually every place I've worked, that servers must claim 100% of the tips they earn. And as a trainer, that is what I told all new servers. You MUST by law declare every penny you earn. Period.

Jester, icmedia didn't say 8% of tips. They said:

...not just the 8% of a server's net sales as required by law

[Jester]

Boozy, I know what icmedia said. And I reiterate that the law does not state that you have to declare a certain percentage of your sales, but that you have to declare 100% of the tips you earn. At least, it has every place I have worked. Individual results may vary, as I am not a lawyer and have not worked in every state. (Just 34 of them.)

But again, I have yet to meet a server who actually DOES that.

[reformedwaitress]

From working in restaurants and law firms let me try to clarify the "reporting tips" thing real quick.

Servers are required to report all of their tips. Period. What I was saying about the being taxed is that servers are taxed on what they claim or 8 to 10% of their sales (depending on the state), whichever is higher. So if you only make 5% of your sales in tips and you report all of it, you'll still be required to pay tax on a higher percentage

[icmedia]

I do want to reiterate that the "8%" figure represents the minimum amount a server is allowed to claim, regardless of whether they actually made that much (in Ohio, at least). It is the amount that a restaurant will base your taxes on if you claim less than that, and I was speaking from the restaurant's standpoint. Yes, the law states you must claim 100% of your tips; however, since the NSA's restaurant-table hidden cameras have not yet been installed in every single American restaurant as of yet, the government has given employers the handy 8% figure to go by. It apparently works out better than trusting employees to be honest...while many are, there are plenty who would claim that every table stiffed them that night if they thought they could get away with it.

Additionally, I pointed out that credit/debit card tips are automatically tracked, so claiming less than those (if your restaurant's system even allows it) raises red flags to the IRS immediately.

As far as the "paying back" thing, it's not required that you pay the restaurant anything past what taxes take out of your check. So, if your check comes out to $100 before taxes and your taxes are $110, most restaurants won't require their servers to pay the $10. I have only worked at one that required it, but as a manager I have always given servers the option of making that payment. Most didn't, but then their required tax was not fully paid.

While that may seem like no big deal to some people, those not paying the proper taxes likely didn't get the full refund they were entitled to at tax time or the maximum Earned Income Credit amount they could have received. Speaking from experience, the EIC amount can drop significantly (by $100 or more) just because you paid a few dollars less tax during the prior year (plus, claiming more in tip income alone will increase your EIC- with EIC, the more you make the more you take).

I don't know about you, but come tax time, I'm trying to squeeze every penny I can out of Uncle Sam and $100 makes a big difference.