A Mother's Milk

[Broomjockey]

I just remembered, when I was at West Edmonton Mall on Saturday, I guess they were doing some kind of protest involving breastfeeding because of the lady's facebook stuff being removed, and my dad even got interviewed while I was in the pet store.

[Becks]

Both, ish.

Sorry to take it , but... ish-ish?

[Rapscallion]

Gesundheit.

Rapscallion

[Cia]

I did both, I breastfed and bottle fed my daughter. When we were home she got popped on and was decently covered. While at work I pumped so she would have mommy milk at daycare.

My SIL tried to breastfeed but she was so big, somewhere between FF - II, that it hurt to much. Bra size people, she was voluptuous to begin with but she could put your eye out when she had milk in her.

As far as breastfeeding in public, I was discrete. It's the women who aren't discrete that get me ticked off. I know my discrete doesn't equal their discrete but come one ladies, if you weren't breastfeeding you would be arrested for indecent exposure. Cover up, I don't want to see your bits hanging out unless a baby's head is in the way.

[Seshat]

So, if I walk up to someone, pull out a boob, point at it and matter-of-factly say, "This is my boob." It'd be okay...?

.... in an appropriate setting, I guess.

I just can't think what an appropriate setting would be!

And now I need to go to bed, because I'm mentally envisaging one of those 'parts of the body' songs from children's TV.

"You put your right boob in,
you put your right boob out.
you put your right boob in
and you shake it all about...."

[NotSoInnocent]

"You put your right boob in,
you put your right boob out.
you put your right boob in
and you shake it all about...."

And now I know that I'm tired...

My very first thought was "MILKSHAKE!"

[iradney]

And now I know that I'm tired...

My very first thought was "MILKSHAKE!"

My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard...

*ducks rotten tomatoes*

[Victoria J]

Personally I have no problem with women breast feeding in public unless they seem to have a problem with it. (For example the women I saw breast feeding in a furniture store room of a large store which did have both a cafe and a mother and baby room - who seemed upset that I was looking at furniture near her).

But I do have a problem with women breast feeding - while eating soup. I saw this once and it was sort of hypnotic, the woman had a baby clamped, perfectly decently, to one breast and was taking spoonfuls of hot soup from a bowl right over the baby's head. I sometimes worry anyway that I might be staring at breast feeding women* but this had a kind of gruesome fascination. She didn't end up burning the baby, but that seemed more luck than judgement.

*I am fascinated, nothing sexual but when I was 3 and I saw a friend's mother breast feeding her little sister I thought it was the most amazing thing in the world. I spent the next year or so breast feeding all my toys. (Reason why even feminists should give their girls dolls - the sight of a small child with a plastic dinosaur held to one nipple seems to surprise people). I still think it's amazing, but these days seeing breastfeeding women just makes me broody.

Victoria J

[Becks]

Gesundheit.

You really ARE too kind.

[Seshat]

*I am fascinated, nothing sexual but when I was 3 and I saw a friend's mother breast feeding her little sister I thought it was the most amazing thing in the world. I spent the next year or so breast feeding all my toys. (Reason why even feminists should give their girls dolls - the sight of a small child with a plastic dinosaur held to one nipple seems to surprise people). I still think it's amazing, but these days seeing breastfeeding women just makes me broody.

One of those 'when you were a child' stories mothers love telling:

I was two and a half when my little brother was born. One of my aunts gave me a baby doll - one of those 'life sized' dolls.

I followed my mother around. What she did to Brother, I did to Doll Brother. Doll Brother got bathed, nappy changed, lullabied to, and 'breastfed'. Apparently Doll Brother got every feeding Brother did, save for the middle of the night ones.

Apparently I mimicked my mother very precisely with the breastfeeding!

[Victoria J]

I followed my mother around. What she did to Brother, I did to Doll Brother. Doll Brother got bathed, nappy changed, lullabied to, and 'breastfed'. Apparently Doll Brother got every feeding Brother did, save for the middle of the night ones.

Apparently I mimicked my mother very precisely with the breastfeeding!

I do think that's sweet - and that anyone with a baby brother or sister benefits from a baby doll.

I however not only had only one toy with an open mouth - a scary plastic dinosaur - but no patience. I became worried that it wasn't actually getting any milk and "fed" it a piece of bread soaked in real milk. I don't think my mother ever figured out why that toy started to smell funny...

Apologies for getting off topic. Though it does show breast feeding mothers can be a bad influence on small children. Sort of.

Victoria J

[Seshat]

I do think that's sweet - and that anyone with a baby brother or sister benefits from a baby doll.

I have the mental image of the breastfed dinosaur - and that's sweet and cute too.

[Jpurple]

The breast-fed toy dinosaur story is priceless! My daughter also breast-fed her favorite stuffed sheep for a while, even though it doesn't really have a mouth to speak of. She was really fascinated by the whole 'baby animals that drink milk from their mommies' concept for a while, but I'm not having any more kids so we just read a few books about baby humans.

As for the boobs issue- mine are in better shape now than they were before I breast-fed my daughter- of course, that is almost 6 years ago now and involves some wieght fluctation, but aside from stretch marks, my breasts are just as perky and slightly larger than they used to be. (yeah, I know...TMI)

[Brightglaive]

If you want my opinion about the entire question, though, I'm more in favor of breastfeeding, primarily for commercial reasons. It's less expensive, and the packaging is much more attractive.

And after time in South America, public breastfeeding doesn't faze me, whether it's done discretely or not.

ROFLMAO

I'd have to say I agree. The packaging IS more attractive. I spent some time in the rural Philippines and mothers breastfeeding in front of me doesn't phase me anymore. So I know what you mean Gurndigarn.

I've only ever had one woman in my store start breastfeeding randomly in the store... didn't really offend me (apart from the rudeness... I was serving her at the time... could the baby not wait the thirty seconds the transaction would have taken?) but other than the "focusontheeyesfocusontheeyesFOCUSONTHEEYES!" aspect it was ok... my collegues all found it hilarious though...

When I'd have a mother in the Philippines just "whip it out" I had to do the same thing. "Focusontheeyes, FOCUSontheeyes, FocusontheEYES!!!!"

http://www.kevinandkell.com/2006/kk1204.html

That's what I do, heh heh.

I hate to say it but the "look everywhere but at the nursing mother" look is usually what I do.

I'll say it. I'll say what a lot of men think. I love looking at breasts. Big or small. I won't deny it. It's part of men's psyche. Call it evolutionary instinct or antisocietal influence. Whatever. Breasts are something I (and a LOT of men) notice, covered or uncovered.

Having said that I try to look away when a mother is breastfeeding because honestly, I'm mostly worried that the mother will think I'm a perv. (No, I do not mentally undress women in my mind. That IS being a perv IMNSHO)


Whether covered up or not, breastfeeding is a natural thing. Is it appropriate in western society? I couldn't give a rat's a$$. That's where the controversy comes in. Controversy is created by the uncomfortable feeling that other people get when your beliefs don't mirror their own and the fear that you are imposing your beliefs on them or society as a whole.

Now having said that, I'll end my post with this quote from a forgettable movie and one final declaration.

Troy: You know, I asked him about that. He said, good manners are just a way of showing other people we have respect for them. See, I didn't know that, I thought it was just a way of acting all superior. Oh and you know what else he told me?
Eve: What?
Troy: He thinks I'm a gentleman and you're a lady.
Eve: [disgusted] Well, consider the source! I don't even know what a lady is.
Troy: I know, I mean I thought a "gentleman" was somebody that owned horses. But it turns out, his short and simple definition of a lady or a gentleman is, someone who always tries to make sure the people around him or her are as comfortable as possible.
Eve: Where do you think he got all that information?
Troy: From the oddest place - his parents. I mean, I don't think I got that memo from mine.

I am first and foremost a Gentleman, and I make sure to use my good manners as much as possible. If people make me uncomfortable I try to remove myself from the situation or use good manners if that is not possible. If people would focus more on being gentlemen and gentlewomen then it wouldn't matter if the woman was parading around topless. Controversy solved.

'Nuff said.

On a side note.....speaking personally, my SO breastfed our children in an over the shoulder sling that covered her and the babies and held the babies in a position so that they could breastfeed. It also left her hands free to do whatever she needed to do

[tollbaby]

I can't believe that people still have a hang-up about women breast-feeding in public. When my son was born, I once had to breastfeed him at the mall (we were too far from home for him to wait until we got back). I sat down on a bench, covered myself with a towel, and started feeding him. Mall security came over and asked me to leave. I asked why, since I wasn't exposing anything. They literally said, "Listen lady, put your tits back where they belong and get out, or we'll call the cops." I asked them to put it in writing, and they did.

So I went home, phoned the local papers and a few tv and radio stations. That mall now has a lovely breastfeeding area, PROMINENTLY available, not tucked away in some back corner somewhere, with comfortable chairs, two changing tables, and even disposable cover sheets for those who came unprepared.

Breastfeeding is a perfectly natural process. People need to get over this hangup about seeing a woman's boobs. I sincerely feel sorry for those who can't see a woman feeding her baby as something perfectly normal and ordinary. It was the best part of being a new parent for me, it's a special bond between mother and child, and it shouldn't be shunted into back rooms or bathrooms (good god, would YOU want to eat your dinner in a public washroom?).

Now, I'll grant certain points that have been raised in this thread. It's preferable for the mother to cover up, as much to avoid distractions for the baby as to hide herself, and yes, discretion is the better part of valor My father in law was uncomfortable with SEEING breastfeeding, as was my father, so when I was over at their houses, I fed my son in a spare bedroom. Made it easier to feed him anyway, since there were no kids running around and noise to distract him.

Why is it A-OK for men to go around without a shirt, even if their man boobs hang down to their waist, but the minute some woman is seen breastfeeding, it's a huge deal?

Exactly. Thank you!

Back in 1998, just before I got pregnant, it became legal for women to go topless in Ontario. I've only ever seen women do it at the rally that very summer, and I've only done it once, but at least we're "permitted" to do it now. (personally, my boobs are ... er... huge, and they get really sweaty underneath if I go around topless, so I'd rather be clothed, but if I was smaller, I'd be thrilled to be able to go around shirtless in summer).

2) My bf's mother is a nurse. We were watching a commercial about baby formula and on the bottom of the screen it says "Breastmilk is best. Ask your doctor." and my bf said that his mother had told him that babies that were not breast fed don't end up as smart as breast fed babies. Is that true? I wasn't breastfed....that could explain a lot.....

Entirely untrue. Breastfed babies may be a bit more resistant to childhood diseases, and may develop mental faculties at a SLIGHTLY faster rate, but they're no smarter, better, or more special than non-breastfed babies. It provides an advantage with antibodies, etc. That's all.