that's not what I asked you!

[LizaMarie]

This call was a bit like pulling teeth. Maybe there was a bad connection. Perhaps the customer was deaf. Regardless of the reason, the result was bewildering for me.

*ringring!*
Me: Opening phone speech, how can I help you?
SC: Can I order some coffee?
Me: Sure thing, and do you know what your customer id is by any chance? (note: customer ids help us look up their info quickly. customers generally know their ids, but if they dont it's no big deal, just a little annoying)
SC: Yes.
Me: .......
SC:.......
Me: And what's that ID?
SC: We're from 02895.
Me: (in my head: hokay. zip code. not what I asked, but we can work with this) And what's your church's name?
SC: First Prebyterian
Me: (Eureka!) Ok, so that's such and such address?
SC: Yes.

*proceeds to place order*

Me: Ok great, and would you like us to send you the invoice with your order?
SC: My name is Sam.
Me: Oookay. Is it ok if we put your invoice in the box?
SC: Ye-es, our treasurer will get it and we'll send you the check after the 14 days like the agreement said, and did I order the green tea?
Me: Yep, you did!
SC: Maybe I should get the green magic tea...what's the difference?
Me: (I honestly don't know the difference. I make up a different answer everytime- this time, some bs about one being a traditional style green tea, the other is Sri Lankan, etc)
SC: Oooooooohhhhh.......
Me:...
SC:....
Me:...so would you rather get the green tea or green magic tea?
SC: They're used to the green, we'll stick with that.
Me: Ok great, well you're all set then, thanks for your call *click*

this person needed to cut back on her daily intake of stupid if you ask me.

[AnaKhouri]

I hate those people.

Me: Is someone helping you already?
Customer: Yes! I'm looking for this title.

>sigh<

Me: Would you like these in a separate bag?
Customer: Credit card.

I don't see why I should try to help them when they're obviously too self-absorbed to listen to anything I say.

[KellyHabersham]

I'm sure I've done that to people in stores before, but not on purpose - I do have a mild hearing loss, and every so often I misunderstand what someone is saying. But, that's just me.

[Ljt09863]

recently, my store manager has told us we shouldn't say,"can i help you?' but to say "how can i help you?" they feel that the first is a yes or no answer, making the customer walk away quickly, versuses the second question, they have to give more of a response(you would think so, at least). this is how a typical interaction using this method, goes with a customer.

me-"hi! how can i help you?"
Customer-"good and you?"
Me-'......fine.....can i help you?"
customer-"nope!" and walks away......

[theredbaron47]

I've done that on occasion, where I'll be thinking about something and not really paying attention to what's going on around me (I've actually walked into a wall once, really embarrassing )... I don't think it's sucky behavior, but if the entire conversation continues like that, then we have a problem.

I got that all the time at the hardware store, where the majority of the clientele was much too high above me to pay attention to me as I was ringing them out. Typically:

Me: "Hi, how are you?"
Them: "Paper in plastic, please."
Me: "Can do. How are you today?"
Them: "That will be American Express."
Me: <having processed their sale> "Alright, I'll need you to sign--"
Them: "Oh, I have a coupon! You better still be able to take it!"
Me: >_<

But once or so isn't that bad to me. They usually are wrapped up in thought, in my experience that wasn't taken from the hardware store.

[dizzy_starshine]

My favourite will always be

THEM: Hello can I collect my prescription?
ME: Sure what's your name?
THEM: 100 high street
ME: ok and what's you're name?
THEM: I don't pay I have a medical exemption
ME: That's fine, can I have your name please?

It takes at least 3 goes to get their name and even then they think I can find their script out of 200 without knowing their name >_<

[myswtghst]

This happens all the time in my call center. Sometimes it's because the techs are driving or somewhere noisy, but usually because they're too wrapped up in their own thoughts to pay attention to what I'm asking. Whether or not I ask questions like "how are you?" and "what can I do for you?" depends on whether or not the tech immediately starts talking over me.

The most common one I get is the tech who, when asked how they are, responds with either a site name, an issue, or a case number.

[Imogene]

SC: Maybe I should get the green magic tea...what's the difference?

One's magic...

At Chesterfield, seriously, almost every single customer who walked in the door, my usual greeting was, "How are you today?"
More often than not? They were doing, "Just looking," that day.

[Zinjadu]

Yep.

When I say the S_____ greeting, "Hi, how are you today?" I definitely get responses that have absolutely nothing to do with what I just asked...

xxx-xxxx (phone # for club card)

do you know where_____ is?

can I pay by VISA/Mastercard/AmEx/whatever?

I need ______.

is this lane "cash only"?

double bags. (OMG, on this one I can barely restrain the smart-ass reply...)

I want carry-ouy/parcel pickup.


I'm sure there's more, but I just can't think of them right now.


Sometimes, if it's a total SC and they're deliberately ignoring my greeting and not responding at all, I'll repeat the greeting over and over until I do get a response. Some people just need to be taught not to treat retail people like crap. None of them complained to management that I know of... What would they say? "She kept saying hi until I answered her"?

[Daskinor]

SC: Maybe I should get the green magic tea...what's the difference?
Me: (I honestly don't know the difference. I make up a different answer everytime- this time, some bs about one being a traditional style green tea, the other is Sri Lankan, etc)
.

That's actually the correct answer. Its a fair trade green tea from Sri Lanka

[MrDelirious]

Back when all the students could charge to Account Receivable, a typical conversation would go thusly:

Me: Hi, how will you be paying for this today?
Them: Good, you?
Me: Doing well, and how will you be paying for this?
Them: Oh, sorry. Cash.

I understand. I'm guilty of the same thing at the movies.

Me: Here's the tickets.
Ticket taker dude: Okay, theater seven is down the hall on your left. Enjoy the Show!
Me: You too
Mental Me: %^&*! They won't be enjoying this show! They're tearing tickets! They can't see this movie! Gah!

[Broomjockey]

Me: Here's the tickets.
Ticket taker dude: Okay, theater seven is down the hall on your left. Enjoy the Show!
Me: You too
Mental Me: %^&*! They won't be enjoying this show! They're tearing tickets! They can't see this movie! Gah!

Heeheehee As a nearly four year theatre veteran, lemme tell you, I always got a snicker out of those people. Even more so the ones that realized it. Better than any of that though were the co-workers who would sell me my hot dog for my supper break, and ritualistically close the transaction "Enjoy your show!" Depending on who it was changed my reply. People I didn't like? "Break. Not show." People I liked? "I would, but management frowns on my ducking in the movies on my breaks. Keeping an eye out is such a pain."

The customers I didn't like were the ones that went like this:
Me: Hi, you're in theatre seven on your left, enjoy your show!
SC: Hey, where's the washrooms?
Me: Halfway down either end.
SC: K. Which theatre am I in?
Me: Seven.
SC: Which way is it?
Me: On your left.

Heck, sometimes they'd interrupt me saying the "seven on your left" part to ask which theatre they were in!

[edible_hat]

Me: Here's the tickets.
Ticket taker dude: Okay, theater seven is down the hall on your left. Enjoy the Show!
Me: You too
Mental Me: %^&*! They won't be enjoying this show! They're tearing tickets! They can't see this movie! Gah!

Our public transport system has a box that you put your ticket in, it validates the ticket and gives it back. Or a red light comes on and it beeps at you if there's a problem. Occasionally I've witnessed passengers thanking the machine for giving the ticket back.

[LizaMarie]

Me: Here's the tickets.
Ticket taker dude: Okay, theater seven is down the hall on your left. Enjoy the Show!
Me: You too
Mental Me: %^&*! They won't be enjoying this show! They're tearing tickets! They can't see this movie! Gah!

I do that at restaurants. The server will say "Enjoy your meal!" and I'll respond with a "Thanks, you too!"

And Daskinor, how did you know?

[Geek King]

Our public transport system has a box that you put your ticket in, it validates the ticket and gives it back. Or a red light comes on and it beeps at you if there's a problem. Occasionally I've witnessed passengers thanking the machine for giving the ticket back.

Always thank the machines. They can make your life miserable. If threatening them seems to work, being nice to a working one couldn't hurt.

Geek King, the RAM whisperer