Attention Ladies: It's Not an Insult.

[blas]

I prefer Miss as well, but any respect is better than none at all.

Two of the male room runners I work with hate being called sir. One took me aside and said "Blas, I am not a CEO, I am not a slave driver, and I am not a sergeant in the Army...."

I cut him off and said "Wow, you're in denial SIR!" and walked away. I always call both of them sir. That's how they act, so I will treat them that way.

[Bloodsoul]

Hmm, I've thought about using, "M'lady".. would that sound too RenFair?

[Imogene]

Okay, I read most of the first page...
Anybody: "Excuse me, Ma'am?"
RJ: *blink, stop, look around* "Are you speaking to me?"
Anybody: "...Yes...?"
RJ: "See, now, I woke up feeling particularly masculine today, and I don't think I've been clocked at all today, however, now it's all ruined. Thanks a TON..."

[blas]

I think I make it difficult on people because sometimes I use "sir" in a condenscending tone, as a sign of disrespect and disapproval. Other times, I use it in a tone of respect and admiration.

I use "Sir" in a respectful tone with my supervisor at work and with male employees at stores.

I use "Sir" in a disrespectful tone when speaking with fellow employees who disrespect me and treat me like crap. Sometimes I refer to the women as "sir" just to be a little smartass. They call me "little lady" like I'm some dumb little girl, so you gotta fight back somehow, right?

Edit: I wonder what would happen if one random night I just threw my arm up and screamed "SEIG HEIL!"

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Hypothetical Me (WARNING: Hypothetical Me is a total jackass) : Hey, b****, you forgot your receipt!

How about..."Hey bitch! Here's your receipt, you dumb cow!" Maybe she'll like that better?...lol.

I like how you both think! Here's my hypothetical (or maybe not ) response:

Me: Ma'am, you forgot your receipt!
Her: Don't call me ma'am, I'm not old!
Me: I-er-I was just trying to be nice. Here's your receipt.
Her: I'm not old enough to be a ma'am.
Me: Okay! Terribly sorry to have offended you. Let's try this again! Here's your receipt, bitch! That better?

[MrDelirious]

I suspect Mr. Delirious may be from in the Southern U.S.

Technically, you're right, but move over to the west significantly. Cross the Mississippi River and keep going until you hit the next A. Also, I lived in (well, near) Cleveland until I was 13. So no "ya'll" from me, unless I'm being silly. Although, my grandmother (southern Ohio) did occasionally remind me that I had to "Wersh my hands before yuns go to the boo-fay."

I was just raised with, well, chivalry. I hold doors, I ask if people need help, etc. It's always disappointing when I get glares for being nice. I open a door, lady walks a-r-o-u-n-d me and opens the other door. WTF?

[gunsage]

Cross the Mississippi River and keep going until you hit the next A.

...

Alaska? Sorry, you'll have to forgive me; I'm not so good with geometry. Ahaha...ow...that even hurt MY head.

[kibbles]

I was just raised with, well, chivalry. I hold doors, I ask if people need help, etc. It's always disappointing when I get glares for being nice. I open a door, lady walks a-r-o-u-n-d me and opens the other door. WTF?

That's just an action by a bitter, frigid "lady" who has to make every action a gender issue.

[Reyneth]

After one or two complaints about "Ma'am" making women feel old (some said in good nature, some not), I just started referring to every woman as "Miss." Up to little old ladies.

No one has complained so far.

So the ones that think it is demeaning - IE, I think they were "beneath" me (younger, therefore inferior line of thought) must not be in your area. *sigh*

I've called a few guys "ma'am" on the phone. I catch myself, we have a good laugh, I blame it on being a Monday, or a Friday, or whatever, and it's all good.

Usually.

[MadMike]

I guess that's one of those situations where you're damned if you do, damned if you don't.

[Shengirl]

I'm 21, and I frankly look a few years younger, but customers still call me ma'am from time to time. I also use sir and ma'am with all customers that are around 16 or over, and I've had no problems so far. And Maryland is NOT the South, no matter what certain New Englanders I've met think. :-p I'd probably get tetchy if someone called me "Miss," though. Just miss without a first or last name just sounds condescending for some reason.

Then there's Pat, our elderly bagger. He calls me Miss *name*, Little Hitler, Sarge, and the Major. My workplace can be a silly place.

But, you guys from across the pond, would it be seen as bizarre if I went around London calling people Sir and Ma'am? Because, miracle upon miracles, I'm going there in the spring (I'm hugely excited).

And does anybody else thing British people sound like they're saying "mom" when they say "ma'am?" That was really disorienting when I first watched "Tooth and Claw." "Are they calling Queen Victoria, 'Mom?!' ::listens closer::"

[Rapscallion]

Not sure about anyone else, but I tend to call people, "Hello!" It's far easier, and until people tattoo how they want to be called on their foreheads, far safer.

I suspect it's ma'am and sir in the more upmarket establishments, but with the working class scum like me we don't tend to bother with that.

Rapscallion

[crazylegs]

But, you guys from across the pond, would it be seen as bizarre if I went around London calling people Sir and Ma'am? Because, miracle upon miracles, I'm going there in the spring (I'm hugely excited).

And does anybody else thing British people sound like they're saying "mom" when they say "ma'am?" That was really disorienting when I first watched "Tooth and Claw." "Are they calling Queen Victoria, 'Mom?!' ::listens closer::"

Unless they are your social better (I Know, its archane) It would be rather odd to call anyone Sir or Ma'am, especially a random stranger in the street, that said we are accomodating to other peoples ways and customs. You're not going to offend anyone so feel free to carry on as normal

I think its more a Mam (like ham) and with the accent hence why it can sound like Mum/Mom

Enjoy your stay, when are you coming over?

[Shengirl]

?Enjoy your stay, when are you coming over?

Early June. We're doing one of those "See as much Europe as you can in ten days" tours, but it does include a day and a half in London. I expect my traveling companions to be utter. tourists. However, I've read/seen enough media from over there I'll probably keep from making an arse out of myself. Theoretically. At least, I'll avoid using the word "pants" for any reason whatsoever, just to be safe. :-p Anything in particular I MUST see or eat while I'm there?

[RecoveringKinkoid]

Whether this bugs me or not really depends on who's saying it. When it's little old ladies or little old men, I don't mind. Even if it's other women, but when cocky guys who think they're god's gift to women call me honey and sweetheart, then it bugs me.

Same here. Especially since I'm nearly always older than they are when they are doing it. Very not cool.

But it very much does depend on the person and the situation. A lot of women down here do it, and they very often do it to me, again not realizing I'm probably considerably older than they are. That doesn't bother me.

Really, it's all in the delivery.