Dumbest question you have ever been asked

[unholypet]

SC: What comes on a club hoagie?
Me: Turkey, bacon, and ham.
SC: And what is on the Turkey and cheese?
Me: ...turkey and... and cheese. *snicker
---
SC: *looks at open/close sign, then at me*
Me: Is something wrong? (we were in the middle of ordering)
SC: Well-*looks at sign.. then at clock*
Me: ??? *looks at clock*
SC: Are you.. are you closed?
Me: We close at 8p.m. tonight, sir.
SC: But.. its 12p.m. right now!

[shenzee]

I don't even know where to buy light bulbs?

And yes I consider it a question because I've yet to speak to a sorority girl who can state something without ending the sentence in that strange higher change of voice that makes it sound like a question!

This was said by one of my tenants after being told that changing light bulbs in her apartment was her responsibility. This was preceded by the question of how to change a light bulb.

[JustADude]

SC: Why can't you put a square picture in a round frame without trimming it or shrinking it?

To be fair, you could always try the "fish-eye" effect. Just distort the edges to fit.

[AKATHEPOOF]

i work in a scheduling dept for an eye clinic. my two favorite dumb questions are:

Me: "Thank you for calling blah blah blah eye center, the is AKATHEPOOF, how can i help you?" (i have to say this anytime i answer the phone, even for internal calls)
SC:"Where did i call?" or "is this the eye center?" or "who is this?"


Me:"our next available appointment is on the 35 of Bluevember."
SC: "Do you have anything sooner?"

Do people not know what 'Next Available' means? And usually they ask more then once. They just rephrase it. Sometimes i'll answer back with "if we had something sooner, i would offer it to you." that seems to get the dense ones to understand that next available, means next available.

[Alpha Strike]

Oh, do I feel your pain. I live in NEW Mexico. Some people, including huge corporations and major news organizations, haven't gotten the memo that we became a state in 1912. I just wonder what they think that big hole between Arizona and Texas is?! New Mexico Magazine has a section called, "One of Our Fifty is Missing," and it is just downright scary how they never run out of stories!

I remember reading stories centered around New Mexico and the last time the Olympics were held in the US (the games in Utah?). There were several reports of people from NM calling and trying to buy tickets over the phone; upon relating their addresses to the agents, they were told that customers outside the United States had to purchase tickets a different way...

[PuckishOne]

Aside from this wonderful old chestnut:

Me: Evil Insurance Co, this is Puck.
SC: Is this Evil Insurance Co?

I'd have to say my favorite dumb question on this job is "Where do I find the address to send the disability claim to?" when it is written on every single page of the application, including the cover page (where it is center-aligned and in boldface type).

[edible_hat]

I had another good one yesterday:

SC: (on the phone) "Do you know the phone number for (competing brand convenience store on the other side of town)?"
Me: "No, you might want to try the phone book."
SC: "OK, how about (store I work at and that she'd called)?"

I somehow managed to say "you know that number already, you just called it" in a way that didn't annoy her.

[MrDelirious]

SC: Are you open?
Nah, I'm just standing behind this register, making expectant eye contact with you. I don't even work here.

This one takes the cake, though. It's 7:10. We closed at 7:00. I'm counting out ones. I hear a tap on the window behind me. Behind said window is a girl. Girl mouths "Closed?"

Hey. You're looking THROUGH the store hours. The doors are locked. The lights are low. It's empty. Nah, we're open. You just have to run fast enough.

[Lady Heather]

Every example I came up with has already been posted. Wich means not only are Stupid SC's everywhere, but they're all stupid in the same way.
Somewhere there is a SC site with instructions on how to be a SC, with a Stupid Questions To Annoy Sales People thread.

[CancelMyService]

Me:"our next available appointment is on the 35 of Bluevember."
SC: "Do you have anything sooner?"

Do people not know what 'Next Available' means? And usually they ask more then once. They just rephrase it. Sometimes i'll answer back with "if we had something sooner, i would offer it to you." that seems to get the dense ones to understand that next available, means next available.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAH I get this all the f'ing time.

Me: (on a Friday) the first available time I have to get a tech out will be on Monday from 12-4.
Idiot: So nothing in the morning?
Me:

or

Me: (on a Monday) looks like the first available time we can get someone out is on Wednesday from 2-4.
Idiot: How about on Tuesday?
Me: *brain exploding*...............Wednesday is the first available time I have.
Idiot: Well.........ok............it sure would be nice if you could get out here before that though...........but if that's the best you can dooooooooo...........
me:

[Kat33auS]

One of the shops I work in sells everything for $15. There's signs everywhere in the tiny shop promoting that, and yet I'm still asked how much something is...

I also get asked that about jewellery from the small 'hat stand'-like racks. I usually tell them that the price should be at the top.

One more:
At the end of the day when all of the racks are in the shop and the doors are closed (not locked, as the girls have to leave through them) a customer will occasionally pop in and ask if we're closed or 'closed' closed.

[Hon'ya-chan]

One more:
At the end of the day when all of the racks are in the shop and the doors are closed (not locked, as the girls have to leave through them) a customer will occasionally pop in and ask if we're closed or 'closed' closed.

http://seattlepi.nwsource.com/fun/re...?date=20071106

[Twotall]

A couple...

While working in an amusement park:

"The safety regulations only apply to the kids, right?"

My response: "NO! And get the h*ll off the go-cart track!" (He was actually standing in the track, because it was so important to get a heads-on shot of his kid driving)
What I wanted to say: "Sure, knock yourself out!"

Working at City Hall:

Tax payer: "I'm looking for the Park department"
Me: "Sure, it's straight down this corridor, and through the red door at the end"
TP: "But it's so far... Isn't there an elevator or something I can take to get there?"

No... this is City Hall, not Willy Wonka's factory. Our elevators only go up and down. The worst part is, he was dead serious!

[king4aday]

Lets seeee....my favorite lately has been the women who think they have a smaller/larger bust size than they actually have (underwear store remember)

"yeah...do you 36DD in this for me?" uhm...I would if thats the size you took...I wouldnt put you in anything more than an A


OR

"yeah....do you have this in a 40A?" customer obviously fits in a C.....my response.....Do you get headaches a lot?

[Raieth]

[snip]
"yeah....do you have this in a 40A?" customer obviously fits in a C.....my response.....Do you get headaches a lot?

The sad thing is that most women don't know their bra size. And Have no idea how to size themselves for a bra.