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Having worked on a cruise ship, here are a few fun stories I wanted to share.
First is a story about a co-worker from South Africa dealing with a typical ignorant customer, trying to make small talk with her. As you may know, South Africans have strong accents, this customer was trying to figure out what country she was from, even though it has our nationalities on our name badges (I guess they can't read when they're on vacation). First he guessed Australia, then England (neither of which sound South African) and when she told him South Africa and pointed to her name badge, this guy (without any shame) says out loud "No you're not, only black people are from there!"
I hate using emoticons, but my jaw hit the floor, so this is appropriate
----
I catch two ladies taking a picture of our pictures, despite the big signs throughout saying "pictures are copyright to the cruise line, we appreciate you not copying our photos." I grab the picture and asked "Can I help you ladies with something, photographing copywritten material is illegal."
Them - "oh we just did this because we wanted a smaller size, this is too big to do anything with."
Me - "Well we can print it any size you want, we just display them in large size because people feel they're getting more for their money then."
Them - "How much is this in 5x7 then?"
Me - "You're paying for the work put into the photograph, not the paper, it's the same price."
Them - "Well that's a ripoff! Why is it the same price."
Me - "As I said, the paper is only pennies, if the paper were a concern we should charge you MORE because you are declining this one and want it printed again. What you're paying for is the photographer who worked 11 hours a day, 7 days a week to capture your vacation memories."
Them - "Well, we don't want to pay that much for them, it's not worth that much for a picture! you can keep it!"
So, I put the pictures in the back with all the other rejected photos and within a couple hours the ladies were back they searched all over the displays for their picture again. They eventually came up to the sales desk, but they refused to come to me. They asked one of my co-workers to find that picture and make it 5X7. I guess it was worth that much to them if they couldn't steal it.
----
Another time out on the sea I was patrolling in the gallery because theft happens A LOT on the sea. I saw a man, wearing a white dress shirt stuff some pictures down his shirt. I approached him quickly.
Me- "Sir, I believe you have just slipped some of my pictures down your shirt"
Him - "What the hell are you talking about, would you go so far as to say that I am stealing here!?"
Me - "Actually, if you looked, you can see them through your shirt there."
He looked down and saw his own face through his shirt, he paused for a second and stumbled on his words then...
Him - "I don't have to take these accusations! Do you realize how much I paid to come on this cruise?"
He begins to walk away
Me - "You do know that there are cameras all over the ship sir and if you leave the gallery area, ship's security will be waiting for you at your cabin."
He mumbles hesitates a bit, then pulls the pictures out of his shirt and puts them on the display and leaves.
---
We also sold basic items such as disposable cameras, batteries, film, etc. So a gentleman comes up to me asking for high-8 cassettes.
Me - "Unfortunately sir we no longer carry any those video accessories as there is only so much room on a floating ship."
Him(starting to turn red in the face) - What kinda shop is this!? You don't carry video accessories, that's ridiculous. What DO you carry!?
Me - Well sir, we do have mini-DV cassettes, as well as the dvds for dvd recorders...
Him - "Well that's stupid! What ever happened to serving the customer!? I'm on vacation and you've just ruined it!"
Me - "If I could swim out and find you a high-8 cassette sir, I would."
Him - "Now you're just being an asshole!" and he walked away.
That's right, I ruined his vacation and I'm an asshole because essentially nobody carries High-8 cassettes anymore.
----
Here's a bit more of a general story, would probably happen regularly 2-3 times a week.
Passenger - "Why do you charge so much for pictures. You know if you charged less you'd sell more!"
Over time I created a response, by the end of my career on there I started saying "Technically yes, we would sell more photos, but the company would make less money. For example, a portrait is $22, correct? Compared to Wal Mart, that's a little high, but compared to actual studios with actual photographers, which by the way all of us who work here are, it's is INCREDIBLY inexpensive. Now, if we'd charged $10 each, you MIGHT buy twice as many, we're still losing $2 dollars there, $5 each? you'd buy 3 or 4, even more money going away from the corporation and if we charged less, you wouldn't buy many more!" (Now this is a bit of a vaguery, there are some people I believe would buy more, but as a whole that's how it would go.)
My argument was kind of based on a passenger complaint I read one time, went along the lines of...
"Paying $22 a photograph is rediculous! If you charged $10 each, I'd buy twice as many, $5 each, I'd buy 3 or 4, if you charged $3 each I'd buy at least 5! You do the math!"
Uhhh, they did do the math, we make more money by charging $22.
More stories are hidden in my mind, maybe I'll have more later...
First is a story about a co-worker from South Africa dealing with a typical ignorant customer, trying to make small talk with her. As you may know, South Africans have strong accents, this customer was trying to figure out what country she was from, even though it has our nationalities on our name badges (I guess they can't read when they're on vacation). First he guessed Australia, then England (neither of which sound South African) and when she told him South Africa and pointed to her name badge, this guy (without any shame) says out loud "No you're not, only black people are from there!"
I hate using emoticons, but my jaw hit the floor, so this is appropriate
----
I catch two ladies taking a picture of our pictures, despite the big signs throughout saying "pictures are copyright to the cruise line, we appreciate you not copying our photos." I grab the picture and asked "Can I help you ladies with something, photographing copywritten material is illegal."
Them - "oh we just did this because we wanted a smaller size, this is too big to do anything with."
Me - "Well we can print it any size you want, we just display them in large size because people feel they're getting more for their money then."
Them - "How much is this in 5x7 then?"
Me - "You're paying for the work put into the photograph, not the paper, it's the same price."
Them - "Well that's a ripoff! Why is it the same price."
Me - "As I said, the paper is only pennies, if the paper were a concern we should charge you MORE because you are declining this one and want it printed again. What you're paying for is the photographer who worked 11 hours a day, 7 days a week to capture your vacation memories."
Them - "Well, we don't want to pay that much for them, it's not worth that much for a picture! you can keep it!"
So, I put the pictures in the back with all the other rejected photos and within a couple hours the ladies were back they searched all over the displays for their picture again. They eventually came up to the sales desk, but they refused to come to me. They asked one of my co-workers to find that picture and make it 5X7. I guess it was worth that much to them if they couldn't steal it.
----
Another time out on the sea I was patrolling in the gallery because theft happens A LOT on the sea. I saw a man, wearing a white dress shirt stuff some pictures down his shirt. I approached him quickly.
Me- "Sir, I believe you have just slipped some of my pictures down your shirt"
Him - "What the hell are you talking about, would you go so far as to say that I am stealing here!?"
Me - "Actually, if you looked, you can see them through your shirt there."
He looked down and saw his own face through his shirt, he paused for a second and stumbled on his words then...
Him - "I don't have to take these accusations! Do you realize how much I paid to come on this cruise?"
He begins to walk away
Me - "You do know that there are cameras all over the ship sir and if you leave the gallery area, ship's security will be waiting for you at your cabin."
He mumbles hesitates a bit, then pulls the pictures out of his shirt and puts them on the display and leaves.
---
We also sold basic items such as disposable cameras, batteries, film, etc. So a gentleman comes up to me asking for high-8 cassettes.
Me - "Unfortunately sir we no longer carry any those video accessories as there is only so much room on a floating ship."
Him(starting to turn red in the face) - What kinda shop is this!? You don't carry video accessories, that's ridiculous. What DO you carry!?
Me - Well sir, we do have mini-DV cassettes, as well as the dvds for dvd recorders...
Him - "Well that's stupid! What ever happened to serving the customer!? I'm on vacation and you've just ruined it!"
Me - "If I could swim out and find you a high-8 cassette sir, I would."
Him - "Now you're just being an asshole!" and he walked away.
That's right, I ruined his vacation and I'm an asshole because essentially nobody carries High-8 cassettes anymore.
----
Here's a bit more of a general story, would probably happen regularly 2-3 times a week.
Passenger - "Why do you charge so much for pictures. You know if you charged less you'd sell more!"
Over time I created a response, by the end of my career on there I started saying "Technically yes, we would sell more photos, but the company would make less money. For example, a portrait is $22, correct? Compared to Wal Mart, that's a little high, but compared to actual studios with actual photographers, which by the way all of us who work here are, it's is INCREDIBLY inexpensive. Now, if we'd charged $10 each, you MIGHT buy twice as many, we're still losing $2 dollars there, $5 each? you'd buy 3 or 4, even more money going away from the corporation and if we charged less, you wouldn't buy many more!" (Now this is a bit of a vaguery, there are some people I believe would buy more, but as a whole that's how it would go.)
My argument was kind of based on a passenger complaint I read one time, went along the lines of...
"Paying $22 a photograph is rediculous! If you charged $10 each, I'd buy twice as many, $5 each, I'd buy 3 or 4, if you charged $3 each I'd buy at least 5! You do the math!"
Uhhh, they did do the math, we make more money by charging $22.
More stories are hidden in my mind, maybe I'll have more later...
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