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Christmas Day phone calls at the store...so far...ugh

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  • Christmas Day phone calls at the store...so far...ugh

    I'm working today, and so far I've fielded the following phone calls:

    "Do you have onions?"

    "Do you have a bitcoin machine there? How does it work?"

    "Oh! You're open! Do you have onions?"

    "Can you buy beer today?"

    "I need onions...you have them, right?"

    Sadly, we're only a small convenience store/gas station, so we don't carry any veggies at all. However, if you're looking for bananas that are in the right condition for banana bread, I can help you there. Each person asking about onions has gotten pissy with me...as if it's somehow MY fault that they didn't buy onions prior to today. Not only that, but we've NEVER stocked fresh veggies here and we aren't about to start.

    Yes, we have one of those bitcoin machines. No, I haven't a clue how to use it - it isn't supplied by the company, our staff isn't expected to know how to use it or explain to other people how to use it. The thing instructs you as you go, and, no, I don't know what you need to bring with you in terms of ID or anything else - I'M NOT TRAINED ON HOW TO USE THE DAMN THING NOR DO I HAVE TO KNOW!

    Yes, you can buy beer today. I may end up buying myself a 6pack to take home after...I have a feeling that I'm going to need it, and I haven't even been on shift for two whole hours yet! Who knows, by the end of my shift I may end up taking home a 12 or 24 pack...

  • #2
    Onions, what is so special about onions all of a sudden? Is it something I should know?

    Imagine, there are people who want to invest in Bitcoin, but are not ready to read the instructions themselves. Tells you a lot about too many people trying to get rich without effort.

    Get the 24 pack. Considering the snow storm and how it is affecting deliveries, you may run dry during the week. And if not, next week you will be prepared to invite friends over and have a New Year's party.

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    • #3
      Quoth earl colby pottinger View Post
      Onions, what is so special about onions all of a sudden? Is it something I should know?
      You never heard the story of the Christmas Onion? The baby Jesus was given an onion. He kept peeling off the layers of the onion to get to the gift He thought was inside, which He never found. This is why people wrap gifts inside multiple nested boxes today.

      (That is a true Christmas myth that I just made up.)
      "I don't have to be petty. The Universe does that for me."

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      • #4
        Since I belong to one of the few Christian religions that do not celebrate Christmas I never heard of this story. Is it something a lot of people tell others or are you just pulling my leg?

        Comment


        • #5
          May I respectfully inquire as to which denomination that is? I'm LDS myself. Most people call us Mormons, but we do prefer LDS these days.
          "Crazy may always be open for business, but on the full moon, it has buy one get one free specials." - WishfulSpirit

          "Sometimes customers remind me of zombies, but I'm pretty sure that zombies are smarter." - MelindaJoy77

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          • #6
            Quoth earl colby pottinger View Post
            Since I belong to one of the few Christian religions that do not celebrate Christmas I never heard of this story. Is it something a lot of people tell others or are you just pulling my leg?
            Did you see the part that says: (That is a true Christmas myth that I just made up.)
            "I don't have to be petty. The Universe does that for me."

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            • #7
              Quoth earl colby pottinger View Post
              Onions, what is so special about onions all of a sudden? Is it something I should know?
              Bread sauce, maybe? I have no idea what it actually is, but I saw other people today online talking about boiling onions in milk to make bread sauce.

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              • #8
                No, I did not notice that. Sorry.

                Comment


                • #9
                  After I left work yesterday the phone calls didn't stop. The poor employee that was in yesterday evening left me notes about the calls...because many of them wanted to complain to management about us not having onions, carrots, cranberries, bread crumbs, canned gravy, browning liquid, cans of whipped cream, apple pie, pumpkin pie, pie/tart shells, and...fresh whole turkeys. I was gobsmacked over that last one. Hell, we're lucky if we have turkey snack trays, let alone an entire fresh turkey, in the store. There's last minute, and then there's that. Just...wow.

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                  • #10
                    I suspect some of those were either pranks or drunks. WHO expects, nay, demands that a gas station convenience store carry TURKEYS?
                    "Crazy may always be open for business, but on the full moon, it has buy one get one free specials." - WishfulSpirit

                    "Sometimes customers remind me of zombies, but I'm pretty sure that zombies are smarter." - MelindaJoy77

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Quoth Seanette View Post
                      WHO expects, nay, demands that a gas station convenience store carry TURKEYS?
                      Desperate people who royally screwed up?
                      "I don't have to be petty. The Universe does that for me."

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Quoth Seanette View Post
                        I suspect some of those were either pranks or drunks. WHO expects, nay, demands that a gas station convenience store carry TURKEYS?
                        You'd be surprised. One regular business day in a drugstore I happened to overhear a woman hollering at the cashier because the store didn't carry fresh vegetables. He politely recommended that she go to the supermarket at the end of the row of businesses (maybe 300 feet away) and she said, "Why should I have to walk all the way down there?" He pointed out that the supermarket likely had what she wanted, and she kept going on about how she shouldn't have to "walk all the way" to the supermarket.

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                        • #13
                          Quoth Sparklyturtle View Post
                          ..and she kept going on about how she shouldn't have to "walk all the way" to the supermarket.
                          Why, sure, lady, we'll just pop on over there and bring the entire fucking store to you.

                          "For a musician, the SNES sound engine is like using Crayola Crayons. Nobuo Uematsu used Crayola Crayons to paint the Sistine Chapel." - Jeremy Jahns (re: "Dancing Mad")
                          "The difference between an amateur and a master is that the master has failed way more times." - JoCat
                          "Thinking is difficult, therefore let the herd pronounce judgment!" ~ Carl Jung
                          "There's burning bridges, and then there's the lake just to fill it with gasoline." - Wiccy, reddit
                          "Retail is a cruel master, and could very well be the most educational time of many people's lives, in its own twisted way." - me
                          "Love keeps her in the air when she oughta fall down...tell you she's hurtin' 'fore she keens...makes her a home." - Capt. Malcolm Reynolds, "Serenity" (2005)
                          Acts of Gord – Read it, Learn it, Love it!
                          "Our psychic powers only work if the customer has a mind to read." - me

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                          • #14
                            Quoth EricKei View Post
                            Why, sure, lady, we'll just pop on over there and bring the entire fucking store to you.
                            We've arranged for it to be drop shipped for you from the An-225 Mriya. Now if you'll just step out the doors it will arriving shortly.
                            I am not an a**hole. I am a hemorrhoid. I irritate a**holes!
                            Procrastination: Forward planning to insure there is something to do tomorrow.
                            Derails threads faster than a pocket nuke.

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