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Wherein Stupidy Almost Claims a Life

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  • #61
    ok, this has proved that you can laugh hard enough to accelerate poptart through your nose to mach speeds.

    Quoth Gravekeeper View Post
    The only possible silver lining to this whole situation is there’s a small chance you’ll be shot by an air marshal at some point in the future after you try to break into the cockpit cabin to ask the pilot “Are we there yet?!”.


    Ok you’re going to have to run that by me again. Because I swear that was the precise sound my cat made this morning when she was purging her digestive sub-systems onto the carpet in my hallway.
    and for these you caused me to need a new keyboard from the spray of coffee, but helped get the poptart particles out too so thanks i guess...
    Quoth Gravekeeper View Post
    Cheese baboons. There you go. You are a primate with a multi-coloured ass that has an inexplicable lust for curdled dairy products. Edam, gouda, mozzarella, swiss, you name it. If it’s cheese and you find it then it’s going right up between your Crayola ass cheeks in some sort of weird festive dance ritual for the duration of the weekend. Then come Sunday you pick up the phone and call me while spreading your ass cheeks apart like some sort of hairy rainbow cheese sandwich.


    I hope something crawls into your house latches onto your face with its teeth and / or penis then you run around the room screaming and punching yourself in the head trying to get it off while it makes mad passionately love to your right nostril only to end up dropping your cigarette on the carpet by the drapes which slowly smolders into a tiny fire that catches onto the drapes and roars into the ceiling of your trailer home and begins to consume your abode in a raging fiery inferno which surrounds you and cuts off all exits of escape while you’re too busy trying to peel the rabidly horny creature off your face and out of your mouth to notice and by the time you finally do after beating it and yourself profusely with a sticky rolled up Penthouse magazine it’s too late you’re already surrounded by flames and the only way to escape is to dive through them, hopefully through a window that’s at least double pane glass so that it may shatter and cause severe bonus damage after which you will run away in the snow, turn around and watch everything you own slowly burn to the ground and oh did I mention you’re not wearing any pants and its -25C out with the wind chill factor.
    This is a drama-free zone; violators will be slapped. -Irving Patrick Freleigh
    my blog:http://steeledragon.wordpress.com/

    Comment


    • #62
      Quoth Gravekeeper View Post
      Me: “Ok, and your last name please?”
      SC: “Berez. B-e-r-e-zee”
      Me: “B-e-r-e-zed?”
      SC: “No, B-e-r-e-ZEE. ZEE! as in ZEBRA!!”

      Shit! They’re onto us! HIDE THE WOMEN AND THE MAPLE SYRUP.
      I was going to make a Zedpm joke, but it flopped, so...

      Dr. Rodney McKay: I built an atomic bomb for my grade six science fair exhibit.
      Lt. Aiden Ford, USMC: They let you do that up in Canada?
      I am a Blank Space for spacing purposes, ignore me.
      In order to treat someone as your equal, you first need to believe both: that they are your equal, and that you are their's.

      Comment


      • #63
        Here Beasty... Beasty... Beasty....

        Back off CSers! Gravekeeper's Mine!
        *gets out her lead filled baseball bat*

        Now sweetie, I like you and all but...them's fightin words.

        Course, it could be the good fightin' in a kiddie pool filled with cooking oil, but remember...dry, slicky...I'm the one with the bat
        My dollhouse blog.

        Blog about life

        Comment


        • #64
          I laid claim to him first and he didn't deny it, he's mine!

          Why do you have to bring violence into this, Lewis? Just bring the jello pudding and I'll bring the kiddie pool. But no outside weapons.

          Them's the Rules.
          Ridiculous 2009 Predictions: Evil Queen will beat Martha Stewart to death with a muffin pan. All hail Evil Queen! (Some things don't need elaboration.....) -- Jester

          Ridiculous 2010 Predictions: Evil Queen, after escaping prison for last years prediction, goes out and waffle irons Rachel Ray to death. -- SG15Z

          Ridiculous 2011 Prediction: Evil Queen will beat Gordon Ramsay over the head with a cast-iron skillet. -- FireHeart

          Comment


          • #65
            Oh, fine. Who am I to break the rules?

            But wedgies are legal!
            My dollhouse blog.

            Blog about life

            Comment


            • #66
              Quoth LewisLegion View Post
              Oh, fine. Who am I to break the rules?

              But wedgies are legal!
              Oh, you know what we should do? GK will get a kick outta this; we should pudding wrestle in Pink Camo!
              Ridiculous 2009 Predictions: Evil Queen will beat Martha Stewart to death with a muffin pan. All hail Evil Queen! (Some things don't need elaboration.....) -- Jester

              Ridiculous 2010 Predictions: Evil Queen, after escaping prison for last years prediction, goes out and waffle irons Rachel Ray to death. -- SG15Z

              Ridiculous 2011 Prediction: Evil Queen will beat Gordon Ramsay over the head with a cast-iron skillet. -- FireHeart

              Comment


              • #67
                TOTALLY! Pink camo swimsuits ftw!!
                My dollhouse blog.

                Blog about life

                Comment


                • #68
                  Quoth Evil Queen View Post
                  Oh, you know what we should do? GK will get a kick outta this; we should pudding wrestle in Pink Camo!
                  I'm staying the Hell out of this. =p

                  Comment


                  • #69
                    Quoth Gravekeeper View Post
                    I'm staying the Hell out of this. =p
                    We'll send ya photos.
                    Ridiculous 2009 Predictions: Evil Queen will beat Martha Stewart to death with a muffin pan. All hail Evil Queen! (Some things don't need elaboration.....) -- Jester

                    Ridiculous 2010 Predictions: Evil Queen, after escaping prison for last years prediction, goes out and waffle irons Rachel Ray to death. -- SG15Z

                    Ridiculous 2011 Prediction: Evil Queen will beat Gordon Ramsay over the head with a cast-iron skillet. -- FireHeart

                    Comment


                    • #70
                      Quoth Evil Queen View Post
                      We'll send ya photos.
                      I'll send ya the video feeds.
                      Now a member of that alien race called Management.

                      Yeah, you see that right. Pink. Harness.

                      Comment


                      • #71
                        Quoth RetailWorkhorse View Post
                        I'll send ya the video feeds.
                        Raps could start charging a per minute fee on my threads. -.-

                        Comment


                        • #72
                          Thanks guys... now I have 'Ontario Sucks' by the Arrogant Worms running through my head.

                          At least this time I wsa smart enough to put down the Coke BEFORE I started reading...
                          Arsenic is 'natural'. Hemlock is 'organic'.

                          Comment


                          • #73
                            Quoth Gravekeeper View Post
                            I think its more a lower cost of living on average. The sum total of ALL my bills per month including rent, cable, heat, water, power, phone and Internet is $680 Cdn. -.-
                            680 Canadian Dollar = 667.828 US Dollar

                            That is cheap! For me... I have $475/month in rent (I'm in a mobile home...of all places...FLORIDA) plus my cable/internet (comcast bundle), house and cellphones,water,power.
                            I don't get paid enough to kiss your a**! -Groezig 5/31/08
                            Another day...another million braincells lost...-Sarlon 6/16/08
                            Chivalry is not dead. It's just direly underappreciated. -Samaliel 9/15/09

                            Comment


                            • #74
                              Quoth Gravekeeper View Post
                              Raps could start charging a per minute fee on my threads. -.-
                              I thought you said you were staying out of this...?
                              A PSA, if I may, as well as another.

                              Comment


                              • #75
                                Memo to self, never eat a German style pretzel while reading GK's posts.

                                Comment

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