Kids say the darndest things..

[Boggles]

So, one of my particular bug bears at work is people who cannot say please or thank you.

Whenever we have kids asking stuff I am always the one prompting them to say please. This is a tale from about 18 months ago featuring me and a 9 year old which has gone down in village folklore as hilarious.


Kid:*waves tube of sweets* Oi, How much are these?
Me: How much are these WHAT?
Kid: How much are these Rolos?
Me: How much are these rolos what?
Kid: How much are these rolos mister?
Me: *in exasperation* Whats the magic word??
Kid: *thinks for a good minute or so* How much are these rolos mister Abracadabra?
Me and CoWorrker: *fits of laughter*

And that is why some people in the village still call me Mr Abracadabra!

[bloodrose]

Beautiful! That has to be one of the coolest reasons I've heard for receiving a nick name.

It reminds me of kids on Halloween who just thrust their bags at you without saying Trick or Treat. Last year while helping a friend hand out candy (people dump their kids on his block for some reason and it is a zoo that requires 6 people to hand out the candy!), another one of our friends kept trying to get the kids to say "Trick or Treat" and got to the point where he was booming loudly "No threats, no candy!"

[Foxglove8778]

Last time I handed out candy for Halloween I was demanding tricks.

"Trick or treat" they'd mumble in a half-hearted rote way.
"Trick." said I.
They mostly stared at me in blank incomprehension.
"You want candy, you do a trick for me."
More blank incomprehension.
"Oh for pity's sake. Can you rub your belly and pat your head?"
Stunned nods
"Then do that and you can have candy."

It was amusing for a while, then sad.

[RebeccaOTool]

Thats funny! Much better than the usual kid-in-a-candy-store SC.

[rerant]

I always cringe when I hear parents say, "And what's the magic word/what do you say/etc."

[Fiyero]

Last time I handed out candy for Halloween I was demanding tricks.

No way would I ask the kids in our neighbourhood to play a trick. The trick would be a breeze in my bedroom window and a brick on my bed.

I am saddened by the lack of pleases and thank yous today (that makes me sound much older than I am).

The OP's story makes it almost worth it though

[Jay 2K Winger]

Last time I handed out candy for Halloween I was demanding tricks.

"Trick or treat" they'd mumble in a half-hearted rote way.
"Trick." said I.
They mostly stared at me in blank incomprehension.
"You want candy, you do a trick for me."
More blank incomprehension.
"Oh for pity's sake. Can you rub your belly and pat your head?"
Stunned nods
"Then do that and you can have candy."

It was amusing for a while, then sad.

I'm so going to do this next time I hand out candy at home.

In past years, though, I scared the kids in the neighborhood with what I dressed up as. It wasn't some over the top gory bloody monster. I was simply wearing all black: a black shirt, black pants, black theater shoes, black gloves, and a black hooded cloak, with one of those screens in front of the face, so it looked like the hood was empty.

And I'd stand on the front porch of our house, the porch lights on behind me, the basket of candy on the ground in front of me. And I wouldn't move. I'd just stand there and wait for the kids to walk up.

Parent: "Relax, honey, it's only a statue."

I bend down to pick up the basket, and I hear the parent go, "Oh my god!"

The second year I did it, it was slightly cold that evening. Not cold enough that my health was in any danger, but cold enough you could see your breath in the light. Which made me look even scarier, this huge black THING standing there, with vapor coming out of this "empty" hood.

But yes, if I got kids who tried to just take something without saying "Trick or treat," I would hold the basket out of their reach and just wag a finger at them. The trick to the costume was to NOT SAY ANYTHING.

TL;DR -- I had fun scaring kids on Halloween. Sorry for the threadjack.