As told to me in the break-room.

[GingerBiscuit]

ANyone who works in an opticians will know sometimes we do something called a 'fields' test- this is (as far as I understand) a way to test your field of vison. It goes at a standard speed, for everyone.

Which makes this even funnier.

A: Strange woman
B: Long-suffering optician.

A: NOOOOO! Stop it! It's going to fast for my personality!
B: I'm sorry? I don't understand.
A: It's meant to be matched to my personality! It's too fast for my personality! Make it slow down!
B: It goes at the same speed for everyone.

[Pagan]

Do what now?

[Daisy]

Too fast for her personality??

I've never heard of ANY kind of test, eye or otherwise, that adjusted to your personality.

What a weirdo.

[Chanlin]

Yes because we do a detailed psychological analysis of each patient before we give them an eye exam

[gaspode]

just for the record i would like to say "I hate having field tests"

[Ironclad Alibi]

just for the record i would like to say "I hate having field tests"

This is where I say "Me too."

Although there are times I would like them go to faster so I could be done with it quicker.

[NightWatch]

I hate going to the eye doctors so much, i'd rather go to my dentist weekly if it meant I didn't have to go see the eye doc... I went the other day and he tried to put my contacts in for me. "Get your finger away from my eye stick-man!!!"

[Chromatix]

I'm the other way around - I can't put contacts in properly by myself, but I'll relax and let the optician sort out the mess.

So I carry on wearing normal glasses even though contacts would potentially work better for me, because I have that trouble with putting them in.

[LostMyMind]

I hate the field test, because they're all the same. Sit in this chair, seat your chin on this medieval torture device, and look straight ahead and click when you see a dot. By the way, we'll turn off the light but the door behind you will still light up the room distracting you.

At least, I don't need the field test anymore. I already know my side vision is getting worst.

[AdminAssistant]

field test??? bwah?

The only thing I don't like about the eye doctor is the "puff of air in the eye" test. Well, that and the fact that it's damn expensive.

[SuperB]

I hate that machine. It makes me so dizzy I refused it at my last eye appointment.

[Pagan]

The only thing I don't like about the eye doctor is the "puff of air in the eye" test.

I hate that thing. It's just disturbing as hell!

[GingerBiscuit]

Ah, we've got it lucky on the price thing. A private eye-test can be as little as £10 (about $20), or, if you fall under a few special categories- FREE.

[gaspode]

to quote John inman"I'm free"(glaucoma mothers side)

[Wembley]

ANyone who works in an opticians will know sometimes we do something called a 'fields' test- this is (as far as I understand) a way to test your field of vison. It goes at a standard speed, for everyone.

Which makes this even funnier.

A: Strange woman
B: Long-suffering optician.

A: NOOOOO! Stop it! It's going to fast for my personality!
B: I'm sorry? I don't understand.
A: It's meant to be matched to my personality! It's too fast for my personality! Make it slow down!
B: It goes at the same speed for everyone.

Matched to your personality, eh? I'm sorry, I can't fit the machine up your backside....

-Wembley