How many of y'all, especially in telcom, have had a residential-service subscriber break the rules and run a business from home? I had this one who messed her stuff up in a big, big way.
SC=Insane woman who should have biz class service
Me=Our stately hero
Now a touch of background. My company has in its Terms of Service some pretty strict restrictions about what is allowed and not. Any mention of using residential services for business is grounds for termination of all services. We do have some leeway, though, and your average eBay'er or whatnot won't be penalized.
Me: Thanks for calling *Awesome Cable Company,* my name is Jack, how may I help you?
SC: You a**h**** are costing me money!!!
Me: (Wah!?) Ok, how may I help you ma'am?
SC: I run my business from home, and my internet has been down for three days!
Me: Ok, let's see what we can do about that. (I pull her modem remotely, and it's dead. Very, very dead.)
Me: Ma'am, I can't get your modem to respond to any network side signals. We need to either swap the modem or get a tech out to you to replace it.
SC: (goes nuts) WHAT!? I WANT A G**D*** TECH OUT HERE NOW! YOU A**H**** ARE COSTING ME $500 AN HOUR IN LOST SALES! I DON'T GIVE A F*** GET ME A TECH NOW!!!!
Me: (getting angry) Ma'am, you will refrain from using profanity or I will terminate this call. Further *reads the TOS verbatim,* which means I'm supposed to turn all of your services off right now. Now, if you want, I can roll a tech or you can come and get a modem, but that tech won't be out until Monday (3 days away.)
SC: (goes nuts again) DID YOU NOT HEAR ME YOU STUPID N*****!? (btw, I'm Korean) I WANT A TECH NOW!
Me: Ma'am, this call is over. I will be disconnecting your services immediately (that is the only way we can get a tech out *today!*) and you may contact our business class division. Internet access starts at $200 a month for a dedicated 768K line. Thanks for calling Awesome Cable, have a great day.
SC: DON'T YOU HA....*click*
I put some long, long notes on that account. It was probably pretty funny when their tv's went down ten seconds later too.
SC=Insane woman who should have biz class service
Me=Our stately hero
Now a touch of background. My company has in its Terms of Service some pretty strict restrictions about what is allowed and not. Any mention of using residential services for business is grounds for termination of all services. We do have some leeway, though, and your average eBay'er or whatnot won't be penalized.
Me: Thanks for calling *Awesome Cable Company,* my name is Jack, how may I help you?
SC: You a**h**** are costing me money!!!
Me: (Wah!?) Ok, how may I help you ma'am?
SC: I run my business from home, and my internet has been down for three days!
Me: Ok, let's see what we can do about that. (I pull her modem remotely, and it's dead. Very, very dead.)
Me: Ma'am, I can't get your modem to respond to any network side signals. We need to either swap the modem or get a tech out to you to replace it.
SC: (goes nuts) WHAT!? I WANT A G**D*** TECH OUT HERE NOW! YOU A**H**** ARE COSTING ME $500 AN HOUR IN LOST SALES! I DON'T GIVE A F*** GET ME A TECH NOW!!!!
Me: (getting angry) Ma'am, you will refrain from using profanity or I will terminate this call. Further *reads the TOS verbatim,* which means I'm supposed to turn all of your services off right now. Now, if you want, I can roll a tech or you can come and get a modem, but that tech won't be out until Monday (3 days away.)
SC: (goes nuts again) DID YOU NOT HEAR ME YOU STUPID N*****!? (btw, I'm Korean) I WANT A TECH NOW!
Me: Ma'am, this call is over. I will be disconnecting your services immediately (that is the only way we can get a tech out *today!*) and you may contact our business class division. Internet access starts at $200 a month for a dedicated 768K line. Thanks for calling Awesome Cable, have a great day.
SC: DON'T YOU HA....*click*
I put some long, long notes on that account. It was probably pretty funny when their tv's went down ten seconds later too.
Comment