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  • Shoplifter Fail and Tire Kicking...

    To the young man who thought you could start dumping loads of OUR merchandise including high $$ couture jeans into your teeny-bopper store bag in full view of our fitting room attendant, you fail.

    It didn't help that you left the VERY IDENTIFIABLE high $$ couture jeans HANGING OUT of your bag, with our store price tags hanging out. Massive fail.

    And when we hauled your butt down to LP office and you refused to give your name to our LP person and the cop who came to write you up, Code Blue fail.

    But the best??? When you had your pockets FULL of your friend MaryJane and tried to say it wasn't yours????? Complete and UTTER FAIL! That's why you had to do the 'walk of shame' (completely cuffed, with cop holding onto the cuffs) through the MIDDLE of our store. Enjoy jail, asshat.

    And to the three separate customers who asked for help looking at high $$ sunglasses, ask my opinions and expertise on the best shapes, styles and optics and we help you decide which is the best sunglass for you and when I go to get the case for it, you decide to inform me that you weren't actually buying them, you were going to take my information to your 'buddy', 'sister', 'friend of a friend' and have them get you the sunglasses for 'free' or 'practially free'? You suck. I actually got pissed enough at the last customer that I slapped the case shut and inquired of the 'gentleman' how he got so lucky as to have a sunglass fairy. Man gaped for a few seconds, then his story became that he 'knew the sunglass rep'. Well, so do I, bucko. Enjoy squinting outside in this bright, bright sunshine.
    Just to cut off any helpful suggestions: This woman was not blind, nor disabled. She was just a bitch. - Boozy

  • #2
    A friend of mine, when working as a security guard, found the lovely Mary Jane in someone's pockets. His ingenious reply?

    "These ain't my pants, man!"

    ...

    Points for creativity. But you still lose.
    We have enough youth. How about a "Fountain of Smart"?

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    • #3
      "aint my pants"?

      What is that? The Sisterhood of the Traveling PotPants?

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      • #4
        "These ain't my pants, man!"
        That was in a movie. Idol Hands. Funny.
        Miyon

        Seduce, Let Loose, The Vision and The Void - Coil

        All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain - Blade Runner

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        • #5
          Quoth PepperElf View Post
          "aint my pants"?

          What is that? The Sisterhood of the Traveling PotPants?

          Thanks for the giggle PepperElf I needed that!
          I used to be disgusted... Now I'm just amused

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