The car will crash!

[Jack Doe]

Got this one first/second hand. Angry lady, calls in because her services are out.

The players:
Me: Awesome Cable Company TV and HSD guru
CCL: Crazy car lady
AH: Friend from another team

Me: *Scripted greeting...* This is Jack, how may I assist you?
CCL: *screams Name/Address/Phone number and last 4 in about five seconds*
Me: Excuse me? You said that pretty quickly ma'am, could you repeat your name and address?
CCL: *Screams same, but in a loud "You dumb fucking 4 year old" tone of voice and rate.* And I know you're going to tell me my fucking tv is out because of an outage and I'm going to tell your dumb ass that there aren't any techs on my street fixing it!
Me: Ma'am, please stop using profanity. *At this point, my system had her account, but I'm going to screw with her for being a douche.* Could you please repeat your name and address to confirm I have the correct account?
CCL: Are you fucking stupid? I...
Me: *interrupts* Again, ma'am, please stop using profanity or I'll be forced to terminate this call.
CCL: *Screams something unintelligible, would best be described as a color or flavor, and hangs up.*
AH: What the hell was that about?
Me: I don't know, but I'm not calling her back!

Now, for the car part. Her notes previously said that on not one, not two, but three previous calls, she'd threatened to take her car, run over as many Awesome Cable employees as she could find, then drive it into the building. Our director of security will be visiting her with the Sheriff's department in tow.

[bainsidhe]

It's said that you usually catch more flies with honey. Guess she thought it said battery acid.

[Crazeyal]

I don't have many nice things to say about *MY* local cable company... but I just didn't re-sign up with them when I moved... What IS it with these mouth-breathers?? It's not some cathartic venting, they always sound angrier and angrier... Meh.. some of them DO pop a blood vessel and die...

[KnitShoni]

Oh my GOD! It's freaking CABLE! It's not that...wait...this is CS. Of COURSE it's that serious. Silly me.

[Darkwish]

I'd love to watch that conversation she has with the cops and security! (I'd even bring a folding chair and bucket of popcorn!)

Why wasn't her account closed after making those threats?

[blas]

I feel a lot better about myself now. I've never gotten that upset at the cable company.

[PepperElf]

all i can say is... i'd love to watch that one

[Imogene]

It's said that you usually catch more flies with honey.

While it is said that way, it's not true. Put out a bowl of vinegar and a bowl of honey, the bowl of vinegar will attract more flies.

[BookstoreEscapee]

I'd love to watch that conversation she has with the cops and security! (I'd even bring a folding chair and bucket of popcorn!)

Don't have any chairs, but...

[HawaiianShirts]

CCL: *Screams same, but in a loud "You dumb fucking 4 year old" tone of voice and rate.* And I know you're going to tell me my fucking tv is out because of an outage and I'm going to tell your dumb ass that there aren't any techs on my street fixing it!

That suggests to me that she'd called at least a few minutes before and was informed there was a local outage. I can imagine her marching to her front window, glancing up and down the street looking for a Cable Company vehicle or employee while tapping her pink-fuzzy-slippered foot impatiently for about four minutes, not seeing what she was hoping to see, trying the TV again, and, finding that the outage had not yet been fixed and knowing she deserves much better service than this, getting mad and picking up the phone again.

I guess it never occurred to her that an outage may not be localized to just her street or just her house or that the problem might be caused by something somewhere farther away. I thought only really little kids believed that their street was the whole world.

Stupid EW. Get dressed and go for a walk or something. The fresh air will either make you calmer and happier or send your body into such a state of shock that you'll drop dead in the driveway. Either way, the rest of us will be better off.

[smileyeagle1021]

you know... I've been less than please with the comcraptic service that I have... that said... better than having to deal with a satelitte dish 3 stories up... so guess what I do, I try to be as pleasant as possible with the reps so that they will want to help me first...

[nomorecarts]

my local cable company makes me seriously want Comcast. so does directv, the only reliable TV in my town is a DVD player