I am not rude. You only think that because you're an idiot.

[elysia]

SC: Hi, how much to ship a package?
Me: Would it need any insurance?
SC: Uuhhhh, well its really old but I'm not sure how much its worth.
Me: Where would you need to ship it to?
SC: I don't know.
Me: Do you know the zip code?
SC: No.
Me: Do you know what city? I could look up the zip code.
SC: Uh, no....
Me: Well, do you know which state?
SC: No, I don't really know, can you just tell me how much to ship a box really far?
Me: Ok, lets say you want to send it to New York, thats all the way across the country... how big is your box?
SC: Uhhhhhh... well its like this big I think. *gestures a box in the air*
Me: You don't know the dimensions?
SC: Not really, but its about this wide *gesture* and this tall *gesture*
Me: Do you know how much it weighs?
SC: Its pretty heavy.
Me: Hmmm. Ok so we don't know where its going, we don't know how big it is, we don't know how much it weighs, we don't know if it needs insurance. I'm not sure I could give you an estimate without that information.
SC: Can you give me a ballpark?
Me: I don't really know anything about the package, so that would be kinda hard, hmm, if you go home and measure it and find out where it needs to go you could call us and I'd be able to give you a pretty accurate estimate.
SC: Don't you have a chart with your rates or something?
Me: No, the cost is determined by size, weight, and zip code....
SC: **SIGH** All I wanted was an estimate and you're not being very helpful at all! I can't believe you don't have a chart that shows your rates! The post office has one.
Me: Well, I'm sorry but we don't have a chart because there are too many variables that go into figuring the cost.
SC: GOD!!! Like what?!
Me: ....like size, weight, and zip code.
SC: Thats too complicated. Well I'm sorry you couldnt help me and I'm sorry you were rude to me. *exit*

This same person orders a pizza for delivery without telling the pizza place what size, what kind of crust, or which toppings, and buys plane tickets for unknown destinations at unknown times of the year. This is a miracle worker, and god forbid you stand in the way of his miracles, or you, sir, are rude.

[Apathy]

You should have just told him that it would be $700/mile.

[Jay 2K Winger]

You should have just told him that it would be $700/foot.

Fixed that for amusement's sake and to factor in the F.I.T. (F'n Idiot Tax)

[DGoddessChardonnay]

Have a drink . . . sometimes it helps.

*sending virtual bottle of wine*

I wonder if we could campaign to get that F.I.T. mandated by law. . .

[karma_gypsy]

I don't even think a chart would even help in this case ...

And how heavy is pretty heavy? It could be 10, 20 or 50 lbs... And then there's how it'll be shipped ... overnight, ground, three-day, etc.

[auntiem]

I get the travel version of this.
Caller: "How much is it to go to Mexico?"
Me: trys to ask for dates / destination / room category / budget
Caller: "Listen, I just want to know how much to go to Mexico!"
Me: repeat questions ad nauseum until...
Caller: "You don't seem to know anything!!!!eleventy! I'm going to call someone who knows what they are talking about!"
Me: Good luck with that

[Mr Hero]

I'm going to need the weight and the girth.
3
3 what
3 girth units

[Animae]

wow. that's some stupid right there.

[Snowbird]

Um, the post office needs the same information to be able to give an estimate, with the exception of their select few 'one price for all destinations' boxes.

If anyone was rude, it was him. He wasted your time because HE wasn't prepared. It's not that hard to measure a box and weigh it, nor to write the info down with the zip code. But! that would take the ability to think.

[kzc]

I'm going to need the weight and the girth.
3
3 what
3 girth units

...and they'll probably fit on a dolly!

[Kaylyn]

I'm going to need the weight and the girth.
3
3 what
3 girth units

Brian Regan FTW!!!!

[AriRashkae]

And how heavy is pretty heavy? It could be 10, 20 or 50 lbs...

After my C-section, the doc told me "No heavy lifting." I asked him what would be considered heavy, and he asked me what I considered "heavy". I told him "about 50 lbs." and he was and said "more like 8!" At which point I asked him if I was expected to never lift a gallon of milk, or my son after he'd been nursing for a week. He backpedaled after that and grudgingly allowed me 10.

[Nyoibo]

Yeah, heavy for some people I know is about 10-15 lbs, I consider heavy lifting to be anything over 100 lbs.

[Dips]

After my C-section, the doc told me "No heavy lifting." I asked him what would be considered heavy,

An experienced doctor would phrase that the way mine did after my c-section:

"Don't lift anything heavier than your baby..."

Back on topic...

We have overseas customers asking for shipping quotes.

In order to provide a quote I need to know how many units they want shipped and the shipping address. Most people just give us the information and I give them a quote. But some people either don't know what they want or don't know where they are...

[Primer]

Before my rotator cuff injuries, "heavy" was over 75 lbs. Now, it's closer to 4 lbs.