National Lampoon's trip to Heaven

[Voldine]

That, my friend, is full of win.

If she hadn't previously specified 'White', Mild cheddar and Colby-Jack would have been given as choices as well.

Oh and she was, shall we say, a rather large lump of bleached flour dough, with a visible thong line above her shorts where the shirt she was mercifully wearing didn't quite meet her waistband. Now, I'm not exactly skinny, but I know what I should and should not be wearing.

Chances are, if you're over 140 pounds, you should not be wearing a visible thong. It tends to make people wonder if there's enough fabric to actually cover anything. And now I've gone from deli clerk to fashion critic and deliverer of speculative images that shall require for those not lucky enough to have a lovely little mental device that allows one to conjure up such delightful imagery without ever actually forcing the mind to picture the anatomical implications.

[Gerrinson]

Add me to the hates American cheese list!

And might I say you stop at .05 pounds over? I guess I need to go shop at that deli. The local grocery store is lucky to get it within .25 pounds. Seriously. I asked for a pound of meat, I get .78 pounds. Have her top it off, ask for HALF a pound of cheese, which she repeats back to me, and I get .83 pounds of cheese. Granted, I can always find use for extra cheese, so I took it after pointing out that I wanted only 1/2 a pound. She blew me off with a 'Whatever' so I complained to the SM. .83 is close enough 1/2 a pound if you're dealing with say, a ton of bricks. But not when your trying to give out 1/2 a pound of cheese.

[Voldine]

Add me to the hates American cheese list!

And might I say you stop at .05 pounds over? I guess I need to go shop at that deli. The local grocery store is lucky to get it within .25 pounds. Seriously. I asked for a pound of meat, I get .78 pounds. Have her top it off, ask for HALF a pound of cheese, which she repeats back to me, and I get .83 pounds of cheese. Granted, I can always find use for extra cheese, so I took it after pointing out that I wanted only 1/2 a pound. She blew me off with a 'Whatever' so I complained to the SM. .83 is close enough 1/2 a pound if you're dealing with say, a ton of bricks. But not when your trying to give out 1/2 a pound of cheese.

We had a good easy system to deal with, unless the blades had recently been sharpened. Regular setting for American cheese was 1.5 on the dial. 20 slices at 1.5 was about a pound, +- .10 depending on blade sharpness and just how warm it was in the deli for the cheese to start melting to the blade as it cut.

Different cheeses had similar but different tricks with the only true pain being Lorraine brand cheese. So full of holes you'd think it was a sponge and lighter than anything else where a pound looked like an impossible amount.

[Seraph]

Wait...WIC people in your state get cheese and ham from the deli?! Waitamin....they get HAM?!

[Boozy]

Oh and she was, shall we say, a rather large lump of bleached flour dough, with a visible thong line above her shorts where the shirt she was mercifully wearing didn't quite meet her waistband. Now, I'm not exactly skinny, but I know what I should and should not be wearing.

I don't care what you weigh, visible thong panties are tacky. It doesn't matter if you weigh 100 pounds or 300.

The suck here is not about her weight nor her underwear, so let's keep this on topic please.

[Akasa]

Not one of those reasons explains why deli staff didn't simply weigh those items to come in just under a pound. I mean, yeah, it's possible that someone NOT on WIC would buy that stuff on the specified date, but it's far more likely that they were WIC customers - just seems like common sense to assume that they are and make everyone's life a little bit easier.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not misunderstanding deli life or anything. I spent three years working in a grocery store deli and slicing for the unwashed masses. I just can't see why this would even be an issue if it's a known problem with such a simple solution.

I think #5 was a good reason.

[mariamousie1]

Wow. You are awesome. I love you for the second story.