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Today's story concerns Double Bag Bitch. Most of us at "Aid of Rite" hate her because she's an old crotchety bitch. Picture: LOUD red lipstick, bushy dyed black/brown hair, thousands of wrinkles and a permanent frown. Always grabs a basket and shopping cart and throws all of her stuff into the basket which she puts on top of the cart. Never a word of greeting, just "Can you DOUBLE BAG this please?" repeated at least twice through the transaction and always for even the lightest items, like a pack of gum.
My hatred for Double Bag Bitch has been renewed because she's discovered a new trick-throwing things at you. Yep, tosses everything at you and demands you double bag everything. So while we're bagging stuff, she hangs onto her Foodstamp card and waits until the very end to toss it to you. She always tosses it to you and snaps "I'm left handed." The Sigcap/card swipe device is right there in front of her.
*golf clap* Good for you that you're left handed! So am I! I just use my right hand to slide my card, though. We were given two hands and there's no reason why I can't use either one.
No. Double Bag Bitch is a special snowflake because she's left handed. And she doesn't take kindly to being shown that she can use both hands. So you must do it for her.
She uses foodstamps and in our state we can use the Cash option to get cash back. She ALWAYS selects cash and gets bent out of shape when she has to use the pen to punch in her numbers. No, fingers don't work. Yes, it's clearly marked. Yes you must use the pen. And even better she always gets trip ped up at the Cash Back screen. "Well what do I hit if I don't want any?"
"Hit the none button!"
"Where?"
Jesus H. Christ it's the GIANT button at the bottom of the screen, IN COLOR. Yes, you must use the pen to hit it. And you must hit the Yes button at the next screen to continue!
As a final insult, Double Bag Bitch leaves basket in cart right at the register to block traffic. Double bonus points if there's a line 500 feet long. Triple Bonus points if she purposefully turns it sideways.
BITCH.
My hatred for Double Bag Bitch has been renewed because she's discovered a new trick-throwing things at you. Yep, tosses everything at you and demands you double bag everything. So while we're bagging stuff, she hangs onto her Foodstamp card and waits until the very end to toss it to you. She always tosses it to you and snaps "I'm left handed." The Sigcap/card swipe device is right there in front of her.
*golf clap* Good for you that you're left handed! So am I! I just use my right hand to slide my card, though. We were given two hands and there's no reason why I can't use either one.
No. Double Bag Bitch is a special snowflake because she's left handed. And she doesn't take kindly to being shown that she can use both hands. So you must do it for her.
She uses foodstamps and in our state we can use the Cash option to get cash back. She ALWAYS selects cash and gets bent out of shape when she has to use the pen to punch in her numbers. No, fingers don't work. Yes, it's clearly marked. Yes you must use the pen. And even better she always gets trip ped up at the Cash Back screen. "Well what do I hit if I don't want any?"
"Hit the none button!"
"Where?"
Jesus H. Christ it's the GIANT button at the bottom of the screen, IN COLOR. Yes, you must use the pen to hit it. And you must hit the Yes button at the next screen to continue!
As a final insult, Double Bag Bitch leaves basket in cart right at the register to block traffic. Double bonus points if there's a line 500 feet long. Triple Bonus points if she purposefully turns it sideways.
BITCH.
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