How to be a hotel guest.

[Demonoid Phenomenon]

I wrote something like this some time ago and posted it on a similar site (something about '...cents'? Ahem.)
Anyway, I may try to find it and reproduce it here.
Instead of hotel guests, though, it was directed at customers in general.

[phillippbo]

Up until this day, I've always wondered why they upgraded 4 rooms instead of moving the loudmouth.

You must not have run into me, then. While I do not work in a motel, I can tell you that if I had the choice to do a free upgrade for several guests who are nice or one whiny, obnoxious, self-entitled you-know-what, the nice guests are getting it. I don't care how much trouble it is for me, or how much money it might cost the company (within reason), but the entitlement whore will get exactly what they want: the problem is taken care of. The big, mean "biker gang" is gone and you can sleep in peace in your downgraded room. Have a nice day!

[Slave to the Phone]

True.

But that still doesn't stop me from resenting those who actually do have that time off. (snip) Before i started working, situations like these never even occured to me. I thought everybody got Christmas off, hell even Scrooge gave Cratchet at least half a day off.

My point is that when, eventually, I have a real job and i come into contact with these poor people, i'll give them the respect they deserve... something 90% of the population doesn't seem to recognize.

This is the reason I won't even buy a newspaper on a major holiday. I stop my friends from shopping on holidays as well. If enough people stopped shopping on holidays, the store owners would stop forcing people to work holidays. Its my own, futile little boycott and I'm quite sure that nobody notices.

Until I read this discussion, I never knew that some people voluntarily stayed at hotels/motels on a major holdiay. Why would anyone do such a thing? Don't they have any family or friends to spend the night with?

[QUOTE=phillippbo;] While I do not work in a motel, I can tell you that if I had the choice to do a free upgrade for several guests who are nice or one whiny, obnoxious, self-entitled you-know-what, the nice guests are getting it. [QUOTE]

This has been a very educational thread for me. I didn't realize that hotel front line folks had so much "power".

My major contribution to the big, mean "biker gang" (we always laugh for days or even weeks when people react that way...come to think of it, I'm now laughing about something that happened 3 years ago), was to teach them to overtip.

I like seeing people smile when they see us pulling into their parking lot. I like it even more when waitresses stage mock fights to get our table. I'm flattered beyond words to think that we got moved into the good parking area because I taught them so well.

The guys won't be so thrilled, tho. They tend to strut when they think someone considers them to be threatening bad asses. The other SO's will laugh their butts off when I tell them about this thread!

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

True.

But that still doesn't stop me from resenting those who actually do have that time off. On top of that, I resent the managers who disappear on holidays and the co-workers who decide to quit on Christmas morning. Before i started working, situations like these never even occured to me. I thought everybody got Christmas off, hell even Scrooge gave Cratchet at least half a day off.

My point is that when, eventually, I have a real job and i come into contact with these poor people, i'll give them the respect they deserve... something 90% of the population doesn't seem to recognize.

I agree. There is no legitimate reason my store has to be open on holidays like Thanksgiving or Easter.

The world is not going to come to an end if you can't come in on Thanksgiving Day and pick up a bottle of detergent, a bottle of shampoo, or anything else.

My state has no blue laws or prohibitions governing requiring stores to be closed on holidays. The only day out of the entire year we are closed is Christmas Day, and eventually that will change. Someday corporate will do a test and have certain stores open on Christmas Day, and find some way to justify being open even if nobody comes by to shop.

I suspect the reason our stores are open all these holidays is because Wal-mart is closed; therefore why not get their customers into our store if they absolutely, positively, need to go shopping those days?

Here's why not: because it's dead on those days. We'll have maybe one hour of steady traffic and then it drops off. Holidays are about the most boring days at work. Sure, the pay is nice, but I don't like standing around or wandering around aimlessly so I take those days off whenever I can.

[Getoutofmylobby]

This has been a very educational thread for me. I didn't realize that hotel front line folks had so much "power".

Yeah, we can do pretty much whatever we want when it comes to moving people around, rates (sorta), amenities, etc.

What we can't do is:

1. Build extra rooms out of duct tape and cardboard when the hotel is sold out
2. Take someone's guaranteed reservation and give it to you if we're sold out. That's why its called "Guaranteed."
3. Lower the city's hospitality tax rate (14% in St Louis).
4. Reverse time so that you can mention the 3 rollaway beds you will need on your reservation that we were mean enough to give away before you arrived.
5. Walk across the street to McDonalds and bring you 3 orders of Chicken Selects.
6. Search each and every corner of time and space for "Dr. Andy Wilkinson" even though the last 9 times you called, I told you he wasn't staying here.
7. Watch over your grandmother as she sits in the lobby while your family goes out to eat (true story).
8. Make the high-speed Internet download any faster.
9. Mail you the "personal item" you left behind in your nightstand. (Unfortunately, we throw the dildos away.)
10. Get in my car to pick you up at the airport after my shift (we don't have an airport shuttle.

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

9. Mail you the "personal item" you left behind in your nightstand. (Unfortunately, we throw the dildos away.)

I'm guessing you were actually asked to do this?

[Kogarashi]

I suspect the reason our stores are open all these holidays is because Wal-mart is closed; therefore why not get their customers into our store if they absolutely, positively, need to go shopping those days?

Dang, IPF, where do you live that there are Wal-Mart stores that close for holidays other than Christmas? Every WM I've been at/worked for has been open every single day of the year except Christmas Day and the evening of Christmas Eve.

[Jester]

Wow I didn't realize that there were more hotel employees on here I thought there was only one other.

Even though I seem to be the Unofficial Official CS Bartender (Hey, Raps, here me bucking for that promotion?), I do work in a hotel…as, of course, a bartender. Sometimes makes for some very interesting situations. Trust me, when those happen, they will be posted here.

Until I read this discussion, I never knew that some people voluntarily stayed at hotels/motels on a major holdiay. Why would anyone do such a thing? Don't they have any family or friends to spend the night with?

Not everyone necessarily lives near all of their family or even LIKES all of their family. Some people need to travel to be near to their family or friends on those holidays, and there may not always be space on the couch for them…or they may not want to stay on the couch. Not all holidays are as important to everyone as they are to others. So while you may wonder why someone would travel on Christmas, to some people, that is the perfect time to get away.

To others it is the perfect time to work. For instance, I work on some of the more obvious holidays so that I can NOT be working on days I find more important. To wit, I have Six Holy Days: Super Bowl Sunday, St. Patrick’s Day, my birthday (June 8, mark it on your calendar!), Halloween (or Fantasy Fest if I am living in Key West as I have the last seven years), the day after Thanksgiving (Arizona/Arizona State football game) and New Year’s Eve. These are The Days That Jester Does Not Work. To get out of working said days, I will and have worked Thanksgiving, Christmas Eve, Christmas, Easter, and other such days that other people want off. They are happy that someone will work those days so they can have off, management is happy that someone will volunteer for those days, and I am happy because I am getting MY days off.

[Antisocial_Worker]

9. Mail you the "personal item" you left behind in your nightstand. (Unfortunately, we throw the dildos away.)

We won't mail them, but we'll keep them in case you want to pick them up. We'll even nod in assent when you pretend that your cockring is a bracelet, as in, "Thanks for finding my bracelet! I'm so glad you held my bracelet here for me to pick up. Well, I'll just pick up my bracelet here and be on my way! Thanks again!"

This happened to me once before. Poor guy probably knew he didn't have a chance in hell of making anyone think that ring was anything other than what it was, but he did try.

[Seanette]

We won't mail them, but we'll keep them in case you want to pick them up. We'll even nod in assent when you pretend that your cockring is a bracelet, as in, "Thanks for finding my bracelet! I'm so glad you held my bracelet here for me to pick up. Well, I'll just pick up my bracelet here and be on my way! Thanks again!"

This happened to me once before. Poor guy probably knew he didn't have a chance in hell of making anyone think that ring was anything other than what it was, but he did try.

Yeah, right, guy. No one's wrists are THAT small.

[AFpheonix]

Until I read this discussion, I never knew that some people voluntarily stayed at hotels/motels on a major holdiay. Why would anyone do such a thing? Don't they have any family or friends to spend the night with?

Maybe families' or friends' houses are already full and there's nowhere to stay, or perhaps they're visiting parents or grandparents in homes? Or perhaps they'll be there long enough that it would be too much of an imposition on their family, or perhaps they just flat out don't get along well enough to be under the same roof for that amount of time. It's also a truth that some people just cannot sleep on hideabeds, not if they want to be able to walk the next day, so need to stay somewhere with a real bed.

9. Mail you the "personal item" you left behind in your nightstand. (Unfortunately, we throw the dildos away.)

I think that's an item I'd just as soon replace, rather than try to get back from somewhere.....

[Barefootgirl]

9. Mail you the "personal item" you left behind in your nightstand. (Unfortunately, we throw the dildos away.)

An hotel in Boston once mailed back all my underwear that I had forgotten to pack and left in the dresser drawer. I thought that was very nice of them. It wasn't expensive underwear, but it was mine and I was pleased to have them back !

International Knicker Deliveries R Us...

[DGoddessChardonnay]

Yeah, right, guy. No one's wrists are THAT small.

So glad I was observing Rule #1.

Maybe families' or friends' houses are already full and there's nowhere to stay, or perhaps they're visiting parents or grandparents in homes? Or perhaps they'll be there long enough that it would be too much of an imposition on their family, or perhaps they just flat out don't get along well enough to be under the same roof for that amount of time. It's also a truth that some people just cannot sleep on hideabeds, not if they want to be able to walk the next day, so need to stay somewhere with a real bed.

Or, because of differences between parents and son/daughter in law, it's either the parents stay at a hotel or motel OR there's going to be bloodshed (Guess it's cheaper for the parents in law to stay at a hotel rather than pay for both a double funeral AND lawyer fees for the spouse.)

[Jester]

It's also a truth that some people just cannot sleep on hideabeds, not if they want to be able to walk the next day, so need to stay somewhere with a real bed.

Fortunately for me, I was never one of those people. Heck, growing up in my family, there was me, the two sisters, and the parents. So when we traveled, and stayed in one room with two double beds, can anyone guess who got the rollaway Every Single Time? Yep. Yours truly. But I never complained about it, because (a) I didn’t know any different, and (b) I got my own damn bed. At seven with two siblings, that is a big thing, especially when you are NOT the oldest!

And to this day, I can literally sleep anywhere, and I think that is partially because of my youth on rollaway beds. I have slept, comfortably, on carpeted floors, couches, love seats, recliners, papasan chairs, pool lounge chairs, car back seats, and even many many times in the back of the Jestermobile (midsize SUV) when I spent a year and a half traveling the U.S.

Basically, if it isn’t a hardwood floor or concrete, I can probably sleep on it. And I am not even sure about that last part, due to a few drunken times when I found the sidewalk a lovely place to rest…..

[Getoutofmylobby]

We won't mail them, but we'll keep them in case you want to pick them up. We'll even nod in assent when you pretend that your cockring is a bracelet

That has got to be one of the funniest words in the English language. Cockring.

Haven't found any of those yet but we do get truckloads of condoms in different stages of use as well as a deflated blow-up doll. Fortunately, nobody asked for that one back.