"The store, the store, the store is on fire..."

[ditchdj]

Let's sing it the SC way.....


"The store, the store, the store is on fire

The store, the store, the store is on fire

We don't need to stop shopping, let the m*** f**** burn.

Burn m**** f******, BURRRRNNN!"

[Antisocial_Worker]

Reminds me of a story I've mentioned here a few times.

Long story short, my mom worked for many years at a department store. Two exciting things happened one night:

The main event of the evening was a guy chasing another guy through the store with a gun.

The secondary event of the evening was that someone took advantage of that chaos to set the children's department on fire. Fortunately, they got it out before it could do more than smoke up the store.

[Mike Taylor]

I was in the middle of a similar situation down here in South Florida a couple of years ago. They evacuated us. I heard later that the person responsible was arrested for doing the same thing across the street at the Beall's store.

[Retail Associate]

Hmmm, at Meijer the fire doors have signs that say they have to be pushed for fifteen seconds before they will open.

Another tidbit about Meijer, if there is a fire they actually expect us employees to grab a fire extinquisher and go battle the flames.

Like that's gonna happen.

We have drills quite often where they page Dept 75 to random area of store (or whatever the hell the number is for fire) over the intercom three times. When we hear that we're supposed to get an extinquisher and go to that area.

As far as I know, no one ever does it except maybe a manager or two.

[Bradester]

Is anyone else thinking of Tobias' commercial audition from Arrested Development?

"OH GOD, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE... sale."

[Gibbo]

What the hell were people saying to the cops and firemen when they were told the building was on fire.

[Despina83]

Hmmm, at Meijer the fire doors have signs that say they have to be pushed for fifteen seconds before they will open.

[PepperElf]

People were actually ARGUING with the cops and firemen at the doors

This of course is secret code for "please arrest me"
or "please blow me back with a firehose"

either one will work

[KiaKat]

Several days later someone threw a lit cigarette in the bus stop garbage can outside our store causing a small fire. The owner of the store was trying to put the fire out so, in my very best effort to be of assitance, I grabbed my fire hat, put it on and ran around the parking lot waving my arms and making fire truck noises...

*snerk*

*giggles madly*

*falls off chair*

*rolls around laughing*

That's BRILLIANT. I love it.

Also reminds me of a few weeks ago. We were sitting in the store, as always, and noticed that there was a bit of an orange-reddish glow coming through the frosted windows...and then that there were lots of sirens...

And...they were all stopping at our corner...

My coworker went outside, looked around, came in, and said... "someone set the trash can across the street on fire."

Perfectly matter-of-fact, no confusion in her voice, no "WTF face," nothing.

I, of course, was utterly confused, and wondering who the *hell* would do something like that.

And, wouldn't you expect city sanitation to take care of it? Nope. It sat there for three days till someone called the city services line.

[morgana]

Some people are just the wrong kind of amazing, aren't they? I've said it before and I'll say it again, if I hear a fire alarm get out of my way. Or you'll have footprints on your back. I've been in a building fire.

If the SC's want to stay in a burning building, or go in past the police and firemen, I say let 'em. As someone on here says in their sig, "Stupid should hurt!"

[Imprl59]

Bloodhound Gang ftw! Do I get a cookie?

Hmmm.. maybe half a cookie. Bloodhound Gang just used it (along with about 20 others). The original was Rock Master Scott & the Dynamic Three in 1984.

[bainsidhe]

Our store's alarm has a tendencey to go off every other month or so. Only once in the last three years has there been a fire (one of the vents over an exit, of all things), but every time it's a hassle trying to get customers to exit. Every. Single. Time. Nowadays I leave it for managers to bother with. I got tired of getting sniped at "I've already been told!" when I tell a customer they need to evacuate. "But it's myyyyy cart of groceries, I'm not going to steeeaaaallll it!" a customer would declare while trying to wheel their full cart outside. And customers would still check out. And cashiers would still check them out. Yeah, I know. Chances are pretty unlikely that the loud sirens and flashing lights mean a real, honest to goodness fire. But c'mon already.

And the stepping past fire trucks and hoses? Well, that's pretty priceless.

[ralerin]

There was smoke and filling the place and people would NOT LEAVE!!! There were actually people who refused to leave until they were checked out.

Holy cow.

Tsk...I wish you could've left them in there. who are you to argue with natural selection, as others have said.

My friends and I begin to sing as we go to the car:

"The store, the store, the store is on fire!
We don't need no water let the mother f_cker burn,
Burn mother f_cker burn.."

Bloodhound Gang ftw! Do I get a cookie?

[AirHostess]

People who are stupid enough to want to carry on shopping during a fire deserve what they get. Natural selection for you!

Personally, if I was on a burning plane and people were fussing about with their bags rather than evacuating...I would just get myself out of there!

[Sheldonrs]

You yell "FIRE" and SCs tack on the word "SALE" and keep shopping.

"Escuse me! This shirt is burning. I WANT A DISCOUNT!!!!!"