worst of the worst (warning: lots of foul language)

[vacation_rentals_suck]

I gave lady her after hours lockbox earlier and apparently unknown to me she owed a balance so after I told her her lockbox info, the check in desk changed it because she had a balance

Guest: Dave, you gave me my lockbox earlier and it's empty

Me: ok lemme see, it looks like you have a $200 balance

Guest: why the fuck didnt you tell me that when I called earlier?

Me: because I didnt know, they changed it after I called

Guest: who the fuck is they?

Me: the folks at the check in desk

Guest: well I didnt talk to them, I talked to you and you told me this was my lockbox

Me: well ma'am, I need to collect the balance before I give you the lockbox

Guest: fine

so she gives me a credit card number and I give her her lockbox

Guest: ok Dave, I am writing to the CEO of this company about you, you have ruined my vacation you incompetent son of a bitch

Me: ma'am I am ending this calll

CLICK

She calls back

Guest: excuse me, but I was talking to you and you hung up. why?

Me: because you called me an incompetent son of a bitch

Guest: well you know what? the truth hurts

CLICK

She calls back

Guest: Dave, you hang this phone up on me again and I swear to God, I will blow up. You need to tell your manager that you were very rude and unkind to me and hung up on me. My husband is livid and if you were here, he'd beat the shit out of you. I hope you die. I hope you rot in hell, you've ruined our vacation, you mothert fucking bastard and hang up this phone and I will eat you alive when I call back.....you have no idea how you've ruined my vacation.......aaaaaa


She calls again

My coworker: Dave, she is asking for you

Me: I am not talking to her

coworker: she says if you dont talk to her, she is calling the police

Me: ok let her

Coworker: Dave, please talk to this woman

Me: hang up on her

so this time her sister calls back, who is seemingly more calm

Sister: Dave, all my sister wants is for you to explain to her why you didnt tell her she owed a balance and you keep hanging up on her. She is sitting here crying right now. Youve got her very upset. This is our vacation and she cant even enjoy herself because of you.

Me: I am certainly sorry this happened

Sister: no, thats not sufficient.....I want a personal apology from you and an admission of your failure to do your job

Me: ma'am you got your keys and got in the unit, a mistake was made and I am sorry

Sister: no Dave, this was your fault......you need to take responsibility for it. Thats why my sister is upset. I want you to come down here, Dave, and apologize to our family for the heartache you've caused us

Me: no

Sister: ok well, your job is customer service and I am sure your boss wont be happy when he hears you refused us service

Me: ok

Sister: you know what, I am through with you.....just go home tonight and think about what you've done and how you can give customer service in the future...ok?

Me: ok

Click

[Pagan]

To both of those raging hosebeasts, I offer a heartfelt

BITE ME, BITE ME HARD!

Seriously....wow! To have that sheltered of a life that one little, minor, easily solved glitch ruin the entire vacation?

[Talon]

Someone please, cue the world's smallest violin. And send the waah-ambulance. Say, do we have a wahh-mbulance emote?

[tropicsgoddess]

Someone please, cue the world's smallest violin. And send the waah-ambulance. Say, do we have a wahh-mbulance emote?

Dispatched....


and on it's way to the SC's location complete with .

[Akasa]

She calls back

Guest: Dave, you hang this phone up on me again and I swear to God, I will blow up. You need to tell your manager that you were very rude and unkind to me and hung up on me. My husband is livid and if you were here, he'd beat the shit out of you. I hope you die. I hope you rot in hell, you've ruined our vacation, you mothert fucking bastard and hang up this phone and I will eat you alive when I call back.....you have no idea how you've ruined my vacation.......aaaaaa

After the bolded part I'd have hung up again. Threatening me.

[csdrone]

"Ma'am, since you threatened me with bodily harm, here is how this will go. First you will have a knock at the door. Open it and go with the nice men and ladies who have shiney new bracelets for you. They will have an orange jumpsuit for you as this conversation has been logged and is being sent to the Police. Since it is a holiday weekend, you will spend the next 3 1/2 days as a guest of the city/county. The judge will see you for arraignment Tuesday. Have a nice day."

[Ree]

Oh Dave...you ruined yet another vacation, Dave, for an overreacting customer who is prone to histrionics, Dave.
You shouldn't do that, Dave.
Dave, don't you feel any remorse?
Dave, you made your customer cry, Dave.
Shame on you Dave.

[Fox One]

It's so sad. They really, really believe the phone call the next morning will go as such:

Business Owner: He did what?! My God...please...have a years' stay on us...and my car, too!! And his job? Puh-lease! He's beyond fired. In fact, I've got him tied to the tool shed right now, why don't you and your family head on over and pelt him with rocks and other small objects?

I wish I could smell the smoke pouring from their ears.

[bainsidhe]

I see. So the sister wanted you to trot on down and apologize in person. Right after you were sworn at and told that hubby would kick your ass. Yeah. At that point I would have calmly pointed out that you did indeed apologize and were then sworn at and threatened with bodily harm. And that you'd then be ending the call now and further contact must be made through coworkers/managers otherwise you will file a formal harrassment complaint with authorities.

I'd then end it with "Please inform your sister that we appreciate her business. Have a lovely day".

[Snowbird]

Sister: you know what, I am through with you.....just go home tonight and think about what you've done and how you can give customer service in the future...ok?

Um.. seriously, I couldn't stop laughing after I read this part.

Bad Dave!! BAD!! Did you swat yourself with a rolled up newspaper and sit in the corner for an hour afterward too?

[jerkface11]

How can you sleep at night?

[Barracuda]

Do they all use your name like that? I swear, they're all channeling HAL 2000. Next time they start going "Dave" this and "Dave" that, put on the theme music from Space Odyssey 2001 and THEN hang up.

[Mr Hero]

How can you sleep at night?

On top of a big pile of money next to many beutiful women

[smileyeagle1021]

Oh Dave...you ruined yet another vacation, Dave, for an overreacting customer who is prone to histrionics, Dave.
You shouldn't do that, Dave.
Dave, don't you feel any remorse?
Dave, you made your customer cry, Dave.
Shame on you Dave.

darn you Ree... I just had a Rule #1 violation... at work no less... not cool

How can you sleep at night?

"normally, in my underwear, on my left hand side, with two pillows, and a cat sleeping next to me, dreaming of one day maybe sharing a bed with this guy I know ... ma'am.... ma'am"

[South Texan]

On top of a big pile of money next to many beutiful women

and you SLEEP????