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  • #1

    I'm baaaaaaaaack!

    Phone Sex

    Last week:
    Me: Thank you for calling Bugaboo phones, my name is TPG, can I have your cell number please?
    SC: 555-500-1212.
    Me: Thank you. One moment while I pull up your order please.

    I can hear the guy giggling and carrying on with someone. And then I hear a girl with a strong Asian accent in the background, and she is giggling and making noises and I hear her say repeatedly:

    Girl: I am pulling it out. I am pulling it out! *giggle giggle* Yes, I am pulling, I am pulling it out!

    Me:

    More giggling and carrying on

    Me: Hello sir? Sir? Are you there? Sir? Hello?......


    ......all right, I am disconnecting this call for lack of response.


    I mention it to my supervisor, JP. He decides he has to hear the call. Then he IMs me shocked: Oh my God i can't believe how blatant that was! He then informs he he had to listen to it to 'make sure my people are handling unusual situations with professionalism'. Riiiight, JP.

    Later I go to break and run into Alberto, the QA. I tell Alberto about my entertaining call. And he decides he has to go listen to it right that minute and takes off. I yell after him 'I work with a bunch of dirty old men!'

    The entire breakroom erupts into laughter.






    What a Waste of Oxygen

    SC: WHAT is taking so long! I've already given all this information and now you're asking about it again! WHY?!!!! Why are you doing this! This is RIDICULOUS!!!
    Me: Ma'am I have an order here for---
    SC: DON'T GIVE ME YOUR STUPID SPEECHES JUST ANSWER MY GODDAMN QUESTION!!!!*snarl*
    Me:
    SC: To someone in the background God this one's not very bright. I think she's on drugs or something. *Wah wah wah bitch bitch bitch some more...*
    Me: Your order needs to be run through a security verification, ma'am.
    SC: No, it doesn't! I want it put through now! Are you on drugs or something?!!!
    Me:
    SC: HELLOOOOOO!!!! Are you going to answer me?!
    Me: I really have no response to that, Ma'am.
    SC: Well obviously!!!
    Me: *sigh* Do you want to complete the order or not, Ma'am?
    SC: I want to speak to your supervisor since you obviously don't know how to do what you're told!

    So off she goes to the lead, Erin. I tell Erin she accused me of being on drugs. I had to take a break after 10 minutes of talking to this bitch woman. I come back and Erin is off the line with her. As I walk by Erin looks me in the eye and says "So, did you go do some drugs?"

    I nearly fell over....




    Mr. Anger Management

    Me: Thank you for calling UTalk2Much phone cards, may I have the pin# for your calling card please?
    SC: Why do you need that?!!!
    Me: To pull up your order sir...
    SC: Well I punched it in, it should be there in front of you!
    Me: Sir, I need you to verify at least the last 4 digits so I can make sure we pulled up the correct account.
    SC: Fine! It's 1234-4568-91.
    Me: Thank you. And what is your name, sir?
    SC: why do you need my name?!!! It should be there in front of you!!! Why don't you tell me my name!!!
    Me: I need to verify your name sir, before I can go any further.
    SC: You listen here, I've had just about enough of this. What the fuck is the problem?!!!
    Me: Do not cuss at me or I will disconnect this call, sir.
    SC: Well what is your problem?!!!
    Me: Your order was sent to us for a security verification.
    SC: I DON'T CARE! I WANT MY MINUTES! I WANT YOUR SUPERVISOR RIGHT NOW!!!
    Gladly.

    Off he goes to JP. JP speaks to him for about 30 seconds and then hangs up on him for cussing again. JP sends me an IM.
    JP: I'm showing he's been previously verified but it was 2 years ago. Were you able to get that far?
    Me: No. I needed to confirm the address was still the same and we didn't get that far.
    JP: Ok, I'll take care of it.

    So JP has the lead call the bank to verify name and address and see if its still the same as when we did security procedures 2 years ago.

    Meanwhile, I continue to take calls. Approximately 17 minutes later, guess who comes through my extension again?

    SC: Oh you! I want that goddamn supervisor of yours!

    So I IM JP again: HE'S BAAAAAACK!
    JP: Hang on, we're almost done verifying the address. Put him on hold.
    Me: Ok.

    A minute later, JP asks me to send him through. I can hear JP behind me talking to him. The guy is obviously still being a class A jerk.

    JP then says "Well sir, if you had just let the first girl verify your pin card#, your name, and your address, she could have put your order through in about 60 seconds. But because you insisted on escalating this call and using foul language, it's taken up 20 minutes, not only of your time, but of 3 people in this department. If you were seeking attention, you have got it, but I would advise you to find other outlets to satisfy your need for attention."

    JP said he didn't like hearing that. Not one bit.
    Because as we all know, on the Internet all men are men, all women are men and all children are FBI agents.
    Tags: None
  • #2
    Quoth ThePhoneGoddess View Post
    JP then says "Well sir, if you had just let the first girl verify your pin card#, your name, and your address, she could have put your order through in about 60 seconds. But because you insisted on escalating this call and using foul language, it's taken up 20 minutes, not only of your time, but of 3 people in this department. If you were seeking attention, you have got it, but I would advise you to find other outlets to satisfy your need for attention."

    JP said he didn't like hearing that. Not one bit.
    Please tell JP he has a fan girl That was brilliant!
    You've earned muchos cookies for dealing with him too
    The report button - not just for decoration

    Comment

    • #3
      Quoth ThePhoneGoddess View Post
      I yell after him 'I work with a bunch of dirty old men!'

      The entire breakroom erupts into laughter.





      You say that like it's a bad thing.
      Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

      "I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily

      Comment

      • #4
        Quoth ThePhoneGoddess View Post
        I yell after him 'I work with a bunch of dirty old men!'
        To paraphrase Redd Foxx (as Fred Sanford), "Yeah, and we'll be dirty old men, until we're dead old men"
        Aerodynamics are for people who can't build engines. --Enzo Ferrari

        Comment

        • #5
          We're gonna need a copy of that first call so we can give our opinions of it.

          Comment

          • #6
            Quoth jerkface11 View Post
            We're gonna need a copy of that first call so we can give our opinions of it.
            When I was reading this I was hearing Bill Lumbergh's voice.
            "If we refund your money, give you a free replacement and shoot the manager, then will you be happy?" - sign seen in a restaurant

            Comment

            • #7
              Quoth ThePhoneGoddess View Post
              JP said he didn't like hearing that. Not one bit.
              Nice. I like your sup.

              ^-.-^
              Faith is about what you do. It's about aspiring to be better and nobler and kinder than you are. It's about making sacrifices for the good of others. - Dresden

              Comment

              • #8
                ...Now I can hear him sucking in his breath over clenched teeth ("*ssss*yeahhhhhhh...")

                Make it stop...

                MAKE IT STOP!

                and someone bring me my stapler
                "For a musician, the SNES sound engine is like using Crayola Crayons. Nobuo Uematsu used Crayola Crayons to paint the Sistine Chapel." - Jeremy Jahns (re: "Dancing Mad")
                "The difference between an amateur and a master is that the master has failed way more times." - JoCat
                "Thinking is difficult, therefore let the herd pronounce judgment!" ~ Carl Jung
                "There's burning bridges, and then there's the lake just to fill it with gasoline." - Wiccy, reddit
                "Retail is a cruel master, and could very well be the most educational time of many people's lives, in its own twisted way." - me
                "Love keeps her in the air when she oughta fall down...tell you she's hurtin' 'fore she keens...makes her a home." - Capt. Malcolm Reynolds, "Serenity" (2005)
                Acts of Gord – Read it, Learn it, Love it!
                "Our psychic powers only work if the customer has a mind to read." - me

                Comment

                • #9
                  Ugh, I feel your pain.

                  I work in a mortgage servicing call center and we need to verify the loan number, name, last 4 of the SS, phone number and both the property and mailing address for security of the account. Most customers are fine with it and speed right through the process, but you always have a few that have to complain and demand why we need that information or that they don't give that information out. It then turns into a big production and takes endless time to just wring it out of them. If they would just give the information quickly they could get their answers and be done.

                  Comment

                  • #10
                    I do the Lumberg voice at work when I need someone to do something they hate doing.

                    Comment

                    • #11
                      JP is clearly a most awesome sup.
                      A lion however, will only devour your corpse, whereas an SC is not sated until they have destroyed your soul. (Quote per infinitemonkies)

                      Comment

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