Well, THAT was uncalled for

[Hyena Dandy]

I had a good response once when some nutjob came in when I worked at the video store.

"Are you gay?"
"If you're interested, my shift ends at five"

[d962831]

Next time someone asks if you are, rip into them that it's none of thheir damn business and they're a complete jackass for asking. Seriously, what business is it of someone's anyway? If he thought it, he should have kept it as a thought.

That's what I do. If I think someone might be gay, lesbian, or bi, I keep it as a thought. Asking is rude to begin with, and I can't even imagine how much of a jerk I'd look like for asking in the first place.

[MoxisPilot]

The most appropriate, tactful, and business-like responses I can think of:

"That's a rather personal question."
"I'd prefer not discuss my personal life."

The reasoning behind these responses is this:

- If you rip into the customer for asking you a personal question, you could find yourself in trouble with the mngmt. for abusing customers when a simple, tactful response would have sufficed.

- If you respond politely but firmly with one of the above responses, and you still find yourself in trouble with your employer, you are entirely within your rights to dispute any punishments.

You are obligated to be polite; you are not obligated to share personal information, and probably shouldn't. (Mind you, I'm not saying not to be proud of yourself - but I wouldn't tell a complete stranger what type of car I drive, much less my sexual preference.)

[CaptainThrifty]

J: I thought so. I know some gay people. They're horrible. All gay people should be wiped from the face of the earth.

"Why would you want happy people to be wiped from the face of the earth?"

Just for the confusion factor and the WTF look on their face, it's great to remind people of the original definition of the word. It's then up to you whether or not to reveal that you fit both definitions of the word. It also helps if you tend to use bigger and more archaic word in your daily convos.

[BookstoreEscapee]

Also, some people that ask that (especially with regard to my job) want to know about gay clubs/bars in the area, and are only comfortable with asking another gay person for some reason or another.

That makes sense...in that case, a smile and a polite, "Why do you ask?" should be enough. It gives them an opening if they just want to know about the local "scene"; if their motives are more nefarious, it might deter them. If they push it, a firm "my personal life is none of your business" is perfectly reasonable.