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Background: I work at a gas station, I do the lottery. For those of you who have no idea how lottery works, here's a little overview, the Daily Number is like a Big Three, you can have 50 cent, 1.00 tickets etc, for a day or night drawing, straight or box or both, TONS OF OPTIONS.
People will throw numbers and options out at you a mile a minute or they'll write every number down on some scrap of paper and tell you that they want this column this way, this column this way, and the last three another. Then when you make a mistake they berate you.
The Bane of my Existence
Lottery and the people involved. My manager has informed me that if anyone comes up and their request is ridiculous, I am allowed to force them to fill out a card. My AWESOME manager has stated to customers who have complained, "She's the lottery girl, it's HER CALL." I'm so spoiled.
Today:
SC: *hands me the infamous scrap of paper with five numbers on it and proceeds to say,* I want all these numbers two tickets each for a dollar on the Day drawing, YOU GOT THAT?!
Me: *glances at the paper* Can you fill out a card please?
SC: *rips the paper out of my hands* I can't get some FREAKING NUMBERS?!
Me: You can fill out a card.
SC: I'LL GET THEM SOMEWHERE ELSE!!!!
At this point he stomps two feet to our roving manager who is there to replace my manager while he's on vacation. RM is actually about MY AGE and completely understands the finer points about lottery.
SC: I CAN'T GET SOME NUMBERS HERE?!
RM: Um... *looks toward me*
Me: AM told me to tell them to get a card.
RM: *shrugs* You can fill out a card.
SC: Oh my GAWD. *stomps out*
Seriously...I didn't kill your first born, I asked you to fill out a card that takes less than TWO MINUTES. It's not going to kill you.
I'm Sorry...?
No really, I'm not. When you tell me that you will be taking your business elsewhere because I can't do your lottery because the lottery machine has been smoking crack again (damnit, Lottery, you fucking druggie!) I don't really give a damn and I wish you the best of luck. I mean, it might be the fact that it's the lottery system and you won't be able to get lottery anywhere...or maybe it just might be the fact that our store chain does lottery as a COURTESY. We actually don't make ANY money off of it. So when you tell me that I'm losing your powerball money (oooooh a DOLLAR) I'm really not, so I don't give a crap. To hell with customer service to you. Apparently the lottery machine being unable to print tickets is MY FAULT.
Yes...it is, I'm supergirl, I took off my glasses outside and stared up at the lottery satellite and exploded it.
You Sexist Pigs
I have been unable to think of witty comebacks to things so I just say what comes to mind first, which may or may not have been rude, but at the time I took offense to these statements--which usually come from the mouths of otherwise nice elderly gents.
Me: *changing the garbage outside which can at times be a cumbersome job but nothing I can't handle*
SC: That's a MAN'S job, don't you think?
Me:
(Like I can't DO it?) Actually there's no men working in the store right now, so I'd say it was MY job.
The second one was today.
Me: Yes, it's just my sister and I.
SC: Not too much for your parents to look after, only one problem.
Me: What is that?
SC: You're GIRLS.
Me: ...We were a lot of trouble, that's for sure.
Oh Now Don't get the MEDIA Involved
We don't keep 20s in the drawer. You're lucky if you get one. We usually can't change a 100.
SC: Strange Indian lady.
Me: Here's your change from 100, *hands her eight tens*
SC: Where are my twenties?
Me: I don't have any twenties, I only have tens.
SC: Why?
Me: Because we just don't keep twenties in the drawers.
SC: Why?
Me: Because we might get robbed.
SC: You might get ROBBED? I don't get my twenties because you MIGHT get robbed? Why would you get robbed, who robs gas stations?!
Me: (WTF?! Everytime you fucking BLINK a gas station in America is held up at gunpoint, don't lecture me on getting robbed!) Yes, people hold up gas stations, we just don't keep twenties in the drawer.
SC: Well, I want twenties, give me twenties.
Me: I don't HAVE twenties.
SC: Well I'm going to alert the MEDIA because I couldn't get what I wanted here!
Me: ....
HANG UP AND TALK TO MEEEEEEEEE!!!!
Dear Customer,
I am staring at you behind the counter and ignoring everything you say, why might this be? Well, I'll give you a hint, it's fastened to your EAR. I will not conduct any business with you until you hang up your phone and talk to me directly. I don't want to mistake you talking to me while you're telling your wife that yes you do want that after I've asked if you want a bag. If you tell me no you didn't want a bag after that, you're SOL because I've given you one, and I refuse to take it back.
If you are not on the phone and I am staring at you with a bright smile on my face without helping you, it is probably because you are holding out some odd amount of money and expecting me to read your mind that you want a pack of Camel Non-Filters and then the rest on pump 17. I refuse to touch your money until you tell me what you want me to do with it.
I'm not stupid, you need to SPEAK UP
I just had a customer that mumble everything and then assumed I was stupid and began speaking that way (no louder, unfortunately, just more condescending) because I had to ask him "what?" several times and misunderstood what he wanted.
Well pardon me, sir, if you tell me you want "The big four" I'm going to ask what numbers you want to play. He wanted the REPORTS, because I could TOTALLY tell that's what he wanted, I was just playing around, pretending I couldn't read his mind for FUN.
I Just said it to be a Smart Ass
Some guy came in wanting those stupid icecream cups with the little wooden spoon-like things in them. We don't carry them.
Me: We don't carry those, but you could try Wal-Mart.
SC: If Wal-Mart had them do you think I'd even BEEEEEE HERE?!
Yes, actually, I do think that, I think you'd come all the way here and waste our time, but that's because I knew that you'd gone to wal mart, I was just being coy, I have these FANTASTIC mind-reading powers like every customer believes, I knew exactly where you went before you stupidly walked into our small convenience store...I just said that to be a Smart Ass, you know? To pretend I couldn't read your tiny brain.
People will throw numbers and options out at you a mile a minute or they'll write every number down on some scrap of paper and tell you that they want this column this way, this column this way, and the last three another. Then when you make a mistake they berate you.
The Bane of my Existence
Lottery and the people involved. My manager has informed me that if anyone comes up and their request is ridiculous, I am allowed to force them to fill out a card. My AWESOME manager has stated to customers who have complained, "She's the lottery girl, it's HER CALL." I'm so spoiled.
Today:
SC: *hands me the infamous scrap of paper with five numbers on it and proceeds to say,* I want all these numbers two tickets each for a dollar on the Day drawing, YOU GOT THAT?!
Me: *glances at the paper* Can you fill out a card please?
SC: *rips the paper out of my hands* I can't get some FREAKING NUMBERS?!
Me: You can fill out a card.
SC: I'LL GET THEM SOMEWHERE ELSE!!!!
At this point he stomps two feet to our roving manager who is there to replace my manager while he's on vacation. RM is actually about MY AGE and completely understands the finer points about lottery.
SC: I CAN'T GET SOME NUMBERS HERE?!
RM: Um... *looks toward me*
Me: AM told me to tell them to get a card.
RM: *shrugs* You can fill out a card.
SC: Oh my GAWD. *stomps out*
Seriously...I didn't kill your first born, I asked you to fill out a card that takes less than TWO MINUTES. It's not going to kill you.
I'm Sorry...?
No really, I'm not. When you tell me that you will be taking your business elsewhere because I can't do your lottery because the lottery machine has been smoking crack again (damnit, Lottery, you fucking druggie!) I don't really give a damn and I wish you the best of luck. I mean, it might be the fact that it's the lottery system and you won't be able to get lottery anywhere...or maybe it just might be the fact that our store chain does lottery as a COURTESY. We actually don't make ANY money off of it. So when you tell me that I'm losing your powerball money (oooooh a DOLLAR) I'm really not, so I don't give a crap. To hell with customer service to you. Apparently the lottery machine being unable to print tickets is MY FAULT.
Yes...it is, I'm supergirl, I took off my glasses outside and stared up at the lottery satellite and exploded it.
You Sexist Pigs
I have been unable to think of witty comebacks to things so I just say what comes to mind first, which may or may not have been rude, but at the time I took offense to these statements--which usually come from the mouths of otherwise nice elderly gents.
Me: *changing the garbage outside which can at times be a cumbersome job but nothing I can't handle*
SC: That's a MAN'S job, don't you think?
Me:
(Like I can't DO it?) Actually there's no men working in the store right now, so I'd say it was MY job.The second one was today.
Me: Yes, it's just my sister and I.
SC: Not too much for your parents to look after, only one problem.
Me: What is that?
SC: You're GIRLS.
Me: ...We were a lot of trouble, that's for sure.
Oh Now Don't get the MEDIA Involved
We don't keep 20s in the drawer. You're lucky if you get one. We usually can't change a 100.
SC: Strange Indian lady.
Me: Here's your change from 100, *hands her eight tens*
SC: Where are my twenties?
Me: I don't have any twenties, I only have tens.
SC: Why?
Me: Because we just don't keep twenties in the drawers.
SC: Why?
Me: Because we might get robbed.
SC: You might get ROBBED? I don't get my twenties because you MIGHT get robbed? Why would you get robbed, who robs gas stations?!
Me: (WTF?! Everytime you fucking BLINK a gas station in America is held up at gunpoint, don't lecture me on getting robbed!) Yes, people hold up gas stations, we just don't keep twenties in the drawer.
SC: Well, I want twenties, give me twenties.
Me: I don't HAVE twenties.
SC: Well I'm going to alert the MEDIA because I couldn't get what I wanted here!
Me: ....
HANG UP AND TALK TO MEEEEEEEEE!!!!
Dear Customer,
I am staring at you behind the counter and ignoring everything you say, why might this be? Well, I'll give you a hint, it's fastened to your EAR. I will not conduct any business with you until you hang up your phone and talk to me directly. I don't want to mistake you talking to me while you're telling your wife that yes you do want that after I've asked if you want a bag. If you tell me no you didn't want a bag after that, you're SOL because I've given you one, and I refuse to take it back.
If you are not on the phone and I am staring at you with a bright smile on my face without helping you, it is probably because you are holding out some odd amount of money and expecting me to read your mind that you want a pack of Camel Non-Filters and then the rest on pump 17. I refuse to touch your money until you tell me what you want me to do with it.
I'm not stupid, you need to SPEAK UP
I just had a customer that mumble everything and then assumed I was stupid and began speaking that way (no louder, unfortunately, just more condescending) because I had to ask him "what?" several times and misunderstood what he wanted.
Well pardon me, sir, if you tell me you want "The big four" I'm going to ask what numbers you want to play. He wanted the REPORTS, because I could TOTALLY tell that's what he wanted, I was just playing around, pretending I couldn't read his mind for FUN.
I Just said it to be a Smart Ass
Some guy came in wanting those stupid icecream cups with the little wooden spoon-like things in them. We don't carry them.
Me: We don't carry those, but you could try Wal-Mart.
SC: If Wal-Mart had them do you think I'd even BEEEEEE HERE?!
Yes, actually, I do think that, I think you'd come all the way here and waste our time, but that's because I knew that you'd gone to wal mart, I was just being coy, I have these FANTASTIC mind-reading powers like every customer believes, I knew exactly where you went before you stupidly walked into our small convenience store...I just said that to be a Smart Ass, you know? To pretend I couldn't read your tiny brain.
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