No I will not call my CW in on his day off/credit card shenanigans

[flutes_and_fabric]

Credit Card Lady

Have you ever noticed that when someone's credit card is declined they always look at you as if it's you're fault? Yes, I told the computer to hate you.

CCL: Your machine is broken!
Me: It could be, but that's very unlikely. Why don't we try running it through again?
CCL: (runs it through, declined) IT'S BROKEN! I KNOW I HAVE MONEY!
Me: I'm sorry, do you have another way of paying?
CCL: STOP BEING A SMART ASS! YOU NEED TO FIX THIS!
Me: Ma'am, why don't you call the number on your card. They can assist you better than I can.
CCL: NO! IT DOESN'T LIKE MY CARD! YOUR MACHINE DOESN'T TAKE MY BANK! I CAN'T BELIEVE IT! THAT'S SO RUDE!
Me: I have the same card as you. Our machine is not broken. (I grab her items and toss them in the cart behind me. She leaves, then comes storming back in.)
CCL: YOU STOLE MY CARD! GIVE IT BACK!
Me: I'm sorry?
CCL: YOU STOLE MY CARD!
Me: Listen lady, I never even touched your cards. That's what these nifty little swipe em' yourself machines are for.
CCL: WELL THEN WHERE IS IT!
Me: I'd suggest looking in your purse. (CCL pulls her wallet out and proceeds to dump its contents on our counter. She has like, 30 cards. After passing over her card 3 times, she finally finds it, calls me a bitch, and leaves. Really, why would I even want to steal a card that had been declined. I'd be the worst thief ever.)

We're the only ones here, deal with it

I think I saw a post relating to this one somewhere. If I come across it again I'll link to it.

This middle eastern man came in to buy some foam. I said hello, but he ignored me. Not too uncommon. Things got weird though when he tried to check out. I told him he needed to have it measured, but he ignored me and just stood there. I told him again that he needed to have it measured. Finally I was like, whatever, it's a full piece, I'll check him out and put it through the system when I'm done. So I tell him his total and he gives me the nastiest look I have ever seen. The kinda look like I'm scum that doesn't deserve to breath the same air as him look. He then barks at me:
SC: Get me a man
Me: We don't have any men working here at the moment
SC: Then call one (he wrinkles his nose at me and frowns as if this short exchange is slowly killing him on the inside. Dude, this is a craft store, we have one guy that works here. This is a pretty estrogen dominated field. I guess it has to do with his religion, but you can't expect the whole world to bend to your beliefs. I hated going to my grandparents temple cause the women were forced to sit upstairs. I know how strict religion can be, I really do. But discriminating based on sex is kinda a big no no around these parts.)
SC: YOU WILL GET ME A MAN!
Me: Well, my male CW is in New Jersey. If you'd like to wait four hours to check out I could give him a call. Otherwise just give me the xxx.xx and get out.
SC: You should learn your place (ok, practicing your beliefs are fine, forcing them on me is not.)
Me: Well at the moment my place is behind this register, and I'm really, really trying to help. When I'm done here at work my place will be anywhere I damn well please. (Defeated, he finally pays and leaves. It was a really frustrating experience. I've had people hate me cause I'm jewish, I've had people hate me cause I'm gay, I've had people hate me cause I choose to put pink highlights in my hair and wear a spiked bracelet next to my trendy pandora bracelet, I've had guys treat me like a stupid girl or call me little darlin' or something-they quickly learn to put their balls away- but I've never had anyone treat me so poorly simply because I have a vagina and not a penis. I try to be open minded about other beliefs and values different from my own, but I was really having a hard time with this one.)

[infinitemonkies]

SC: YOU WILL GET ME A MAN!

I would have slowly looked him up and down, then said "Well, my cousin Dave is into cute older guys, and he's single, lemme give you his number"

[MannersMakethMan]

CCL: NO! IT DOESN'T LIKE MY CARD! YOUR MACHINE DOESN'T TAKE MY BANK! I CAN'T BELIEVE IT! THAT'S SO RUDE!

Yes indeed madam, the staff have been training the machines to be rude specifically to you. I'm so glad the test worked!

[HorrorFrogPrincess]

"Actually, ma'am, this machine is linked to a government database and is programed to decline cards belonging to active pedophiles. The police will be here in 2 minutes."

[Pairou]

I would have slowly looked him up and down, then said "Well, my cousin Dave is into cute older guys, and he's single, lemme give you his number"

I would pay money to see this. : p

[Calud]

[B]cause I choose to put pink highlights in my hair and wear a spiked bracelet next to my trendy pandora bracelet

Screehshot or it didn't happen!

Luckily it's still just the aholes that are like that, not the entire community of that religion.

[smileyeagle1021]

I would have slowly looked him up and down, then said "Well, my cousin Dave is into cute older guys, and he's single, lemme give you his number"

I am so wishing I would have the opportunity to use that line
as it is that I like being a man though, I'll have to settle for an opportunity to hear someone use it

[flutes_and_fabric]

I would have slowly looked him up and down, then said "Well, my cousin Dave is into cute older guys, and he's single, lemme give you his number"

That's a good one. Too bad my brain doesn't work that fast

[Digitalpotato]

I would pay money to see this. : p

Especially if this dude was a fundie. XD

[CrazedClerkthe2nd]

Too bad you couldn't go into the backroom, try to diguise yourself as a guy (baggy clothes, mustache, sunglasses) then come back out and see if he notices?

[dbblsanta]

I don't get it though...if women are supposed to be inferior to men, wouldn't it be your place to serve him? Oh but oops, there I go again, expecting sucky customers to make sense. Silly me.

[Shironu-Akaineko]

Okay, I'm starting to think that lately, this one middle-eastern guy is traveling the country looking to piss off female workers.

[jjllbb]

She leaves, then comes storming back in.)
CCL: YOU STOLE MY CARD! GIVE IT BACK!

UGH. This happens ALL THE TIME. I didn't give you your card, I didn't give you your change, I didn't give you your receipt. You are just a huge DUMB a** that loses everything. The End.

Makes me so angry. Even the ones who don't blatantly say that you stole their card are implying it. Once they say you didn't get them their card and you pretend to look all around the register for it as if they could possibly be right, if you don't find it right away they give you this look like they're trying to x-ray your pockets.

le sigh.

[Salesmonkey]

I think he was a terrorist! Foam insulation can be used as baffling and igniting material in improvised bombs. You should call Homeland Security immediately and report this suspicious behaviour.

[Ill_Used_Heroine]

UGH. This happens ALL THE TIME. I didn't give you your card, I didn't give you your change, I didn't give you your receipt. You are just a huge DUMB a** that loses everything. The End.

Makes me so angry. Even the ones who don't blatantly say that you stole their card are implying it. Once they say you didn't get them their card and you pretend to look all around the register for it as if they could possibly be right, if you don't find it right away they give you this look like they're trying to x-ray your pockets.

le sigh.

I've gotten to the point where I actually say, "here's your card back," as I hand it to them, and they STILL go "where's my card?!" Good thing I can say pretty much anything, so I just go "uh, remember when I said 'here's your card back' as I handed it to you and you put it back in your wallet?" Though, of course, they have to dig out the wallet and go through it to find the damn card before they glare at me and stalk away.