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  • #1

    Pigs, Products, and Too Much Information

    Edit to Add: Yay, 400th post!

    Yay, I have more stories to contribute! I should probably contribute more often as I tend to forget things in between weeks.

    I'm working Black Friday, my first year ever.....somebody send me good vibes, please?

    Products

    "Hi, my name is Blabbity Blah. Can you-can you tell the people at the um, store that I live at 40 Blibbetty Blib Road and I'm doing a garage sale? I'm um, open from 6:30, all day so can you? My name is Blabbity Blah, tell them that. I have a lot of product to sell away. Byes!"

    Since when did I become an advertising service?

    WAY TMI Buddy!

    Two jerks come up, semi regulars, and they might've already had a beer already because they're starting to get a bit...jokey. I forget what Numbnuts 1 said, but Numbnuts 2 responded with, "Yeah, but I'm better in bed!"

    Me: " Um, whoa."

    Numbnuts 2: "Yeah, see, she couldn't think of anything to say to that!"

    Discounts For Everyone!

    We've been having doors breaking down randomly all day and then the front door decided to stop working, trapping 15 people inside the store to mill around and laugh about the stuck door. Couple guys tried forcing it open but no luck. I tried forcing it open and turning it off, no luck. So I call the manager for backup.

    Meanwhile, Loudmouth at my register is screaming for discounts for everyone, 90% off everything they buy because the manager was taking a minute to get to the door. Finally, Not So Awesome Manager shows up and screws with the door and gets it open. Loudmouth still has the gall to beg for 90% off just because of the store door.

    Old Bastard/ Pig

    (On a side note, after reading Retail Hell Underground, I don't think I can ever work at a clothing store. =/)

    There's this guy in photo who's snarfing on a giant bag of tostitos and pink lemonade snapple and he's chewing with loud crunches, mouth open, dropping as many crumbs on the floor as chips into his snout mouth. He comes up to me to pay for his pictures, waddles off, comes back and pays for the rest, now chewing on gum with loud, obnoxious smacking. When he left, guess who had to sweep up his mess? You get three guesses and the first two don't count.

    To add insult to injury, he had the gall to throw his empty, GLASS bottle down into the photo drawer to let it splash all over the photo paper. At least the glass didn't break.

    "I'm The Customer, How The Hell Would I Know that's Tomorrow?"

    Oh boy, New Kid Who Doesn't Answer Phones had his first "I'm The CUSTOMER!!!!! ELEVENTY!!!!~111!" types today. Aid of Rite is running a 3 day special on Christmas items and candy throughout the store and we have giant signs with "NO RAINCHECKS ALLOWED ON 3 DAY SALE ITEMS" in front of all the things on sale.

    This customer comes up and starts bitching because her truffles are $3.99 instead of $1.99.

    "WELL YOU HAVE THE SIGN UP!"

    "That's a sign saying there's no rainchecks on the sale items."

    "HOW THE HELL WOULD I KNOW WHEN THE SALE IS?!?"

    "I can give you a flyer, it clearly states the sale is tomorrow."

    "YOUR SIGN DON'T SAY THAT!"

    "But it's not the sale yet."

    "I AM A PAYING CUSTOMER AND I WANT TO KNOW HOW THE HELL WOULD I KNOW IF YOU DIDN'T GIVE ME THAT FLYER?!?!?"

    (There's a rack of them up front and in the lobby.)

    Not So Awesome Manager is called over and he caves in and gives it to her.

    *le sigh* I miss Awesome Manager. =/
    Success is not final, failure is not fatal: It is the courage to continue that counts.-Winston Churchill
    Tags: None
  • #2
    Re garage saler:

    Write down all the info, acting like you're going to make the announcement as soon as you hang up from the call, then.....oh.....a week or two later, make the announcement to your customers!

    Re the 3 day sale:

    That's one of those things that even if the signs clearly state the sale days/dates, you're damned if you do, damned if you don't. If the signs are up a day or two early as a heads up, so they can plan their shopping accordingly, they'll bitch that they can't get the sale prices on the current day. If the signs aren't put up until the day the sale starts, they bitch that they were "just here yesterday", and bought that expensive item that is now deeply discounted, and "why didn't you tell me this was going on sale? I would have waited another day! I want the difference refunded!" (Even if the signs clearly state the sale prices don't apply to previously purchased items).

    Mike
    Meow.........

    Comment

    • #3
      Regarding sales signs a local grocery store that I get my fried chicken from when I am in the mood started this thing a couple of years back that an 8 piece meal was cheaper on Monday. You could tell a lot of people had demanded they sell them the chicken at sale price because when I walked in late on a Tuesday and asked for the 8 piece they visibly flinched.

      Comment

      • #4
        I wish the stores here did that -- I still like "gas station fried chicken" better, tho. Cheap as hell, (sometimes) fresher AND almost always better than the big chain's chikin!

        Then again, a number of small restaurants here close completely on Mondays for the same reason your groceries run that special -- slack business. That, and everybody knows you eat red beans & rice (along with leftovers from Sunday Dinner) on Mondays...

        The one day nobody needs to run a sale is Friday, because they know they'll all be packed with people wanting seafood (it gets insane during Lent here, but Friday is Fish day, year-round)
        Last edited by EricKei; 11-27-2009, 02:21 PM.
        "For a musician, the SNES sound engine is like using Crayola Crayons. Nobuo Uematsu used Crayola Crayons to paint the Sistine Chapel." - Jeremy Jahns (re: "Dancing Mad")
        "The difference between an amateur and a master is that the master has failed way more times." - JoCat
        "Thinking is difficult, therefore let the herd pronounce judgment!" ~ Carl Jung
        "There's burning bridges, and then there's the lake just to fill it with gasoline." - Wiccy, reddit
        "Retail is a cruel master, and could very well be the most educational time of many people's lives, in its own twisted way." - me
        "Love keeps her in the air when she oughta fall down...tell you she's hurtin' 'fore she keens...makes her a home." - Capt. Malcolm Reynolds, "Serenity" (2005)
        Acts of Gord – Read it, Learn it, Love it!
        "Our psychic powers only work if the customer has a mind to read." - me

        Comment

        • #5
          mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm... red beans and rice! We had that yesterday with our fried turkey and cornbread and pralines.
          "No, I will not poop a shopping cart out for you." - Irving Patrick Freleigh

          Comment

          • #6
            Quoth ralerin View Post
            WAY TMI Buddy!

            Two jerks come up, semi regulars, and they might've already had a beer already because they're starting to get a bit...jokey. I forget what Numbnuts 1 said, but Numbnuts 2 responded with, "Yeah, but I'm better in bed!"

            Me: " Um, whoa."

            Numbnuts 2: "Yeah, see, she couldn't think of anything to say to that!"
            My internal response would have been to look at Numbnuts #1 and ask "Really? Is he?"

            Great way of turning a bad joke back onto them...

            "Kamala the Ugandan Giant" 1950-2020 • "Bullet" Bob Armstrong 1939-2020 • "Road Warrior Animal" 1960-2020 • "Zeus" Tiny Lister Jr. 1958-2020 • "Hacksaw" Butch Reed 1954-2021 • "New Jack" Jerome Young 1963-2021 • "Mr. Wonderful" Paul Orndorff 1949-2021 • "Beautiful" Bobby Eaton 1958-2021 • Daffney 1975-2021

            Comment

            • #7
              Quoth EricKei View Post
              I wish the stores here did that -- I still like "gas station fried chicken" better, tho. Cheap as hell, (sometimes) fresher AND almost always better than the big chain's chikin!
              Meh I am a bachelor only home cooked meals I get are the ones I make. Only thing about my ex wife I miss is her cooking.

              I love chicken any way you make it i love it.

              Comment

              • #8
                Quoth jackfaire View Post
                Meh I am a bachelor only home cooked meals I get are the ones I make. Only thing about my ex wife I miss is her cooking.
                BTDT

                All I can say is thank gawd for the BBQ!

                And break out the shovel so I can get to it for the next few months.

                B
                "Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former."- Albert Einstein.
                I never knew how happy paint could make people until I started selling it.

                Comment

                • #9
                  Quoth ralerin View Post
                  Not So Awesome Manager is called over and he caves in and gives it to her.
                  Managers like this need to be taken out back, tied up with duct tape to the nearest electric barbed wire fence, and beaten violently and enthusiastically by a steroid-pumping, PCP-snorting, crowbar-wielding, no-necked, wild-eyed, drunken sailor biker bouncer prison-breaking asshole who's had a bad day.

                  "The Customer Is Always Right...But The Bartender Decides Who Is                   Still A Customer."

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