You're a clever asshole, aren't you?

[Gruesome]

I used to work at a pizza joint that sold pizzas by the pair. Pizza pizza and all that. You couldn't get just one pie - they came two by two like they were marching into an ark. That was the deal and it wasn't real freakin' hard to understand. I reiterate - PIZZZA PIZZA!

So I get this ya-hoo on the phone who makes a particular point of ordering "TWO PIZZAS." Well sure, I said, our pizzas come in pairs so I'll be more than happy to make you TWO PIZZAS. You buy one, the other is free! Yay, everybody loves free, right?

Naturally he comes in and spouts of with a massively superior tone, "Where are my other pizzas? I distinctly ordered TWO PIZZAS, and we DISCUSSED this, and since you sell two for one then I should actually be receiving FOUR PIZZAS."

You know what, asshole? I might have just failed my second semester of college calculus (I had, actually) but I did just fine in first grade math! I ran into at least two of these idiots in my four years at that place, but the other one was all apologetic and laughing at the misunderstanding. This guy was specifically trying to maufacture this fuster cluck and I hope he choked on his pizza. Thankfully I was the highest ranking crew member in the store (that particular store manager liked to do anything other than show up to work) so I wasn't about to offer him any freebies. I took his money first, then made his other pies and ignored his ass until they popped out. I leavened my "Thank you, come again!" with a heaping side order of GTFO.

[Mnemjian]

Gee I wonder where you worked?

Yeah, so if you order two things then you get two things? How terrible!!! I'm reminded of that PBF letter where the guy didn't want his BOGO free cheesy bread and got all in a snit because they had to give it to him. Will SC's ever be satisfied??

[Becks]

Will SC's ever be satisfied??

No. No, they will not.

[Plaidman]

Hmm. Yeah. He sounded like a dick. Maybe though, he just thought the pizzas just came into pairs automatically. I was a kid when I went to little ceasers, but I knew they always came in pairs. I just thought it was their gimmick, so had I wanted four pizzas, I would have asked for two. Because since your One pizza= Two real pizzas, then ordering 2 would equal 4.