"I'm not stupid, the pump is broken!"

[BrenDAnn]

On our pumps at the c-store, you have to lift the black lever that the nozzle sits on, then choose either the pay outside or pay inside button. It amuses me greatly to watch people just lift the lever, put the nozzle in their car, and stare at the pump waiting for it to turn on. Press the button, genius! My absolute FAVORITE though is when someone (bonus points if it's a "manly man") comes in fretting because their card won't work, and I (lil tiny gal of 5 feet tall) goes out, pops the card in the reader and back out, and magically, it works. 9 times out of 10, they were putting their card in backwards. 9 times out of 10, they look at me like I'm a magician, but they do have the courtesy to thank me. I've said it before: If you don't know how to operate the pumps, either ask me, or just plain don't attempt it!

[BookstoreEscapee]

here in New Jersey, where you are not allowed to pump your own gas, a lot of people never bothered to learn and go deer-in-the-headlights when faced with self-serve. I actually don't like someone else pumping my gas for me, but it's the law here so I put up with it.

I've lived in NJ almost all my life. I went to college in Pennsylvania, but I didn't have a car there, and when I was 25 I lived in PA for a year, just over the NJ border, and the closest and cheapest gas station to my apartment happened to be a full-serve station, so I never had to pump my own gas (I'm quite happy with that arrangement, to be honest...especially in the winter when I get to stay in my warm car). I had a boyfriend several years ago who showed me how to do it once or twice, on a trip to Maryland, but I never actually did it myself. A couple years ago I went to Rhode Island for a wedding, by myself, and I had to stop in Connecticut for gas on the way home. Somehow I managed to pump it myself with no problem. I dunno, I guess I just know how to read the instructions. Even in NJ, the instructions are posted on the pump (along with a sticker that says "Unlawful to pump your own gas" or something like that).

[Lace Neil Singer]

Part of me thinks you got tricked into filling up her car for her.

Nope. That would indicate a higher level of intellect than I'm prepared to grant her with; also, the fact that she sulked mightily after I filled her car up would hardly indicate that.

Let me guess. She didn't even thank you for "fixing it" at that point?

How did you guess? She just gave me a nasty glare as tho I'd just kicked her puppy before storming in to pay. XD

[LadyAndreca]

I've lived in NJ almost all my life. I went to college in Pennsylvania, but I didn't have a car there, and when I was 25 I lived in PA for a year, just over the NJ border, and the closest and cheapest gas station to my apartment happened to be a full-serve station, so I never had to pump my own gas (I'm quite happy with that arrangement, to be honest...especially in the winter when I get to stay in my warm car). I had a boyfriend several years ago who showed me how to do it once or twice, on a trip to Maryland, but I never actually did it myself. A couple years ago I went to Rhode Island for a wedding, by myself, and I had to stop in Connecticut for gas on the way home. Somehow I managed to pump it myself with no problem. I dunno, I guess I just know how to read the instructions. Even in NJ, the instructions are posted on the pump (along with a sticker that says "Unlawful to pump your own gas" or something like that).

That's what made that story so hilarious for me. Two college-age men, both studying engineering, could not figure out a gas pump with posted instructions...

[mattm04]

I had to help a old lady pump gas once. She pre paid the attendant, put the nozzle in the car, pulle dhte trigger but never press the button to select what octane she wanted. That was tooooooohard she said.

She wanted me to tell the attendant that they should require all cars to take the same grade of gas, because that was too much for her to remember or look in the owners manual to find out.

[RavenStarr]

I so wished I had seen this in person. No way would I have been able to keep a straight face.

I hope someone she knows saw her and won't let her live it down. I know I wouldn't.

I wonder if she will come back and complain that pump #5 is broken.

[Lace Neil Singer]

I'm sure she'll be back. XD The petrol station prices are the cheapest in town; to SCs, economy sadly wins over pride.

[RavenStarr]

When she comes back, ask her if she needs any help with pumping gas.

[XCashier]

Let me guess. She didn't even thank you for "fixing it" at that point?

Do they ever? The best you'll get is an, "Oh."

Most of them would rather ream your ass for making them look stupid (even though they are the ones who made themselves look stupid. Go figure.).

[Magpie]

That's what made that story so hilarious for me. Two college-age men, both studying engineering, could not figure out a gas pump with posted instructions...

Engineers don't read instructions... we get much more interesting results without them. (i.e. bigger fireballs)

[NateTheChops]

I wonder, does she place a cup underneath the soda fountains and just stand there?

[BeeMused]

Engineers don't read instructions... we get much more interesting results without them. (i.e. bigger fireballs)

Yeah reading instructions or manuals is for chickens!

[Stryker One]

On a related note,

Anyone here know why some pumps are so epically slow? It's like, swipe card, wait ten seconds for it to register. Enter your pin (Debit) or zip (Credit) and press enter, wait ten seconds. Select grade, wait ten seconds. And then, if you're at a really crappy pump, the gas comes out at a trickle and it can take 10+ minutes to fill your tank. Only at Arco have I seen a system where you can load the nozzle, lock the trigger, select the grade, go pay (at separate island pay stations), and when you get back the gas is already flowing.

[dalesys]

Engineers don't read instructions... we get much more interesting results without them. (i.e. bigger fireballs)

"Experience is measured in equipment ruined."

[MadMike]

Gotta love it when someone declares that they're "not stupid", and then proves otherwise.