Smile at my baby!

[BookstoreEscapee]

I firmly believe all babies are ugly.
Yours, theirs, mine (when I have them (probably soon if my wife gets her way). They are all ugly creatures.

Nah...my boss's new kid is adorable (just born on Friday)...then again I've only seen one pic so far. He said the nurses at the hospital were all in love with him.

I'd sometimes have the opposite happen (I have gorgeous children, but I may be a little biased here. ) Some retail people would litterally try to TAKE the kid out of my arms. Uhh, don't think so. Smile at them, interact with them, or don't, it didn't matter to me. Try and take them from me, you've crossed the line.

Wow...the most I'd ever do is "shake hands" with the toddlers who got sat on my counter while their parent paid. And I only did that if they reached out first.

I like kids but I'm not going to fawn over them on command.

[Kristev]

The next time that SC shows up and demands you adore her baby, counter with, "I'm sorry, but I'm sure you don't want me spreading this nasty flu virus I've come down with to your innocent little lambie, would you?"

[Soulstealer]

......with ketchup.

What? Hey, you were all thinking it! ADMIT IT!

I was not, I hate ketchup. It's basically sugar. At least marinara sauce has more substance but what you put on the baby should accentuate the recipe you're using.

[VComps]

Hells, Wonder Woman was Wonder Woman because her comics had blatant lesbian bondage in it and still got approved by the Comics Code Authority.

Ah yes, the self-regulating CCA, who had bizarre rules such as not being able to use the word 'flick' in a comic for fear that the "L" and the "I" would run together and you'd have Spider-Man saying "Look out! He's got a fuck knife!"

[RavenStarr]

I'm thinking if she has to have people tell her the baby is adoreable. Then that must have been one butt ugly baby.

[SuperRTL]

All babies look like Winston Churchill. Everybody loved my kiddo, and he was less ugly than most, but I never could have even thought to demand somebody smile at him. If anybody did that to me, I'd have told them that babies get the kind of attention they deserve.

[RetailWorkhorse]

I was not, I hate ketchup. It's basically sugar. At least marinara sauce has more substance but what you put on the baby should accentuate the recipe you're using.

....my ketchup has no sugar......

[Sunsetsky]

I feel awkward around children so I don't fawn over them. I do believe a lot of babies are cute but it doesn't mean that I'm going to be all over them. Now if I had my own child there would be an exception...

[Andara Bledin]

Ugh, what a bitch!

I don't like babies. Never have, never will. I'll tolerate them if they're well behaved, and not in my face, but that's about it.

....my ketchup has no sugar......

Um... maybe no added sugar.... Or, wait, are you using that as a euphemism? o.O

^-.-^

[draftermatt]

Just today I was thinking to myself that I must be ready to be a father. Because I actually think kids are cute.

As far as the woman in the OP I'm reminded of something I read on the interwebs long ago that has always stuck with me

"...that think they're so special just because they have a twat, guess what ladies, we all do, you're not special"

Not the exact scenario but you get the point.

I like kids, I like babies, but as someone else said before, smile at them and some freak accuses you of being a pedophile.

That coupled with the fact that most children are scared to death of me (my nephew screamed bloody murder whenever he saw me as a baby) makes me less likely to try and interact with a kid I don't know.

[RecoveringKinkoid]

Ah yes, the self-regulating CCA, who had bizarre rules such as not being able to use the word 'flick' in a comic for fear that the "L" and the "I" would run together and you'd have Spider-Man saying "Look out! He's got a fuck knife!"

[

Peter David and the hilarious "Clint Flicker" essay.

I probably should not tell you this but remember The Funkstain? I won't tell you his name, but let's just say that his name was on his locker and one of the crew made the slightest little mark on the name label with a sharpie. Just a dot, really. That was all it took.

No, it wasn't me that did it.

[Mr.Customer]

I just remembered this one. When I worked at the store selling pretty things, weHer: No, you're still serving me.
Me: What can I do for you?
Her: You didn't smile at my baby. -launches into a lecture about child haters, and how her baby is a person, and deserves good service, like everyone else, and why am I such a snotty bitch that I can't smile at such a beautiful child-

Me: Does your baby have an American Express, Master Card, Visa, Discovery? No? then it isn't a customer, Next!

[bunnyboy]

Oh, I'd smile at the baby all right. I'd give the kid the most wicked smile I could muster. One that screams to the mother "I'm going to chop that kid of yours into little fragments with a machete if you don't get out of my line LIKE RIGHT NOW."

Sooooooo my natural toothy smile? yes I've been called an everything under the sun because my non-creepy-recoil-in-horror.... ah hell I'll put it this way my smile comes in two flavors smirk (genuinely happy/amused) and fear-inducing-rictus (forced smile, actually trying to be creepy/scary)

Wait till that kid grows up, and is the ugliest girl in school. Then Mommy Dearest is going to corner the captain of the football team and demand that he take her little precious to the prom.

eh hopefully the kid grows up like all other outcast ugly kids and yells at mommy dearest for that... or asks her to try that on who she really wants, the head cheerleader.

There is a documentary out about that, Idiocracy.

So true.

I have perfected the "wednesday addams" smile-the "I'm not perky, but I'd like to be" one ...ahh this one and its animated-yay!

See comment above about horrifying rictus, and combine with Cheshire Cat depictions for my toothy smile.

How long before someone adapts it to be used as an avatar on this forum?

Would if I wasn't lazy... oh yes I would.

......with ketchup.

What? Hey, you were all thinking it! ADMIT IT!

NO I was thinking Mari-

I was not, I hate ketchup. It's basically sugar. At least marinara sauce has more substance but what you put on the baby should accentuate the recipe you're using.

DAMMIT!

....my ketchup has no sugar......

If it's ketchup I'd get that checked...

Me: Does your baby have an American Express, Master Card, Visa, Discovery? No? then it isn't a customer, Next!

So true.

[Andara Bledin]

Just today I was thinking to myself that I must be ready to be a father. Because I actually think kids are cute.

Nah. My brother has liked babies forever. Literally. He liked babies when he was a baby.

He hasn't knowingly or willingly had any kids, himself, however, because he wants a mother in the picture somewhere, and he hasn't found one that would put up with him that wasn't also insane or about as mature as your typical 12-year-old.

^-.-^

[cdn-shorthorse]

I'm sorry ma'am, but acknowledging your child in any way would be a violation of my probation order.