Wherein I Am Physically Molested. Again.

[Akasa]

Thank you for making me laugh again GK.

[Becks]

A boxed DVD set will be available for the holiday season.

Is it available for preorder yet?

[JoitheArtist]

Oh, and Joi, where do you live that people don't all have the poem memorized already?

Texas, and then Southern California. Not really known for having snow-based cultures. Or, you know, having people who actually READ poetry.

ETA: when I was a kid, my dad insisted that I learn to memorize some poems. My first choice was "The Wreck of the Hesperus." Wonder why everyone thought I was such a morbid kid?

[Andara Bledin]

I know, I'm late. I lost conciousness. >.>

Edited to more likely reflect truth and reality, after the mental bludgeoning you take on a nightly basis.

So I got to ride all the way downtown with some strange woman pressed up against me so hard that even a drunken pervert that hits on underage girls looked at her and went “Hey, come on now, that’s not cool.”.

I'm curious as to how you let yourself be hemmed in by the cuddletart (not the same one that stole your expired pass, was it?) in the first place. Is the Skytrain crowded enough that you don't sit at the aisle to discourage company?

You’re lucky that I, like the mighty Minotaur, am currently trapped in a Labyrinth from which I cannot escape and will never see the light of day. Else I would depart my location, travel to yours and inform you face to face that you are in fact, a doodyhead.

But... but... You have minions for that!

... We may have to revoke your evil mastermind card ... although you can keep the cat.

Why do you struggle against reality? Reality is going to win every time. It’s rather stubborn that way.

The actions of a desperate man.

Like the guy with the catalog of no-longer-available hats.

I guess that sounds kind of mean, doesn’t it? I’m sorry, I don’t mean to be cruel, heartless and sadistic. My apologies. But seriously, point the phone towards you.

Ok. That's better. You can keep your card.

Indeed it is. Was wondering if anyone would catch that, eheh.

Did you really think that nobody here, of all places, would recognize such a classic?

^-.-^

[Munkie]

*raises hand meekly* actually, i've never heard of it...

[Elspeth]

*raises hand meekly* actually, i've never heard of it...

Thank you Munkie I am not the only one. Though now I am very interested.

[Aisling]

So one of your fangirls finally caught up with you?

DAMMIT! And I was so sure I'd covered my tracks!

Um...I mean....nothing to see here, move along!

[SG15Z]

Thank you Munkie I am not the only one. Though now I am very interested.

Indeed as am I. I generally avoid poems, unless they are of the "Epic" variety.

[JoitheArtist]

You can read it here: http://www.wordinfo.info/words/index...ter=C&spage=26

[SG15Z]

You can read it here: http://www.wordinfo.info/words/index...ter=C&spage=26

Wow, that was good. Morbid sure, but that's why it was so awesome! Thanks for linking that Joi!

[Megg]

That was an interesting poem, for sure! Thanks for the link. I also grew up in Texas, and moved to SoCal - I had never heard of it.

Also, I love the word "cuddletart".

[JoitheArtist]

That was an interesting poem, for sure! Thanks for the link. I also grew up in Texas, and moved to SoCal - I had never heard of it.

Also, I love the word "cuddletart".

Oooh, where in Texas? I grew up in the Amarillo area.

GK should print up pink camo shirts that say "Cuddletart" You know they'd sell!

[Jester]

All the while without a shred of fabric covering you below the waist to protect your jibbles from the cruel northern winds.

We shall get you your pants, my friend, and your jibbles shall be cold no more.

I know the guy's Canadian, but to still HAVE jibbles after roaming pantsless in the Great White North? Sorry, I have to call shenanigans on that one!

So I got to ride all the way downtown with some strange woman pressed up against me so hard that even a drunken pervert that hits on underage girls looked at her and went “Hey, come on now, that’s not cool.”

You know it's bad when even the greasy old pervs think it's bad.

To be fair, GK, by your own accounting it's been a while since you've had some action, so perhaps you missed out on a golden opportunity. Just a thought.

I love this city.

Duh. How could you not? I love that city, and I have never even been there!

Why do you struggle against reality? Reality is going to win every time. It’s rather stubborn that way.

Maybe that person has watched Mythbusters often enough that they have subscribed to Adam's philosophy: "I reject your reality and substitute my own."

anywho GK.....you need a permenant IV drop of booze of your choice...

He does, but sadly, GK does not drink, despite all our suggestions, and in spite of all his callers and fellow mass transit travelers who are so desperately trying to drive him to do just that.

Dude, at some point shouldn't you recognize when the world is giving you a hint?

I never get molested on public transport, I have to molest myself.

Even in weird places like Vancouver and Key West, that is generally an arrestable offense. Just so ya know.

I ask myself this every single day.

No you don't. You don't ask HOW they call you. You ask why.

Oh, and Joi, where do you live that people don't all have the poem memorized already?

I never even heard of it till a few minutes ago. I live in the Florida Keys, but have also lived in the Southwest and Northeast of the U.S. Never once heard that one. And I do read, thank you very much, as my library of a living room will attest to.

Is the Skytrain crowded enough that you don't sit at the aisle to discourage company?

I am rather surprised by this too.

GK, while I don't ride mass transit anymore, I have in the past, especially for those few years in Phoenix when I was vehicularly challenged. Now, I don't know about you, but wherever I am working, I bring with me a backpack. It is good to have to keep sundry items: change of clothes (if your job requires a uniform), books, magazines, ipod, breath mints, umbrella, extra warm clothing if the potential for change in weather exists, notebook, pens, and on special occasions, a nine iron (don't ask).

In any case, that backpack is more than merely a piece of luggage that enables me to carry way too much shit with me. It is a barrier, a guardian, an obstacle that is very useful to keep the unwanted masses away. Say you are sitting on a train or bus. And you want to be Left Alone. You can either sit on the aisle with your pack on the window seat, effectively telling the world, "piss off, I have too much damn stuff, sit somewhere else," until such time as the metal tube of your choice gets so full that you are forced to give up your extra seat. Or you can do what I often did, which was sit in the window seat, with the pack on the aisle seat, effectively telling the world, "piss off, I have too much damn stuff, and I really don't want you anywhere near me, I am an antisocial jackass, so sit somewhere else....and if you even think of bothering me, I will beat you to a pulp with this pack."

Laugh if you will. The Pack Defense System works.

[Magpie]

The pack defense system doesn't work even here (and we have low ridership). It will just force you to actually interact with someone, when they tell you to take it off the seat. I find, though, that the modified pack defense system works wonderfully - put everything on your lap, even before someone gets desperate enough to sit in the rear-facing seats that all the jerks use as footrests (they're somewhat gross for some reason). At this point you're so busy holding everything together that you have an excuse for not acknowledging anyone else, while people will tend to give you room until it becomes necessary for others to sit down. And no one comes by to enforce transit etiquette.

And at this junction I must ask: since people further South doesn't seem to know The Cremation of Sam McGee, what poems to teenagers memorize to creep out their less literate peers? I don't know any others like that, which means that my friends might not know them either, and I will get to be the one to disturb everyone again! Mwahahahah! *ahem*

[LadyAndreca]

And at this junction I must ask: since people further South doesn't seem to know The Cremation of Sam McGee, what poems to teenagers memorize to creep out their less literate peers? I don't know any others like that, which means that my friends might not know them either, and I will get to be the one to disturb everyone again! Mwahahahah! *ahem*

Does having "Jabberwocky" memorized count? Also, I had to memorize "Annabelle Lee" by Edgar Allan Poe in middle school...

I remember reading "The Cremation of Sam McGee" as a kid, but the only lines I memorized were the last couple. Dad had an amusing way of reading it.