In which a pervert runs away...

[Lady J'ssem]

I know I've mentioned it before, but its been a while since I posted, so again, I work in a public library in a downtown area. We get our homeless, creeps, and weirdos all the time, doesn't bother me too much. Then there's the perverts...

A little background on me. I'm 23, 24 this May, but everyone who meets me is surprised by this, cause I look 15, 18 is the oldest guess I've gotten. Makes some things awkward (I've been carded for a pg-13 movie, when I was going to chaperon my baby sister, who was only 14 at the time, and she didn't get any questions asked ). But because of my "youthful" appreance I can get a little weirded out by flirts and things. Also I am engaged to be married, hopefully sometime this year, (just need a better job, lol!)

A funny story first! A couple months ago, I was working in our Adult Fic section, putting away books, was in the middle of my shift, when I had this older gentleman wave at me. I waved back, even though I hadn't ever seen him before, but hey, always nice to see a friendly patron, right? A few minutes later he came over whilst I was putting away more books.

OG - Hi! How're you?

Me - I'm pretty good, and how're about you?

OG - Oh fine, fine. Ready to get out of here?

Me - ??? Ah, heh, yeah, but still got a couple hours left.

The old guy then makes a come here guester, I moved beside my cart, staying in plain site of the desk,

OG - You should come over to my place, getcha some sweet tea.

It took everything not to laugh right there. This guy was at least old enough to be my da' if not my granddad, and he was making the "drinking" hand guester while he made his offer. So instead I just gave him a big smile,

Me - Nah, thank you though, I'm already engaged.

OG - Ah, your busy, another time, another time...

Then he wandered off, cheerful as could be. I told my coworkers and a manager about it right after, and they all laughed about it. Though I did mention him to our security guard at the time, juuust in case he was thinking I was a lot younger then I am. But still makes me laugh.

Today though, wasn't a laughing matter.

A bit of background. There's a younger guy that tended to hang out around the library. Seemed nice enough, kindda quiet, but kept to him-self and didn't argue with any of the ladies... But he had an odd habit of following me around. I've told my fiance jokingly that he's my stalker.

Couple weeks ago he was hanging out awfully close to my cart, and when he did ask for a book, and I'd show him where to look or hand him something... He'd go back to that spot without a book.... I started wandering around, and he went to stand infront of my cart looking at relgion books, and I kindda snapped a "Is there anything I can help you with?" at him, he disappeared after that....

Then today he was back, and again hanging out near my cart. This isn't a bad looking guy, he tends to wear more expensive stuff then I certainly can afford. We exchanged greetings, (note I don't know his name, nor he mine,) and I get to putting away books. Its a little more odd for him to be in the room I'm was in today, since I was working in JuvNon, and he didn't have any kids with him. plus He makes it a little difficult by making me have to squeeze by him to get to my cart. I'm not exactly small of waist.

I get a good bit put away and start working on the back shelves... he moves over there. I was on my hands and knees putting up things, when I glance over at him, cause he is kindda in my personal bubble... And for a moment I thought I saw his "joystick" out. I moved away, thinking nahhh I just was seeing things... But I move to a different part of the shelf just in case... Again I had to bend down, and I notice the guy had followed me, but was behind the bookcase I was working on... and was pulling down his zipper of his pants...

Yeah that did it. I put my books on my cart, and could feel him watching me (I'm kindda sensitive to that), glanced back and yuup definitely watching me. I then moved to the desk and let the ladies know right off. One of them went to go check in the room I was working in...

And who do you guess goes the long way, and all but runs down the back stairs? I point him out to the lady I was talking to, but he vanished... And there's no sight of him anywhere. So I get stuck filling out all sorts of paperwork, and describing and redescribing him and what happened.

True the guy is offically banned.... whenever we find out his name... But until then I have to look out for him, and point him out if he's even anywhere near the library...

Sadly, this really took away my good mood today, and honestly and truly scared me... And didn't have one of our big mean security guards to sick on him. Doesn't help that a friend of my fiance sent an article about stalkers being scorned and kidnapping the people they were focused on... without my fiance telling him about it...

Not a good day of work...

[Cookie]

Oh my gosh! That's horrible! I'm so sorry you had such a disturbing day at work. Are you allowed to carry pepper spray in your pocket? It might come in handy. I'm not sure if I'm supposed to at work, but I keep some around bc people come down to breakfast still drunk and we've nearly had fights break out. (And we only have security overnight. Grrrr!) The chef knows I have it. Perhaps that would make you feel a little safer?

[Caffienated_Caramel]

Oh no I hope he gets spotted again. And I hope not from you. I would hate to see anyone get jumped or move in their personal bubble.

I'd keep the pepper spray on a belt loop or somewhere easy access but concealed so if he gets closes enough. Spray the bastard down.

[Taboo]

Echoing pepper spray or mace, just make sure it is legal to carry it where you are (in some big cities there are weird laws about this and some make you register it as a weapon).

What a creep! I'm glad you're alright, at least.

[ottid]

Another option, you could always try body spray instead of pepper spray or mace, you just want to smell nice right? I have a small travel can in my handbag, had the lid off with my hand on it in my pocket the one night I left work at 2.15am (grr stock take that I was told would finish at 9pm) when I was waiting for my taxi, lots of drunk people walking around in the middle of town. Thankfully didn't use it

[Merriweather]

Another option, you could always try body spray instead of pepper spray or mace, you just want to smell nice right? I have a small travel can in my handbag, had the lid off with my hand on it in my pocket the one night I left work at 2.15am (grr stock take that I was told would finish at 9pm) when I was waiting for my taxi, lots of drunk people walking around in the middle of town. Thankfully didn't use it

If you keep a body spray as a weapon, just be sure and use it as well - nowadays a person inflicting harm on another person in self defense can often end up in court themselves - and heaven forbid the other side be able to convince a jury that you had a "weapon" already prepared.

I remember one case where after some woman's group suggested women carry those old fashioned big hat pins for defense, the police made sure to let it be known that if you're carrying a big ole hat pin, you'd better be wearing a hat, or you could be arrested for concealing a dangerous weapon.

Great world we live in, but you gotta protect yourself not only physically, but legally as well.

[ottid]

Hence the reason why I said "smell nice" which is the actual reason it is in my bag, I was going somewhere and it was a really hot day, I've just never gotten around to taking it out, I'm not usually in situations which would warrant me needing it for self defense.

[saturnz_dragon]

Wow, what a creep. Sorry you had to go through that; I know I would be freaked out by that! But like everyone is saying, carry body spray with you. I used to whenever I lived in town and went out for a walk, just in case. I hope they catch that loser and chop off his "joystick" as you put it.

[earl colby pottinger]

Spray

Don't forget some 'cheap' perfumes stink so bad if used in large amounts that they should be banned as chemical weapons.

[StanFlouride]

Unfortunately, you can't use, "I was just about to clean my oven." as an excuse for carrying oven-cleaner (a much more formidable response to pervs).

[Seshat]

That one can cause actual damage even to people without allergies or chemical sensitivities. Therefore, as a mod, I will make the point that we do not recommend violence here.

As for both the mace and the perfume suggestions: be aware of the possibility of collateral damage to bystanders with allergies or chemical sensitivities. Keep yourself safe, but if there's people around, consider using a 'making a scene' defence instead of the spray.

[Lady J'ssem]

Thanks ya'll, for your good thoughts and suggestions. I do have pepperspray, but I'm not allowed to take it with me into the library, however it is attached to my keys, so I have a defense going to my car at least.

I ended up staying home today to just cool off and relax, my work is rather cool about things. Some of the ladies suggested I went home early yesterday, but was near the end of my shift anyway, might as well stay, yeah?

No news on the creepo, sadly. But good news on new job front, I had a phone interview with an insurance company, and it sounds promising. Then at least all the sucky customers I have to deal with is on the phone, and (hopefully) no more creepo ones!

I can dream right?

[Caffienated_Caramel]

Ah, creepy ones will never go away. Just their occurrence is far less frequent over the phone.

Good luck on the interview.