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  • #1

    short stories...

    SO I've started a job with the US census bureau for a few months to earn some money for some major trips coming up....

    its easy...walk to a door, knock, and either A) conduct an interview that takes at MOST 10 minutes, or B) leave a notice on the door for people to call me to conduct said interview.

    2 LOVELY stories...

    Physco "Lady"

    Go to ladies house, sit in my car a minute to get my paper work together and make sure I have all my handouts to conduct the interview. While I'm doing all this, little boy comes out of house stands 10 feet from my car and looks at me then goes back inside.

    Pretty obvious someone is home...right?

    So I go to the door and knock......then ring the door bell.......and no one comes....so I leave a notice on the door and go on to my next house.

    not 5 minutes later, I get a call on my cell phone and its physco lady that I just left the house from....and proceeds to talk down to me, saying how *I* must of screwed up because *I* didn't recieve her form in the mail that she "made the time to take to the postoffice to mail it personally and doesn't have time to fill it out again and waste time."

    ....she goes on this rant for almost 10 minutes....in that time she could of had the form filled out OVER the phone....but hung up on me before I could get anything out of her.

    Dog Man

    So another neighborhood, another set of people....this time in a low income housing area. So I go to this "gentleman's" floor and knock on his apartment. Dog is barking its head off inside and he finally answers.

    I identifiy myself and ask if he would take the time to fill out the form with me. He tells me now is not a good time, so I go to hand him a notice with my number to call me...

    SC: Well I just don't feel like it.
    ME: Sir its a federal law that everyone must fill one out. (very true...I've heard the consequences for not filling one out....its easier and CHEAPER to just do it then not)
    SC: Well I just don't want to, nore do I care.

    He then shuts the door in my face....idiot.
    It is by snark alone I set my mind in motion. It is by the juice of the coffee bean that thoughts acquire 'tude, the lips acquire mouthiness, the glares become a warning.
    Tags: None
  • #2
    I filled mine out in february. The census came in the mail. ^_^
    Ridiculous 2009 Predictions: Evil Queen will beat Martha Stewart to death with a muffin pan. All hail Evil Queen! (Some things don't need elaboration.....) -- Jester

    Ridiculous 2010 Predictions: Evil Queen, after escaping prison for last years prediction, goes out and waffle irons Rachel Ray to death. -- SG15Z

    Ridiculous 2011 Prediction: Evil Queen will beat Gordon Ramsay over the head with a cast-iron skillet. -- FireHeart

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    • #3
      I had thought about applying for one of those jobs, but my mom talked me out of it for this very reason; you never know what you're walking into. Stay safe.
      Steven Slater ROCKS! So does James Jones!

      The world is an asshole contest...and EVERYONE'S A WINNER!

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      • #4
        Let the Dog Man pay for his little lesson. Hopefully it'll stick for another 10 years.
        To right the countless wrongs of our days... We shine this light of true redemption, that this place may become as paradise...Oh, what a wonderful world such would be...

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        • #5
          Good luck with being a Census taker, Sarlon. I've heard that some people are so paranoid about giving out any sort of personal information. My wife has filled ours out and mailed it back in already.
          The Borg wouldn't know fun if they assimilated an amusement park. -- B'Elanna Torres, Star Trek: Voyager

          Math! Math, my dear boy, is but the lesbian sister of Biology. -- Peter Griffin, Family Guy

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          • #6
            Hmm, in NZ they have someone go to everyones door, ask how many people will be in the house on census night, leave the required number of forms, and then comes to collect after said night. Guess it could be harder in places with a larger population...
            Began work Aug as casual '08
            Ex-coworkers from current place of work: 26ish
            Current co-workers at current place of work: 15ish - yes he just hired 3 more casuals
            Why do I still work there again?

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            • #7
              Quoth ottid View Post
              Hmm, in NZ they have someone go to everyones door, ask how many people will be in the house on census night, leave the required number of forms, and then comes to collect after said night. Guess it could be harder in places with a larger population...
              they do the same in Ausland. Although slightly different case-they actually leave out 6 forms and expect people to mail back the rest.
              The best professors are mad scientists! -Zoom

              Now queen of USSR-Land...

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              • #8
                I just quit that job this morning, after having one of the supervisors pointing out the tiny errors I had made in front of everyone. I don't mind being shown how to fix something, but there's no need to embarrass me in the process. Oh, and don't tell me I did it wrong when you never told me how to do it. Thanks.
                NPCing: the ancient art of acting out your multiple personality disorder in a setting where someone else might think there's nothing wrong with you.

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                • #9
                  We have laws in the US about turning in the census forms.

                  I'm not sure, but I have heard that we don't have any laws regarding actually telling the truth on the census forms.

                  ^-.-^
                  Faith is about what you do. It's about aspiring to be better and nobler and kinder than you are. It's about making sacrifices for the good of others. - Dresden

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                  • #10
                    My brother is working for the census too, and when he read your post, he said to talk to your supervisor and let them know what they said. If it plays out the way it did for one of his cases, the U.S. Marshals will pay the dick a visit. That will make psycho bitch happy too...
                    ~LSTYD~
                    Quote: Dalesys:
                    you may want to take a census of your brain squirrels... maybe one escaped?

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                    • #11
                      Quoth Andara Bledin View Post
                      We have laws in the US about turning in the census forms.

                      ^-.-^
                      Yup, same in NZ, actually, the famous Christchurch Wizard used to travel out to sea on Census night (far enough so he didn't have to fill out a form) so no one knew his real identity We all do now though.
                      Began work Aug as casual '08
                      Ex-coworkers from current place of work: 26ish
                      Current co-workers at current place of work: 15ish - yes he just hired 3 more casuals
                      Why do I still work there again?

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                      • #12
                        Quoth Andara Bledin View Post
                        I'm not sure, but I have heard that we don't have any laws regarding actually telling the truth on the census forms.

                        ^-.-^
                        that is very true... in fact there have been recently a lot of news about high level census officials incouraging people to fill out the form with fraudulant information as a form of protest (I of course won't go into details as it is most definitely in fratching territory)
                        If you wish to find meaning, listen to the music not the song

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                        • #13
                          I do not envy your job. On the one hand you have right-wing radio and TV, whipping everyone into a frenzy that the Census is some new socialist ploy (despite the fact the census has been around for hundreds of years), and on the other extreme you have "word on the street" having people believe it's being used as a tool to round up and deport illegal immigrants. Agh.. the suckiness is everywhere.
                          I will never go to school!

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                          • #14
                            The only thing I did not understand about the census was that I received a notice in the mail that I would be receiving the census, then I received the census (and filled it out and sent it back) then received another notice that I should already have received the census. <question deleted to avoid fratching.> Now I'm just waiting for the door-to-door person...
                            Everything will be ok in the end. If it's not ok, it's not the end.

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                            • #15
                              Not only is it a law to fill out the forms, it's in our Constitution-a census every ten years!
                              Dull women have immaculate homes.

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