it finally happened, and now I need a very strong drink

[smileyeagle1021]

We were told that it wasn't a question of if, but when stuff like this would happen.
I've already relayed calls where I've had to interpret for abusive boyfriends, I've relayed calls where I've had to interpret for spoiled children disrespecting their parents, I've had to relay calls where the caller was an SC, but tonight I took one that was truly horrific.
Tonight, dear SC, you have driven me to drinking.
Tonight, I had an abusive parent request that I mentally and verbally abuse their child.
You dear sir, have a special place in hell for you



As a completely unrelated side note, since I was in a pissy mood all night (for obvious reasons). To the douchebags who asked me to redial numbers for 20 minutes. A little cultural note on telephones and hearing people. When you call a hearing person over and over again for 20 minutes and refuse to leave a message, they don't get the message that what you have to say is important... they get the message that you are a self important douchebag... just thought you should know.

[underemployeed]

never a good sign when you leave work KNOWING you will have to drink. Signs of needing a change at work was when I started considering 151 as a sleeping aid.

[Chromatix]

Eeegh. Aren't there any safeguards in your system for that?

[Hanzoku]

I know your system is supposed to act as a neutral entity in any phone call, but... can't you ban a user from the service for this stuff?

Sorry you had to deal with that call.

[Exaspera]

And you actually had to say that stuff?!

[Shalom]

Which direction were you going? (Meaning, who was the hearing-impaired party, the abusive parent or the child?)

I realise you have to repeat word for word what you are given to say, but I was wondering if there was any way you could lessen the impact of what you were saying. Possibly by modulating the tone of your voice (flat monotone or such), but I wouldn't have any idea which way would make it hurt less.

(If you were hearing voice and sending text, there's really not a hell of a lot you can do, I guess.)

My condolences on being made an unwilling accomplice to abuse. Isn't there something you can do to/about the sender that wouldn't fall afoul of FCC regs? Are any records kept of these conversations? Request supervisor monitoring or something like that?

[Magpie]

Bummer.

[EricKei]

Eeegh. Aren't there any safeguards in your system for that?

I have gotten the impression from other posts like these that it's quite the opposite -- that the worker MUST relay everything verbatim, short of something overtly illegal like a death threat o_O (hopefully) -- the consequences of refusal being fired and essentially blacklisted as "incompetent" >_<

Sucks to have to relay stuff like that >_< Here, have some and some. It sounds like you could use some of both.

[smileyeagle1021]

I have gotten the impression from other posts like these that it's quite the opposite -- that the worker MUST relay everything verbatim, short of something overtly illegal like a death threat o_O (hopefully) -- the consequences of refusal being fired and essentially blacklisted as "incompetent" >_<

Nope, we even have to relay everything verbatim including stuff that is overtly illegal (the exception being if there is reasonable cause to believe that the caller is not actually deaf and is committing relay fraud).

[Dips]

Eeegh. Aren't there any safeguards in your system for that?

I know your system is supposed to act as a neutral entity in any phone call, but... can't you ban a user from the service for this stuff?

And you actually had to say that stuff?!

No, no and yes. Deaf people have the same right to access the phone system as everyone else. And that includes the right to be a raging and abusive asshole just like anybody else.

If somebody who doesn't rely on relay wouldn't normally face consequences for that behavior then people who rely on relay are not going to face consequences. To do otherwise would be discriminating against people for being deaf or deafblind.

To smiley:

I wish I knew what to say. That's truly suck-tastic.

I know you're supposed to think of yourself as a machine just passing the message through. And you're no more responsible for the content of the message than the telephone equipment is responsible for abusive voice to voice calls.

But you can't turn the fact that you're a human being off and on at will.

[XCashier]

That really, really sucks that you had to go through that, Smiley. Some people have absolutely no sense of decency or shame.

Poor kid, not only being abused, but knowing someone else knows about it. Parent, you deserve a feet-first trip through

[klhanson]

If smileys job is under the same regulations my job was under we couldn't even report anything to the cops.. like drug sales and things like that.
We also had to take sex calls.. which was just plain weird.

[Seshat]

Smiley...

for having the courage and sheer GUTS to provide the service you do.

However, do take the time out to let it pass. Their problems are not yours. Perhaps speak to a counsellor or .. or a GOOD priest/minister (not the judgemental sort, the caring sort), or a doctor, and get advice for letting other peoples' problems not mess up YOUR day.

There are - now - many resources available to abused people of most sorts. Once they get the courage to self-assertion to face the problem, they can find those resources and get help. It doesn't have to - and shouldn't - fall on any one person's shoulders.

In your job, you are providing a crucial service.
Outside your work, I'm sure you support many people in your subset of the community - just from hearing the type of person you are, and knowing the damage your local subset of your community must be suffering.

Sadly, you can't be everywhere for everyone. Be proud of the help you DO provide.

[smileyeagle1021]

If smileys job is under the same regulations my job was under we couldn't even report anything to the cops.. like drug sales and things like that.
We also had to take sex calls.. which was just plain weird.

nope, the only thing we are allowed to report is abuse of the relay system... otherwise everything we relay is under even stronger confidentiality even than priests.
As far as sex calls, I've taken them before... not as weird as you'd think. I actually got to take a sex call between two guys, that was fun (I have never actually had phone sex with my boyfriend, so that was a new experience for me )... and I just LOVE when the deaf user forgets to ask for a female interpreter (only a deaf user may request a change in interpreter for a different gender) and they end up calling their straight boyfriend/husband... oh, you can hear them squirm