Abusive Ex Husband

[Whiskey]

I did tell her my fellow CS posters (I showed her some stories LOL She's become a fangirl) is on her side. She said thank you And yes, he's arrested and in jail, for picking a fight with one of my Marines. Dumbass. 6'7 black as night, brit man running on 2 hours of sleep who just wanted 1 beer.

yaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyy


ayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

yayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

yyyyyyyyyyyyyayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy yy


thats all i got. maybe a sassy gif give me minute

This should be her at her ex


sassy as IDGAF shes free. Be fierce, you free bitch. You deserve nothing but the best.

edit: I am 5'3", white as rice, and not a marine in the slightest and I will fuck a bitch up just let me know. i aint got shit else to do. These earrings are clip-ons, they come off easy.

[superhotelworker]

<3 Whiskey, ya fricken rule

[Null Requiem]

There are two times in my life that I have wanted to kill someone in cold blood. It still pisses me off thinking about this. I didn't find out the extent of either of these situations until much later, or I probably would have.

Both were abusive people. One was the bastard who abused my mom. (I was still young then, maybe 11 or 12, she was able to stop me before I went in and smashed his head in with a baseball bat while he was in a drunken stupor)

And the second was someone who I found out had been abusing my sister. Stupid her, she let him into my place (which she had been staying at), and I grabbed my bat and told him to get out, he wasn't welcome there. He blustered a bit but left the apartment. I went out to make sure he left, and pointed out to him that if I ever saw him or heard he was in town at all, I would still have my bat handy. He took the point, and left, at a sprint if I remember correctly. I hope he is still running today.

Don't mess with my family. It makes me very very angry. We may not be close, but we're still family.

[Wenchie]

I flinch when people raise their voices to me and avoid confrontation. And cry to easily. *sigh* Couple of reasons why... first is that I've been in a couple of bad relationships. One was 4 years ago... the guy manipulated me into thinking that I was worthless... on top of sexually abusing me. He did everything except raise a hand... sexual abuse, mental abuse, emotional abuse... but he was very careful not to hit me or do anything that would leave marks. When he finally DID hit me, I somehow broke free of the mental chains and GTFO. I crashed with a friend until I found a place, and it's amazing how quickly a group of friends will move you out of someone's apartment while keeping him away from you at the same time.

Unfortunately, I'm still trying to convince myself that I'm worth something. Because it's hard to believe. Which is probably why I fell into another abusive situation... guy I was dating last year decided that he wasn't going to take "no" for an answer. Even admitted afterward that even though I said "no" he figured it would be ok if he could manage to turn me on enough... and then he used the fact that he knew exactly how to turn me on to make me feel horrible.... it took me a long time to actually understand that he did rape me, because he had twisted my mind all up.

Oh yeah... fun fact too.. I have almost no memories before 4th grade. No history of injury or abuse that anyone is aware of, but I have to think that there was something... why else would I forget my childhood completely?

[DeltaSierra]

I've been in a couple of bad relationships. One was 4 years ago... the guy manipulated me into thinking that I was worthless... on top of sexually abusing me. He did everything except raise a hand... sexual abuse, mental abuse, emotional abuse... but he was very careful not to hit me or do anything that would leave marks. When he finally DID hit me, I somehow broke free of the mental chains and GTFO.

This was my ex too. Sometimes I had wished he HAD hit me, because I had always equated "abuse" as being the physical kind, and would have left him in a heartbeat. I didn't know then what I know now about how damaging emotional, and mental abuse are as well. Sometimes even more so - at least physicall scars heal. Is it any wonder I shed no tears when I found out he died last month?

[Mytical]

While I have a few self esteem issues of my own, I've never understood how some females think they are not the beautiful people they are. Yeah, yeah I know it sounds corny. Everybody (male OR female) deserves somebody who helps them feel attractive and special. Somebody who will make every day special, and remind them just how amazing they are. This works both ways of course, and every relationship should be a 50/50 one. It doesn't always work out that way, sometimes you have to give more because your SO is feeling bad or down..and sometimes they have to give more because you are.

I just wish people could see that they are wonderful, and can be wonderful. It doesn't care what OTHERS think of you, its what you think of yourself that is important. Still, it helps when somebody looks at you and says. "You are beautiful (or handsome) and amazing."

[smileyeagle1021]

I've had to deal with this at the hotel too.
I actually eventually did learn to love this woman's brother though. She was set up for no call, no visitor, no even confirming that she was at the hotel. Her brother decided to test this. He called in insisting that he be connected to her room, called repeatedly in fact, finally showed up demanded to know where she was and even offered to pay me to tell me where she was. Right as I was getting ready to call 911 he stopped me and said "very good, this hotel will do", pulled out his cell phone, called the woman who was going to be staying (she hadn't actually gone into her room yet apparently, had only checked in) and told her "this staff knows what they are doing, they won't let him bother you" and he helped her get her stuff in her room (he was the only person allowed in the room other than her). Yeah, I will admit to being a bit pissed about having been put through that, but I have to respect a man who will go that far to ensure that his sister is safe.
And then there is the woman who I am sheltering in my apartment right now, who's husband is... well, I don't think there are words in the English language strong enough to describe what kind of scum this guy is. He has been informed independently by me, my fiance, and our roommate, that if our friend calls us and asks us to get her out of his home, we will do whatever is required to get her out and that does include the use of force. Now to give you an idea, our roommate is trained in mixed martial arts, my fiance is a sword enthusiast and is trained to use them, and I have a walking staff collection and a decent supply of pepper mace... he knows it is in his best interest to let her walk out and not contest us... Utah police may not give a shit about domestic abuse, but Utah juries sure do, and it's the jury who you have to convince that what we did was not in fact self defense.

[zombiequeen]

That's like the guy that did all the crap he did to me. We never dated, so it wasn't abuse, right? WRONG. I still have scars, and if I'm not completely comfortable, then no, we won't be doing anything. My husband is very much ok with this, it's better than me completely getting scared and not wanting to do anything at all.
Even though my brother and the creep are still best friends, he told me he would do anything I needed him to do if creep bothered me again. He has also taken pictures of the hole in the wall my husband made when I told him what creep had done to me, and shown him. He knows better.

[Mouse]

Muahaha. We have a marine stationed in the rooms next to her and the one across from her. Come pick a fight now dude! You know you wanna come try! Make our day. They want to play, and they call me Little sister. Muahahah.

J just told me they checked in. I's excited! They'll be there Til Sunday. My boys are home! <3

totally just had a bioshock moment

[Cazzi]

I just wish people could see that they are wonderful, and can be wonderful. It doesn't care what OTHERS think of you, its what you think of yourself that is important. Still, it helps when somebody looks at you and says. "You are beautiful (or handsome) and amazing."

It does, even if you don't quite believe them at first, but if they say it often enough then it sort of creates the thought that, hmm, they might actually mean that!

I've had self esteem issues all my life, was bullied through school, mainly because I was just that little bit different. At primary school (pre 11 years old) I think it was because I was a bright bookish child mostly brought up by a middle class mother in a working class council estate area. High school I know it was because I came from the council estate... and I was one of the few who won a place in the Girls grammar school, rather than go to the local comprehensive, so of course I was the commoner who'd dared go where the "better" people went

I was married in my 20s to my ex, who seemed to think I should do what he wanted, have kids, work full time and do most of the housekeeping etc. About that time, I seemed to lose friends but had to stand around quiet while he talked to his friends if we were out. If I disagreed with him he managed to tell people I was suffering from depression or some other mental illness. And other stuff I don't want to go into or this post will end up a novel

After I split up from ex I seemed to lose all emotions, I couldn't feel anything, couldn't cry etc. Even a counsellor told me he was amazed at how well I was coping with everything that life had thrown at me... by this time I'd almost lost my house & my father & grandmother had died too. But I wasn't coping, one day I did something silly, can't remember exactly what set me off, might have been a stubbed toe or something that I went into complete meltdown.. I cried for hours.
After that , esteem just hit rock bottom.

Its taken the last 4-5 years to pull myself up to the state where I can look in the mirror & think, "yeah, you look ok". 4 years ago I wouldn't have been posting here. Left to my own devices, I'd probably have gone back to that fugue state I was in, but I got myself online & found people, I've made good friends, including my male BFF who is probably the most responsible for me "getting better". I'm not 100% confident but I'm much better than I was.

So Mytical, your words hit it right on the nail for me. Thank you

[Whiskey]

That's like the guy that did all the crap he did to me. We never dated, so it wasn't abuse, right? WRONG. I still have scars, and if I'm not completely comfortable, then no, we won't be doing anything. My husband is very much ok with this, it's better than me completely getting scared and not wanting to do anything at all.
Even though my brother and the creep are still best friends, he told me he would do anything I needed him to do if creep bothered me again. He has also taken pictures of the hole in the wall my husband made when I told him what creep had done to me, and shown him. He knows better.

he'll do anything but not be "friends" with the guy? If my "friend" abused my best friend (i dont have siblings), I would not be friends with them and they would not have front teeth

[Mytical]

Anytime. It's how I feel and think. If you feel good about yourself, and (hopefully) have somebody who sees that you are wonderful, then you are doing awesome. Though it matters more what you think about yourself, it is always good to hear it from somebody else. People scoff because I see the good in people, and want them to see the good in themselves..but I am ok with that. Everybody has something that makes them special and unique. Some it is harder to find then others, but it is there.

There are 'supermodels' that are the ugliest people alive because of how they act, and others who realize that it is that inner beauty and spark that matters. They are the real beautiful people. So the next time, don't look in a mirror and say "I am ok.", say "I am beautiful." because you are.

Edit : Please note I have no clue what you look like. You could be a supermodel, but it doesn't matter to be honest. Because it is the person inside that decides true beauty. So..let that inner beauty shine through .

[Cazzi]

I will get to that one day.. honestly

All in all though, even with all the problems in my life, I still feel I'm lucky, as reading this thread has proved, there are people are a lot worse off than me. Such people that have gone through their personal hells and come out the other side in my mind are heros, as are the people who have rallied round to help them.
Its given my faith in the human race a much needed boost!

PS, Mytical, supermodel I'm not, I'm shortish, very fluffy & slightly quirky looking... I guess you could say I'm unique
I have been told that my avie is a quite good likeness!

[taxguykarl]

^^
and sometimes its the OUTSIDE support that is the final trigger.

That was the case for me...when I was still with my abusive crack-loving ex-GF.
She was so sweet when she wanted more cash to fund a binge, but an unholy terror when the money ran out. She once haranged me throughout the night when I refused to go to an ATM at 2 in the morning to get more cash for drugs.
She even tried to use a DV call as an extortion vehicle: "Give me drug money or I'll call the police on you for beating me." She had a shiner from one of her drug dealers, but one of the officers recognized her--Nice try. [Sidenote: This nonsense is probably one of the reasons some police get cynical about DV calls.]
It came to a head when she did a basic bitch procedure : She sucker punched me and then called police. The officer saw right through it an took her to Cook County Hospital 'for evaluation'...in reality OUT of the apartment at my request. She left her keys behind and had to get an all-night ride from her 'real BF' (i.e. male fellow crackhead).
Yes, this incident occurred a couple of weeks after I started seeing the now-Mrs. TGK--crackhead was seeing someone else as well for several months that I knew about probably longer.
I credit her and the police sergeant who told me point blank: "[ex-GF] is not going to get her act together. That kind never does."

yet another reason I will one day have to go meet Jester.

I'll say 'Hi' for you when we're in Key West in another 6 weeks...we plan to stop by his bar after visiting the Hemmingway Museum.

As for the situation in the OP, I'm glad to see it all worked worked out in the end. She didn't go back to that piece of work and the lowlife got arrested (let's see how tough he is in the slammer).

[superhotelworker]

Sweet. Thanks TGK