The problem with spray textures.

[ShadowTiger]

Okay. So my hardware store has a very impressive wall of spray paints. Whereas most stores have one, one or two cages, we have half a wall, very well stocked. I love stocking 'em. I know exactly what we do and do not have.

(Plus, the boxes that you flatten after stocking make incredible frisbees. >:-] )

So yeah, there was this woman who was asking if we carried a "striped" spraypaint. I told her that such a thing is impossible as far as textures spraypaint goes.

She would absolutely not believe me. She pointed to the camouflage spraypaint, and told me that it paints camouflage exactly as she wanted it to look. I've never used it before, so wouldn't know. But I did tell her that the pattern she paints doesn't depend on where the can is relative to the wall, or even where her arm goes; it depends on the spray mechanism in the can, and the layout and functionality of its internals.

I mean, I can understand a rotating internal mechanism to distribute individual canisters of separate colors in a clockwise or counterclockwise pattern to be sprayed out, but how do you do it with plaid or stripes or polka dots?


So I did my usual trick: I asked her how such a thing is done. She didn't know, of course, and she said "You should know, you work here" (Why do they ALWAYS Say that!!! I'm not even one of the paint guys.) and of course, I reply "Well, yes, I do happen to know. I know exactly what we do and do not have, and I assure you there is no such thing here as a plaid or striped spraypaint."

That argument seems to placate them. <(o-o)>

[sylvier]

Your customers probably watch all the home reno shows and think that that they can re-create the magic of television with a can of special paint

[terakhan]

Sounds to me like she may have been sniffing some paint before coming in to buy more.

Regardless, even if someone were to invent a stripe spraying paint can, I guarantee every single person who bought it would be trying to return it because the stripes were crooked or wavy.

[StanFlouride]

My store also had the 'Camouflage' color (an O.D. green) and more than once I was asked whether it came out in a camo pattern. *sigh*

[Dave1982]

Do you have the color "Al?" *ducks

(bonus points for the reference!)

[Krivak]

Dunno what you're talkin about Dave, flannel is cool. (finally got a reference around here for once...)

[dalesys]

But they do it (stripes) with toothpaste!