The Tale of Dr. Pepper and "It's Not a Teriyaki!"

[TheTigress]

These are more stupid than sucky, but still annoying.

Dr. Pepper, you say?

Usually it's the veggies that are called completely strange things. For example:

Pepper cinis/banana peppers have been called the following at my work:
-Cappuccinos
-Fettuccines
-(insert something else I don't remember)

Tonight we had this stereotypical trailer trash family come in. They were borderline sucky in that they were slow to decide what they wanted even though they had plenty of time to look at the menu while the dad was using the restroom. They also mumbled and had a hard time paying attention to their order, and in general acted like they weren't all the way there. But that's not the important part of this story.

The oldest kid orders his sandwich first. He looked to be about 10 years old, maybe 11. He didn't seem very bright and basically had to have his dad walk him through the simplest of things such as which sandwich he even wanted to order.

After we get that he wants a turkey on white bread, I ask him what type of cheese he wanted. He mumbles something to me which I asked him to repeat because I couldn't hear him. He mumbles again and this time his dad jumps in and says "That's pepper-jack, not Dr. Pepper! Dr. Pepper is a soda!" I shit you not. Apparently the kid was telling me he wanted "Dr. Pepper" as his cheese this whole time. I dunno, maybe my standards are too high but good Lord.

"I want a Teriyaki but but don't you dare call it that!"

This one actually happened to my co-worker tonight but after he told me about it I knew it had to be posted on here.

A guy came in and he said he wanted a chicken bacon ranch, but with the teriyaki chicken instead of the chicken used for the chicken bacon ranch, and also no bacon.

Co-worker = CW
Idiot= idiot

CW: So you want the Teriyaki then?
Idiot: No, I want the chicken bacon ranch but with the teriyaki chicken and no bacon.
CW: So you're getting the teriyaki...
Idiot: No, NOT the teriyaki! *lather, rinse, repeat same shit*
CW: *mentally face palms and just makes the sandwich*


Subway: Where the idiots come to feed.

[Kristev]

That's not nice: I ate Subway for lunch. And my sandwich was very simple. But I'm sorry you went through that. What buffoons.

[Racket_Man]

"I want a Teriyaki but but don't you dare call it that!"

This one actually happened to my co-worker tonight but after he told me about it I knew it had to be posted on here.

A guy came in and he said he wanted a chicken bacon ranch, but with the teriyaki chicken instead of the chicken used for the chicken bacon ranch, and also no bacon.

Co-worker = CW
Idiot= idiot

CW: So you want the Teriyaki then?
Idiot: No, I want the chicken bacon ranch but with the teriyaki chicken and no bacon.
CW: So you're getting the teriyaki...
Idiot: No, NOT the teriyaki! *lather, rinse, repeat same shit*
CW: *mentally face palms and just makes the sandwich*


Subway: Where the idiots come to feed.

YUP there are people that are THAT strange such as the following

C - I want a cheeseburger hold the cheese
me - that would be a hamburger
C - NO I want a CHEESEBURGER hold the CHEESE
me - that would be a hamburger
C - I W A N T A C H E E S E B U R G E R HOLD THE CHEESE
me - <giving up at this point makes a hamburger and wraps it in a cheeseburger wrap and the customer is happy>

[Mytical]

Make sure to charge them for the cheeseburger also. (As hamburgers are cheaper)

[Mikkel]

Make sure to charge them for the cheeseburger also. (As hamburgers are cheaper)

With the extra charge "no-cheese" .

[Mytical]

Oh I like that. Have to remember that one.

[Mikkel]

I learned that one from a fast food place across the street from my bike shop. They would charge for holding things too. They charged one of my customers 3 kroner (about $.50) for "no ketchup" on a hot dog. He was livid.

[Sapphire Silk]

[b]
CW: So you want the Teriyaki then?
Idiot: No, I want the chicken bacon ranch but with the teriyaki chicken and no bacon.
CW: So you're getting the teriyaki...
Idiot: No, NOT the teriyaki! *lather, rinse, repeat same shit*
CW: *mentally face palms and just makes the sandwich*

So what he really wanted was the chicken teriyaki with ranch dressing added

Ick.

I learned that one from a fast food place across the street from my bike shop. They would charge for holding things too. They charged one of my customers 3 kroner (about $.50) for "no ketchup" on a hot dog. He was livid.

As I would be.

[Mikkel]

As I would be.

Sure, so would I.
I thought it funny when it happened, especially the owner's attempt to explain why it was fair, half in Chinese, half in accented Danish. They didn't stay open long.
The practise could be put to good use in the cheeseburger without cheese order .

[Ulrika]

Off Topic, but Twilight Zone moment. After I clicked this thread, I realized that I am currently eating a Teriyaki bowl and drinking a Dr. Pepper.... Get out of my head, Charles!! (Or TheTigress, as the case may be.)

[Plaidman]

"I want a Teriyaki but but don't you dare call it that!"

This one actually happened to my co-worker tonight but after he told me about it I knew it had to be posted on here.

A guy came in and he said he wanted a chicken bacon ranch, but with the teriyaki chicken instead of the chicken used for the chicken bacon ranch, and also no bacon.

Co-worker = CW
Idiot= idiot

CW: So you want the Teriyaki then?
Idiot: No, I want the chicken bacon ranch but with the teriyaki chicken and no bacon.
CW: So you're getting the teriyaki...
Idiot: No, NOT the teriyaki! *lather, rinse, repeat same shit*
CW: *mentally face palms and just makes the sandwich*


Subway: Where the idiots come to feed.

Hmm....was the chicken bacon ranch on sale for five bucks and teriyaki normal 8 bucks? He might have been trying to do the ol SC scam logic apporch.


As for the kid, he might have heard what drink.... though drink and cheese don't rhyme that much...

YUP there are people that are THAT strange such as the following

C - I want a cheeseburger hold the cheese
me - that would be a hamburger
C - NO I want a CHEESEBURGER hold the CHEESE
me - that would be a hamburger
C - I W A N T A C H E E S E B U R G E R HOLD THE CHEESE
me - <giving up at this point makes a hamburger and wraps it in a cheeseburger wrap and the customer is happy>

McDonalds cheeseburgers are different from their normal burgers in more ways then the fact they add cheese... like the onions.

[skeptic53]

Reminds me of the famous diner scene from Five Easy Pieces:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6wtfNE4z6a8

Great movie, btw. If you whippersnappers have never seen it, it's worth renting/downloading.

[JustaCashier]

I'm one of those that will occasionally order a "cheeseburger without cheese", but it's only when the menu listing doesn't specify a no cheese option for a specific burger, such as a deluxe, or double deluxe.

For example, the menu may read something like this:

• Hamburger.........................$1.684
• Cheeseburger.....................$1.792
• Double Hamburger..............$2.253
• Double Cheeseburger...........$2.439
• Super Fred Cheeseburger.....$5.632

Okay, now let's say every burger listed, other than the Super Fred, has just the basic toppings; a squirt of ketchup, a squirt of mustard, a few chopped dehydrated (then reconstituted) onions, and a couple of pickle slices. But, the Super Fred, has mayo, mustard ketchup, relish, pickle, leaf lettuce, tomato, sliced onion, on a sesame seed bun.

Now in general, I don't care for cheese on a burger, unless it's a specialty type burger like a mushroom swiss, or a bacon burger. On your basic, everyday, old-fashioned American burger, I like all of the other basic toppings, like on the Super Fred, and the extra meat patty if offered, (Wendy's Triple®; no cheese!) but for some reason the cheese seems to cover up the taste of the meat.

However, in order not to look too dumb, or be annoying, I'll usually say something like "I'd like a Super Fred, can I get that without cheese?"

I don't recall when I was last denied my request, but I know there's places out there that don't like to do substitutions.

Mike

[TheTigress]

So what he really wanted was the chicken teriyaki with ranch dressing added

Ick.



As I would be.

My co-worker told me he didn't even get ranch on it. I think he got sweet onion sauce or possibly honey mustard.

Hmm....was the chicken bacon ranch on sale for five bucks and teriyaki normal 8 bucks? He might have been trying to do the ol SC scam logic apporch.

Neither the chicken bacon ranch or the teriyaki is $5 at my store. The chicken bacon ranch is also slighly more expensive than the teriyaki.

[EricKei]

C - I W A N T A C H E E S E B U R G E R HOLD THE CHEESE

I once went to one of the -no doubt one among thousands- places called "Cheeseburger In Paradise". One of their menu choices was indeed "A Cheeseburger without cheese" The description of it was even designed to make you feel kinda silly for ordering something like that at a places like that ^_^

As for nit picking on prices...you ain't seen nothing yet.

A very old and well-established local-only burger chain here (Bud's Broiler) does not charge extra for "leave X off", but they have this huge list of charges for add-ons : 30c for add pickles, 50c for light ice/no ice in your drink...and no free refills of course...The owner instructs his workers to put plenty of ice in the cups, the way fast food joints USED to do before it occurred to them that a full cup of Coke cost them much LESS than the cup it was contained in >_< -- My favorite is the large cups; they're the only re-usable cups, and they have a special offer: Refills only 79c with the purchase of a burger and fries...I've seen the full list before, it had to have at least two dozen extra charges on it. And no, you can't get around them unless you just don't ask for anything "extra", either.

The thing is, it really doesn't hurt business because they're so damn GOOD >_< Literally the kind of place where they grab the fresh meat and drop it on this ten-foot wide, brick-clad barbecue grill and make it all fresh to order as you watch, and then they pile on the toppings nice and high once it's ready to serve. Their only (non-chargeable) oddity is that they assume you want onions on all burgers unless you specify otherwise. Their fries suck, tho. Pity.

I've even asked the owner about this before -- no, his name is not Bud -- he's a nice guy, but he just says that's the way he does things. They've been around for almost sixty years now, so I guess most people either don't care about the piddly extra charges, or -- like me -- they know what NOT to ask for ~_~

Oh GD it now I'm hungry...yeah, gimme a #4, double meat, no onions, with sauce....Shit they're closed already (one point in their favor -- many of their stores close at dark. They hold no illusions as to the relative safety of some of the neighborhoods they're near)