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That was what our self-described "Tough Old Broad" cashier (I really liked her) yelled when the 2 kids went out the door with a 12 pack of beer while I was talking to the AM (Assistant Manager,you know,the poor bastards that do all the work but don't get the pay) one night.
So me,the AM & CW working the liquor dept. hot-footed to the door as the 2 kids ran to their car.As we all kinda get there the same time,one of the kids throws the 12-pack at CW,who's 6'3" & a weightlifter.CW was close enough to push the kid,push meaning "send him flyin' head over heels into the rocks in the drainage ditch".
By then AM & Ihad grabbed the other kid,as he told me later,CW wanted to drag him out of the ditch by his ankle,but picked him up anyways & we took the kids to the (front) office to wait for the PD to show up.
These were 15-17 year old kids,so we decided to put the fear of -insert deity- in 'em.CW,the weightlifter,starts talking about "takin' 'em to the back office & teachin' 'em a lesson"...one kid says "What about witnesses?" Of course we all look at each other & say "What witnesses?"
That shuts them down for a bit,then the older one starts telling the younger one something about how jail'll be cool,give 'em street cred.AM overhears this & says "Oh,you think jail's cool huh?" & of course kid gets a fake smug face & I followed AM right up with "Yeah,you'll like it real well when some 300 lb guy decides to make you his wife"
It was all I could do to keep from laughing as his eyes opened wide & he went pale,obviously he hadn't thought about that particular aspect of his cunning but blindingly stupid plan.
I had to take care of my duties,but I saw the cops come in,the following was related to me by AM:
Cops show up,they're also givin' the kids a hard time,hoping to scare them.Smartmouth older kid says something stupid,cops say "We know the judge,you'll spend Christmas in jail" (it was 2-3 days before).
So the kids are pretty much reduced to tears,they're in handcuffs,when the mother of one of them shows up.
Now the cops don't really want to take these kids to jail,they'd rather release them to their parents,after scarin' the shit outta them,hopefully they'll stay away from a life of crime.
Here's the good part:
The mother that showed up was arrested for DWI.
I don't know what happened after that
So me,the AM & CW working the liquor dept. hot-footed to the door as the 2 kids ran to their car.As we all kinda get there the same time,one of the kids throws the 12-pack at CW,who's 6'3" & a weightlifter.CW was close enough to push the kid,push meaning "send him flyin' head over heels into the rocks in the drainage ditch".
By then AM & Ihad grabbed the other kid,as he told me later,CW wanted to drag him out of the ditch by his ankle,but picked him up anyways & we took the kids to the (front) office to wait for the PD to show up.
These were 15-17 year old kids,so we decided to put the fear of -insert deity- in 'em.CW,the weightlifter,starts talking about "takin' 'em to the back office & teachin' 'em a lesson"...one kid says "What about witnesses?" Of course we all look at each other & say "What witnesses?"
That shuts them down for a bit,then the older one starts telling the younger one something about how jail'll be cool,give 'em street cred.AM overhears this & says "Oh,you think jail's cool huh?" & of course kid gets a fake smug face & I followed AM right up with "Yeah,you'll like it real well when some 300 lb guy decides to make you his wife"
It was all I could do to keep from laughing as his eyes opened wide & he went pale,obviously he hadn't thought about that particular aspect of his cunning but blindingly stupid plan.
I had to take care of my duties,but I saw the cops come in,the following was related to me by AM:
Cops show up,they're also givin' the kids a hard time,hoping to scare them.Smartmouth older kid says something stupid,cops say "We know the judge,you'll spend Christmas in jail" (it was 2-3 days before).
So the kids are pretty much reduced to tears,they're in handcuffs,when the mother of one of them shows up.
Now the cops don't really want to take these kids to jail,they'd rather release them to their parents,after scarin' the shit outta them,hopefully they'll stay away from a life of crime.
Here's the good part:
The mother that showed up was arrested for DWI.
I don't know what happened after that
Obviously the apple didn't fall far from that tree!
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