So Angry I Could Commit Authorcide...

[Becks]

(No jokes, I can see where that phrase could go, you degenerates.)

Go ahead. Just *ruin* my fun.

*pout*

[chainedbarista]

bookbint, i agree; no jury would convict you. if you need help hiding the body, let me know.

[Dips]

Bookbint,

Good God! I follow your stories and I admire your restraint and patience. I'm surprised you haven't actually killed one of you loony EW authors yet.

If one of them has to be the first, this one is probably it. No jury in the world would convict you.

[Kogarashi]

That's what my undergrad degree was in, but I've been out of practice enough that I'm not sure I'd trust myself with a big job. I'm still impressed with people who put up with the crazy authors on a regular basis.

[tollbaby]

And if Jester gets overrun with work, I am a professional proofer/editor who no longer works in her chosen profession (lack of work in my area, and I'm not willing to move!).

[Jester]

If you're willing Jester, I may take you up on this offer as well, I have a couple of (fiction) books I'm working on.

My offer stands, to you, the other poster, and anyone else who needs an editor. I'm a walking dictionary, a grammar nazi, and an anal perfectionist. (No jokes, I can see where that phrase could go, you degenerates.)

Anyone who wants to take a chance on a non-professional editor, PM me, and we'll set up a chat/phone call to talk turkey. Maybe even talk books, too.

[Chromatix]

I *can* write. I do a little bit of it in my day job - mostly explaining extremely technical things to customers who should be technical, but aren't as much experts as they like to think they are - and tactfully.

You wouldn't want me as a museum curator though. I'm a perfectionist, so I want to make something better rather than to keep it they way it is.

What you've got there, masquerading as an author, is somebody who should be rejected for both of those jobs, but is somehow in a position where she can dictate that she does both of them anyway.

[CrazedClerkthe2nd]

Serious as a heart attack. If you are serious about it, one day soon we need to sit down and chat, and negotiate terms, such as deadline, specifically what you want (spelling and grammar yes, content no, or whatever), whether I get an editor's credit, and of course recompense. And anything I may have forgotten.

As I am not a "professional" editor, I could understand if you are leery of such a thing, but this is not something I haven't done before. It's just something I haven't done for payment before. (Because of course, I never did this sort of thing for payment in college. Oh no, not me. )

We could discuss this online through an instant messenger or via phone, whichever works for you. Personally, I would enjoy the challenge.

If you're willing Jester, I may take you up on this offer as well, I have a couple of (fiction) books I'm working on.

[Rena_Muffin]

Wow. What an EW. The fact you have not committed Authorcide is a true testament to your patience. It reminds me of the EW's I used to have to deal with in my Fiction Writing class except magnified to like a million times doucheness.

[Jester]

If you are serious, when I get my tax refund (I keep hearing it's in the mail . . . it's in the mail . . .) that may be possible, Jester.

Serious as a heart attack. If you are serious about it, one day soon we need to sit down and chat, and negotiate terms, such as deadline, specifically what you want (spelling and grammar yes, content no, or whatever), whether I get an editor's credit, and of course recompense. And anything I may have forgotten.

As I am not a "professional" editor, I could understand if you are leery of such a thing, but this is not something I haven't done before. It's just something I haven't done for payment before. (Because of course, I never did this sort of thing for payment in college. Oh no, not me. )

We could discuss this online through an instant messenger or via phone, whichever works for you. Personally, I would enjoy the challenge.

[Kristev]

If you are serious, when I get my tax refund (I keep hearing it's in the mail . . . it's in the mail . . .) that may be possible, Jester.

[Jester]

Actually, I'm looking for an editor.

I'm an excellent editor. We could negotiate terms.

[Tama]

Neither do I, honestly....but I guess I can try to self-edit. :P

[Kristev]

I'd never behave that way! I write books for fun, and I'm the first to admit that I don't know a thing about editing.

Actually, I'm looking for an editor.

[Jester]

Apparently, the interviews in the book are GOLD, but the author person spewing shit onto paper is ... um... (not poo, 'cuz poo can get used well...) uh chemical waste? point is, somehow, some way, there is a ruby in pig shit.

Has the publisher considered simply publishing the interviews without the commentary of the author? If her comments bring the work down that much, why not print the interviews as a stand-alone work?

It certainly wouldn't be the first time a book was published with the entire voice of the piece coming from outside voices. Some of the most powerful things I've read have been exactly that.

Just a thought.